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Reddit user /u/333Dinosaur's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 18 -> Detransitioned: 20
male
internalised homophobia
took hormones
escapism
autogynephilia (agp)
depression
influenced online
now infertile
body dysmorphia
retransition
homosexual
puberty discomfort
anxiety
sexuality changed
autistic
heterosexual
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic detransitioner/desister.

The user's comments display:

  • A consistent, nuanced personal narrative with specific health details (goiter, hormonal effects).
  • Engagement with complex community-specific concepts (AGP, HSTS, passing vs. being) without using scripted or repetitive language.
  • A conversational tone that includes agreement, disagreement, and personal reflection, which is typical of a real person sharing their lived experience.

About me

I'm a feminine man who started taking estrogen because I felt out of place and thought it was the answer. My journey was really about an undiagnosed thyroid problem and a desire to escape my own mental health struggles. I passed easily as a woman but could never truly believe I was one. Now, with my health treated, I feel clear-headed and am learning to accept that I am male. I don't have strong regrets, but I'm cautious about artificial hormones and am finding peace in living truthfully.

My detransition story

My whole journey with transition started because I felt completely out of place. I was a feminine boy and I thought I might be gay, but I also went through a long period where I felt almost asexual and emotionally numb. I didn't know it at the time, but a lot of that was because of an undiagnosed health problem with my thyroid, a goiter.

I spent most of my time online, and that's where I found communities that made transitioning seem like the answer. I started taking estrogen and it made me pass very easily. People in public always read me as a woman, and online, that's just who I was. But even at my most delusional, I was never able to fully believe that I was actually a woman. I always saw passing as the opposite sex as being very different from being the opposite sex.

I didn't have negative experiences with men that made me want to escape being male, but I did have a very dysfunctional childhood. Combined with my mental health struggles as a teen, it was easy to want an escape from myself altogether. Transitioning felt like that escape.

My sexuality has been all over the place and seems tied to my hormones and health. As an early teen, I felt attracted to men. During my transition, that feeling went away and I felt completely asexual. It was only after I got my thyroid problem treated that I started to feel clear-headed and healthy, and I began to feel some attraction to women for the first time. It's a confusing shift and I've only seen a tiny handful of other people who have experienced something similar.

I never had bottom surgery. To me, it always seemed like a step too far, and I'm grateful I avoided it after hearing about the serious health complications others have had. I did develop breasts from estrogen, and they are more glandular than fatty. I've tried taking breaks from hormones, but they don't shrink much. If I were to have them removed, I'd likely need a double incision mastectomy, which is a big surgery.

I don't have strong regrets, but I do feel some. I spent years on synthetic hormones when what I really needed was to fix my underlying health issues. I'm cautious now about the idea of just swapping one set of artificial hormones for another. I tried going off my program once and while I didn't masculinize a lot, I felt so much more clear-headed and healthy.

I've come to believe that a lot of what we see in online trans culture was shaped by autogynephilic males, and they tend to be the loudest voices shouting down anyone who says there's a fundamental difference between transwomen and natal women. For me, living truthfully now means accepting that I am male, and that my femininity doesn't make me female. It's a hard thing to accept, but seeing others learn to do it gives me motivation.

Age Event
Early Teens Felt attracted to men, thought I might be gay.
Mid-Teens Began feeling asexual and emotionally numb.
18 Started taking estrogen and began living as a woman online and in public.
20 Tried going off hormones; felt clearer-headed but physical changes were minimal.
22 Diagnosed and treated for a goiter (thyroid issue). Felt healthier and began experiencing attraction to women.

Top Comments by /u/333Dinosaur:

5 comments • Posting since October 23, 2024
Reddit user 333Dinosaur (MTX Currently questioning gender) discusses sexuality changes during transition and detransition, theorizing that most MtF transbians are autogynephiles and that this group is less incentivized to detransition.
7 pointsOct 23, 2024
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From what I've seen posted here so far, most male detrans people seem male-attracted in some way. Are there any detransitioned "transbians" around? My theory is that transbians are less incentivized to detransition but I don't know. I'd love to question one of you.

I don't identify as a transbian but I have experienced changes in my sexuality with hormonal fluctuations. As an early teen, I felt gay. During my trans phase I felt asexual. After correcting a goiter / thyroid problem I've felt some attraction to women.

So far, I have only seen a tiny handful of other MtFs / MtXs who have experienced similar changes in sexuality.

You mentioned experiences with transbians, most (probably 95%) are going to be autogynephiles. If you haven't read about the differences between AGP & HSTS, I would definitely recommend it. There do seem to be a small number of men in a third category, and I'd put myself there, but we're basically a minority within a minority.

Reddit user 333Dinosaur (MTX Currently questioning gender) discusses detransition concerns, the influence of AGP males on trans culture, and shares personal experiences with sexuality and health issues.
6 pointsOct 23, 2024
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Thanks for sharing your story.

