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Reddit user /u/875857's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 21 -> Detransitioned: 24
female
took hormones
regrets transitioning
influenced online
got top surgery
now infertile
body dysmorphia
retransition
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.

The user demonstrates:

  • A consistent, multi-year personal narrative of detransition, including specific surgical and medical details (e.g., top surgery regret, breast reconstruction with expanders/implants, voice training, laser hair removal).
  • Deep, personal engagement with the emotional and physical challenges of detransition, expressed with nuanced and varied emotion (hope, sadness, frustration, support).
  • Practical, first-hand advice on detransition-related procedures and experiences that is complex and specific, making it difficult to fabricate.

The passion and detail align with an authentic detransitioner's experience.

About me

I started testosterone and had top surgery in my early twenties, believing I was meant to be a man. It didn't fix my unhappiness, and those feelings vanished completely by the time I was 24. I deeply regret the surgery and took steps to reverse it, including stopping hormones and getting breast reconstruction. I now see my transition as a phase I was swept up in during a vulnerable time. I'm finally feeling like myself again, just a woman who got lost for a while.

My detransition story

My whole journey with gender started when I was around 21. I was in college and felt really anxious and insecure all the time. I got it into my head that I was supposed to be a man, and I started taking testosterone. I had top surgery, a double mastectomy, a little while after that. I went through with the whole medical transition.

But the whole time, I was still unhappy. I thought transitioning would fix my mental health, but it didn't. Then, almost overnight, just after I turned 24, the feeling that I was supposed to be male just vanished. It was like my brain finally settled. Now, at 29, I can barely recognize the anxious, floaty person I was back then. I was just so completely in my own head.

Looking back, I think a big part of it was my age. My brain was still developing, and I was really influenced by what I saw online, especially in the art communities I was in. It seemed like every artist I followed was coming out as trans or non-binary and talking about starting hormones or getting top surgery. It felt like the thing to do, and I got swept up in it. I don't really identify with the idea of being trans at all anymore; I'm just trying to feel like the old me again.

I definitely have regrets about transitioning. The biggest one is getting top surgery. After a traumatic event, I made the decision to get it really quickly, and I ended up deeply unhappy with my flat chest. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror and I had to change my entire wardrobe to hide my chest. I felt lost and alone, and I worried a lot about my future, especially with dating, since I had put that part of my life on hold.

To fix things, I’ve taken a lot of steps. I stopped testosterone. I started voice training to make my voice sound feminine again, and after a few months of practice, I can pass as female over the phone. I also got laser hair removal on my face and neck to deal with the facial hair from testosterone.

The biggest step for me was getting breast reconstruction. I spent a long time researching it on detrans forums. I finally got tissue expanders put in and then had them exchanged for silicone implants over the muscle. It’s not exactly the same as before, but having my chest back massively helped my self-confidence. It was probably the biggest thing that helped me feel normal again. I can wear swimsuits and normal clothes now. I even met my current boyfriend around the time I had the surgery, and he's been very accepting.

My thoughts on gender now are that it's not so black and white. I used to believe a lot of spiritual stuff about being trans, but it didn't help me. I think the idea that "feeling good on HRT means you're truly trans" is more spiritual than scientific. For me, it was a phase I needed to grow out of. I'm just a woman who got very, very lost for a few years.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

Age Event
21 Started taking testosterone and socially transitioning.
22 Had top surgery (double mastectomy).
24 My dysphoria vanished. I stopped testosterone and began detransitioning.
24-25 Started voice training and laser hair removal.
29 Had breast reconstruction with implants.

Top Comments by /u/875857:

21 comments • Posting since October 4, 2021
Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) explains how her gender dysphoria vanished after her brain "settled" in her mid-20s, making her transition from ages 21-23 difficult to understand in hindsight.
31 pointsApr 12, 2022
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My brain definitely "settled" around 24 years old and now at 29 I can barely recognize the anxious, insecure, floaty person that went down the transition route in college (19-22).

I feel this. I transitioned from 21-23 and shortly after I turned 24 my dysphoria vanished. I already have a hard time understanding why I went through with transition in the first place, I was just so completely in my own head at the time.

As for the article, I'm glad more stories like this can be shared and it's interesting to hear the perspective of someone who transitioned in the 90's. I hope the author finds peace.

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) advises a user to cancel their top surgery, explaining it's okay to change your mind and that the procedure cannot be truly undone.
22 pointsMay 17, 2023
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From what you've written here it doesn't sound like you're ready to go through with it. There's nothing wrong with cancelling it and giving yourself more time to think. You can always change your mind but you can never truly undo that kind of procedure. Keep listening to yourself, but most importantly give yourself more time!

