Based on the shared experiences from trans community members, here is a summary of strategies for protecting yourself and safely exiting a situation with someone who has shown red flags:

Prioritize Your Safety Above All Else
Your well-being is the most important consideration. If you feel threatened or uncomfortable, it is not only okay but necessary to prioritize your safety over politeness or social obligations. As one community member advises, "Your safety always comes first, so if you gotta lie to him, lie." – AnInsaneMoose source

Create Distance with Plausible Excuses
Avoid direct confrontation by using subtle, believable reasons to limit contact. You can say you have appointments, are helping someone, or are simply busy. The goal is to create space without escalating the situation. Having a trusted friend who can back up your excuses can make this strategy more effective.

Never Be Alone with the Individual
If the person has shown concerning behavior, avoid being in isolated situations with them. As emphasized in the responses, "please never be alone with him" – xigliscouple source This reduces the risk of a dangerous confrontation.

Have an Emergency Plan in Place
Prepare for the possibility that the person may not respect your boundaries. Know where you can go quickly if needed—such as a friend’s home—and consider reaching out to local organizations that support individuals facing threats or domestic violence.

Trust Your Instincts and Act Early
If you notice red flags, don’t wait for the situation to worsen. "If something doesn’t feel right, get yourself out of the encounter." – blainiel source It’s easier to leave early than to extract yourself from a more entrenched dynamic.

Realizing someone is a red flag—even later than you’d hoped—is a sign of growing self-awareness, not failure. By taking thoughtful, safety-focused steps, you are honoring your worth and protecting your peace. You have the strength to navigate this.