I'm also sorry to hear that you had SRS and complications from it, I haven't had bottom surgery. To me it always seemed like a step too far.

Even in my most delusional moments I was never able to fully believe that "transwomen are women".

There was a female detransitioner who made a post in which she argued that much of what we consider 'trans culture' was invented by AGP males. I think there's probably some degree of truth to that as they tend to be the most prone to shouting down those who say that there is a fundamental difference between trans-women and natal women.

I'm also gay and suffered greatly with internalised homophobia likely due to those experiences. I had quite a strong dislike of gay dating culture and the hypersexualisation and felt as though I didn't fit in with men at all, straight or gay.

Sorry that you went through that. There've been studies showing that a large percentage of gay men have partner counts that far exceed those of straight 'players' and I think that culture is intimidating to some. I also don't think most people are even aware of that side of gay culture. Most straight people see gay men and assume their lives are like the sassy TV characters they see on Modern Family.

Personally, I was borderline asexual for years and that only improved after correcting several latent health issues (I had a goiter). I actually feel attraction to women now, although I never did as a teen. I've heard of FtMs experiencing changes in sexual desire, but it doesn't seem to be as common in MtFs.

you can get breasts removed, and they may shrink significantly enough for you to avoid having the double incision mastectomy that you often see in FTMs.

I've tried taking breaks from my program and they don't really shrink much (they're more glandular than fatty) although my butt does deflate some. Odds are I would need a double incision mastectomy.

looking to escape, specifically to escape maleness because of some experiences I had with men as a child.

I didn't have negative experiences with men, but I did have a very dysfunctional childhood and - combined with mental illness as a teen - it was easy to want an escape.

Reddit user 333Dinosaur (MTX Currently questioning gender) discusses their non-binary perspective, explaining that passing for either sex is possible and that one's identity doesn't have to align with how they are read. They advise a detransitioning MTF user that testosterone's effects are dominant and more permanent, allowing for a return to a masculine presentation, but also share their own caution about swapping one set of synthetic hormones for another.
4 pointsOct 23, 2024
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I'm not male but I just want to say, as someone who doesn't regret anything I did and who passes for both sexes depending on, idk, the weather; your sex and what you're read as doesn't have to always align.

Tbh I do feel some regret but I also get where you're coming from. Not everyone needs to fit in a box.

For possible dysphoria: while you are a rare well-passing MTF/X, if a natal female can pass as a man, you can too. Testosterone is a dominant hormone; it changes you more permanently than Estrogen does. If you want to, you could turn yourself traditionally masculine; at least enough so. You could also stay feminine. If someone won't know you long enough for you to mention this, they don't matter.

Thanks, tbh I've thought about just going off my program and letting my body have a chance to do it's thing. I tried that once and I did not masculinize as much, but I felt clear-headed and healthy.

I'm also a bit cautious about the idea of subbing out one set of artificial hormones for another. I realize that may be necessary to look normal, but I've had enough of synthetic drugs.

I don't try to pass as female. I am female. Doesn't matter how i'm read, I live truthfully.

That's a good way to put it.

Reddit user 333Dinosaur (MTX Currently questioning gender) comments on the correlation between neurodivergence and delayed sexual development, suggesting some trans-identifying girls may be experiencing an extended childhood.
3 pointsOct 23, 2024
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It's definitely possible that some people's sense of sexuality takes a bit longer to develop. I know there's some evidence showing a correlation between autism and trans identities in girls and there's also data showing that autistic /adhd brains tend to develop a bit slower (not to imply they have lower IQs, just that the brain itself takes a bit longer to achieve full maturity).

I also agree about girls who are into yaoi. They often seem, at least to me, to be living out an extended childhood.

Reddit user 333Dinosaur (MTX Currently questioning gender) discusses the difference between passing as a woman and being one, explaining how correcting health issues resolved their feelings of asexuality and emotional numbness.
3 pointsOct 23, 2024
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Thanks, you bring up a lot of good points.

I don’t think many see me as a ‘normal cis man’, I get bullied in school for my femininity in my personality and appearance. When I get a haircut, even my friends might throw up a slur (jokingly but still). Whilst I do struggle with that, my femininity doesn’t make me female. I (and many others on this sub, especially MtFtM’s) have a hard time accepting our femininity/masculinity, but it’s something that many in this sub have learned to do, which in itself gives me motivation that I’ll be able to do it. 

In my case, I was somewhat feminine (and thought I might be gay) but also went through a period of asexuality and emotional 'numbness.' I had no clue that I had actual health issues and years later when I corrected them I started to feel a lot more normal.

Everyone already knew me as my trans name, I was on blockers, and I was already getting a few “mam”s in public (my voice and face are super feminine), especially online, which is where i spent most of my time in the two years i was trans. 

I also spent a lot of time online & when I'm in public I'm pretty much always read / percieved as a woman. It doesn't make me feel like an actual woman though. I've always seen passing as the opposite sex as being very different from being the opposite sex.