This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic user. The comments display a consistent, detailed, and emotionally nuanced personal narrative of medical detransition (5 years on testosterone, top surgery, hysterectomy) and the ongoing process of social and physical re-feminization. The writing style is natural, with personal reflections, specific timelines, and varied emotional tones (frustration, hope, gratitude) that are consistent with a genuine lived experience.
About me
I started transitioning to male as a teenager because I was deeply uncomfortable with being a woman. I was on testosterone for five years and had surgeries, but I eventually realized I was deeply unhappy being seen as a man. I stopped hormones and had to relearn how to be a woman, which was strange but cathartic. I'm now a flat-chested woman who sometimes gets misgendered, but I finally feel happy and free. My journey taught me there isn't one way to be a woman, and I'm finally living as my authentic self.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been a long and complicated one. Looking back, I think a lot of my decision to transition came from a place of deep discomfort with myself that started when I was a teenager. I was always running away from anything feminine. I hated the idea of being a woman and all the expectations that came with it.
I started identifying as a trans man when I was 16 and began taking testosterone. I was on it for nearly five years. During that time, I also had top surgery and a full hysterectomy, though I kept my ovaries so my body still produces estrogen. At the time, I was convinced this was the right path for me. I even remember people telling me they "had no idea I was trans," which I took as a compliment back then because I wanted so badly to be seen as masculine.
But things started to change for me. I began to feel disconnected from the person I had become. I moved back to college and realized I was deeply unhappy being perceived as male. It was a scary feeling, worrying that I had permanently changed myself and would never be seen as a woman again. I stopped taking testosterone about eight months ago, and that's when my real detransition began.
The first few months were strange. I had to relearn how to be a woman, something I had actively avoided since I was a kid. What helped me most was starting with small, external things. I got my eyebrows waxed for the first time and started experimenting with makeup. I had never allowed myself to do that while I was living as a man, and it felt incredibly cathartic. I started wearing women's clothes again, which actually fit my small frame much better. At first, I tried wearing fake breasts, but I quickly realized I actually love being flat-chested. I'm thankful for my top surgery in that way; it feels right for me now.
I still struggle sometimes. I'm 5'4" with short, curly hair that I'm growing out. Even with makeup and feminine clothes, I get gendered correctly only about half the time. My voice is another challenge; I have to consciously work on not deepening it instinctively and being less monotone. Over the phone, people sometimes mistake me for a man, which is frustrating. I also have an eating disorder called ARFID, which makes it very hard for me to eat and gain weight. I feel full after only a small amount of food, and I think a lot of it is tied to anxiety.
But despite these challenges, I feel happier and freer than I have in years. I've found a femininity that I spent so long running from. The imposter syndrome I felt when I first started presenting as female again has mostly faded. I know now that there isn't one way to be a woman, and I can be a flat-chested, short woman with a slightly deeper voice and still be me.
Do I have regrets? It's complicated. I don't regret my top surgery because I'm comfortable with my flat chest. But I do regret not understanding myself better before making permanent changes. I think my transition was a way to escape from myself, from my anxiety, and from the pressures of being a woman. I'm dating men now, and I feel like I'm finally living in a way that is authentic to who I really am, without having to hide or perform.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| My Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 16 | Started identifying as a trans man and began taking testosterone. |
| 16-21 | Was on testosterone for nearly 5 years. Also had top surgery and a hysterectomy (keeping ovaries) during this time. |
| 21 (May 10th) | Stopped taking testosterone and began my detransition. |
| 21 (3 months off T) | Moved back to college, feeling down about still being gendered as male. |
| 21 (7.5 months off T) | Felt much more comfortable, embracing femininity through makeup, clothes, and accepting my flat chest. |
| 22 (Present) | Continuing to work on my voice and manage my eating disorder, but feeling happy and free as a woman. |
Top Comments by /u/859473857:
Firstly thank you for commenting. Unfortunately I do have an eating disorder. I want to gain weight so badly but I have a very hard time eating food. I’m thinking a good anxiety medication will likely help, because I only avoid eating out of fear of getting sick from it. I’ve been diagnosed with ARFID and I usually feel very full after a small amount of food.
Can I ask what helped you gain a healthy amount of weight? I am really struggling to be honest
thank you for sharing this story. i have recently moved back into college and have been feeling quite down because i am still masculine and get gendered male at this point in my detransition— it has been 3 months off of T for me and i often feel afraid i will never be gendered female again.
im 5’4” and have had top surgery & a full hysterectomy (sparing ovaries though so my estrogen levels are normal now). at first i tried wearing fake boobs but i realized i actually really love being flat chested after all. im thankful for that. it feels good to finally feel female, whatever that means
You raise a good point. I have had the nosering for a long time and it's definitely a relic from my edgy teenager rebel days. I date men, so I definitely don't want to convey the wrong idea ig, lol.
Thank you for the input. I appreciate your honesty.
first of all you are really pretty and your hair is gorgeous! i was on testosterone for nearly 5 years starting when i was 16. i have been off for 7 and a half months. what initially helped me get in touch with my femininity was getting my eyebrows waxed and wearing makeup— pretty simple, external things, but i had NEVER allowed myself to do that while i was presenting as a trans man. i had basically been avoiding femininity since i was a kid, so now as i finally let myself explore the other side of the gender binary, it was cathartic. it started with makeup, and then i started wearing wigs because i had a buzzcut, but ive since grown my hair out and its too difficult to put on a wig anymore (i have very curly poofy hair). i am short , small framed and i never had much facial hair on T so when i wore a wig out even at 1 month off T i was always gendered correctly— as a woman. i felt a lot of imposter syndrome when i started presenting as my birth sex but this has mostly gone away now. basically for me, “treating myself” with feminine “rituals” like wearing makeup and getting my brows done, and wearing womens clothes (which fit better anyway) helped me feel more comfortable, and then also KNOWING that i am a woman helps too. reminding myself that there isnt one way for a woman to look. hope this helps a little!
echoing all of this. i feel you, as a 5’4” girl with very short curly hair— im growing it out but yes it takes time :(. i used to wear a wig but its just so much work. i try to wear makeup and feminine clothes, but its a 50/50 chance that i get gendered correctly at this point. so i guess the clothes and makeup help but still its frustrating
i had issue with receding hairline while 5 yrs on t. i took finasteride for most of those years, and went off t a couple months ish ago (may 10). went off finasteride too. i think your hairline will grow back slowly as your body goes back to how it was.
oh ok, i guess ill have to ask my dr for a note. can you just call them, or do you have to do it with an appointment? i dont know anything about this as all of this legal stuff was done for me by my parents :( as for the name thing how long did it take you? i havent printed any forms out yet. ik i need a few. im in Connecticut
I always thought I looked so masculine lol people would often tell me they "had no idea I was trans." I am definitely thankful for how my body didnt actually change much on testosterone (i could never grow a beard either). The first couple of months "being a woman again" were strange, but I am so happy and I feel so free now that I've found my femininity again-- the very thing I spent so long trying to run away from.
I'm working on my voice still, little by little. I have to get rid of the masculine vocal tendencies I learned to have-- like deepening my voice to talk to strangers instinctively, and being very monotone. But yeah, people generally dont bat an eye at my voice IRL-- its just over the phone for now that im having trouble.