Of course. Here is a summary of what internalized misogyny is, based on the experiences and explanations shared by trans individuals.
Based on personal accounts from the trans community, internalized misogyny is a complex and often painful concept. It's not just about individual prejudice; it's about how the sexist ideas woven into our society can become a part of our own thoughts, and how that can be used to hurt others, especially within the trans community. Here are some of the key themes that emerged.
Weaponized Language for Invalidation A common experience, especially for trans women, is having the concept of internalized misogyny used against them to question their identity. Normal human insecurities about appearance or a simple desire to be seen and treated as a woman are often mislabeled as a regressive, patriarchal instinct. As one woman explains, this is a way to undermine her womanhood: "Trans women's desire to be treated as a woman, and the ways they may be insecure or concerned about their appearance, are treated as regressive misogynistic instincts. I can't count the number of times I've been told I 'uphold the patriarchy' by another trans person." – cyborg_sophie source [citation:2dcc2f89-014b-487b-8d1d-b12a4fff2c47] This accusation becomes a tool to police gender expression and enforce conformity.
A Tool to Enforce Conformity For people who are gender non-conforming or transmasculine, the label of "internalized misogyny" is often used to shame them for rejecting femininity. It's presented as a pseudo-feminist idea, but its function is to uphold rigid patriarchal standards. The message is that any deviation from a narrow idea of womanhood is a form of self-hatred. One person shares that this is used to discourage self-discovery: "Painting it in pseudo-feminist language to shame non conformity and uphold the patriarchy. That’s what a lot of it is, don’t question your identity, be the perfect wifey." – FakeBirdFacts source [citation:c0e67be0-0da9-4dc2-a6a1-2da9394c58dd]
Rooted in Self-Hatred and a Desire to Fit In Trans men often describe how, before accepting themselves, they held misogynistic views that stemmed from a place of deep self-hatred and a desperate need to fit into male social circles. They projected their own dysphoria—their pain at being seen as female—onto all women, believing that femininity was inherently inferior. One man reflects, "I ended up feeling pretty loathingly towards women because everything they enjoyed being was something I would be absolutely disgusted to see in myself... if you are still thinking of yourself as a woman, it's pure self-hatred." – 789734095 source [citation:78c0244e-cca2-44a8-a979-e6f06aecd01f] Overcoming these views is part of the journey of self-acceptance.
A Source of Transphobia from Cis People Internalized misogyny in cis people can also be a direct root of transphobia. Cis women who have been taught to devalue womanhood may feel threatened by trans women who actively and joyfully embrace it. This can manifest as jealousy, competitiveness, or territorial behavior. As one trans woman notes, "They've been taught to hate themselves and womanhood in general for so long that when we come around and fight so hard to claim it... it breaks their brains." – Harm-ReductionFairy source [citation:12540e20-1717-4a31-b016-7ce8d6141886]
An Ongoing Process of Unlearning Finally, the community emphasizes that dealing with internalized misogyny is an ongoing process. It involves consciously catching prejudiced thoughts, seeking out positive representations, and understanding that one's personal discomfort with gender roles is not a reflection on others. It’s a journey of unlearning harmful ideas from our upbringing and culture.
In summary, from a trans perspective, internalized misogyny is understood as a harmful force that society imposes on everyone. It can manifest as self-hatred, be weaponized to invalidate trans identities, and create divisions within the community. Recognizing these patterns is a powerful step toward overcoming them and building a more compassionate understanding of ourselves and each other.