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) comments on bottom growth insecurity, sharing a personal dating experience where a partner initially made a "gay" joke but later apologized and became accepting after educating himself.
20 pointsJun 2, 2023
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i can answer the casual sex part because i had it yesterday and the guy was first kinda confused and asked if i'd been on hormones, if i was biologically female and how i identified (not exactly in those words but not with any ill intent), then said he knew someone else whose gf had the same thing and joked that it felt kinda gay to suck on it but things went on normally. i told him i didn't like the gay comment tho lol

EDIT: just as an update i continued seeing this guy and the second time we met he apologized for his comments (he was high at the time) and said he looked into big clit stuff and finds it hot now hahah

a good thing to do is say you're looking for sensitive and open-minded people in your bio which i think implies that things are not all going to be as expected without saying anything specific. also you are super young so please be safe on dating apps!!

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) explains how her gender dysphoria and desire to be male disappeared practically overnight around age 24, after medical transition failed to fix her underlying unhappiness.
19 pointsAug 10, 2022
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My dysphoria and desire to be male stopped about a month after I turned 24, practically overnight, though it was preceded by a LONG time of being unhappy and not understanding why since I'd medically transitioned (which was supposedly going to fix my mental health). My experience really made me think that the brain development thing must be true lol, though I know it's not the case for everyone

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) explains how breast reconstruction surgery restored her confidence and allowed her to wear clothing she had to avoid after detransitioning.
18 pointsApr 20, 2025
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can't tell if there's any integrity to this or if it's just ragebait but getting breast reconstruction absolutely helped me get back to my normal life again. i was deeply unhappy with my top surgery results and could barely look at myself in the mirror, much less show myself to another person. my entire wardrobe had to hide my flat chest in some way. since getting reconstruction and putting myself out there more i've finally built the confidence i never had before or during transition. i can once again wear swimsuits, low-cut tops, fancy dresses, and all the other things i had to shun for years. yes all implants have a chance of causing issues but for me it was worth the risk.

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) explains why feeling good on HRT is not a definitive sign of being trans, citing cases of long-term satisfaction fading, detransitioners who still use HRT, and the unscientific nature of the belief.
16 pointsApr 26, 2023
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I think it's not so black-and-white. Many people initially felt satisfied on HRT (even for years) but the feeling went away at some point. Some people detransition even though HRT did make them feel better, and there are also those who socially detransition but continue to take HRT due to preferring the effects or out of necessity. There are also trans people who cannot handle HRT and have to stop.

"Feeling good on HRT" as an indicator whether someone is truly trans sounds a bit more spiritual than scientific. I used to believe a lot of really spiritual stuff about being trans and it really didn't help me in the end.

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) comments on the difficulty of confusing discussions with non-detrans people, explaining that a friend's comparison of her body dysphoria to "transfem dysphoria" felt invalidating as she seeks to return to her pre-transition self, not identify as trans.
13 pointsApr 24, 2022
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This is really similar to how I feel on gender nowadays, though I think being gendered as male if I was trying to present female would depress me.

A close friend of mine who transitioned alongside me said my unhappiness with my masculinized body is the same thing as transfem dysphoria, and that it's practically like I'm trans the other way now. I didn't like that description because I don't identify with transness at all anymore, I'm just trying to feel like the old me again.

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) discusses the pressure to frame detransition as a "gender journey" to remain accepted in a militant online art community saturated with trans and non-binary identities.
8 pointsJan 17, 2023
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yep i feel the same way! i follow like 900 artists and i think only a couple would still identify as cis at this point, for a while it was just constant coming out as trans/nb and starting hrt posts and i was like umm...guys...😅 and so much top surgery art, something i'd prefer to not be reminded about!!

since being trans in the western artist community is so prevalent now i think it's inevitable there'll be more detrans artists, but the way the community is so militant i wouldnt be surprised if people felt too scared to say anything negative about their experiences and lose all the support they'd built.

in the end i really don't like framing my own experiences as a "gender journey" but if it means i can be detrans and still on the right side of the community i might do it tbh :p

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) comments on dating after top surgery, sharing that her boyfriend was very accepting of her breast reconstruction and said he would have been with her regardless.
8 pointsNov 23, 2023
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Not sure if this counts since I've had breast reconstruction, but I met my current boyfriend the same month I had my tissue expanders replaced with implants. He was very accepting and has never said anything negative about it but he's definitely an ass man so he talks way more about my ass lol. He also said he would've been with me even if I didn't have the reconstruction which is nice :)

Reddit user 875857 (detrans female) comments on a post about SRS reversal, sharing their own negative surgical experience and asking for surgeon recommendations for VFS and breast reconstruction in the US.
8 pointsApr 12, 2022
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I'm so glad you found an empathetic surgeon, I definitely didn't have a surgical experience like that and I wish I had. I hope all goes well with the reversal! Could I ask what surgeons you've been looking into for VFS/breast reconstruction (if you're in the US)? Thanks!