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Reddit user /u/Afalpin's Detransition Story

Detransitioned: 22
female
took hormones
regrets transitioning
trauma
influenced online
got top surgery
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on these comments, the account appears authentic.

There are no serious red flags for it being a bot or an inauthentic detransitioner/desister. The comments show:

  • Personal, consistent narrative: A coherent story of medical transition starting young (16/18) due to trauma and a desire for control, followed by regret.
  • Emotional resonance: The tone matches the expected passion and pain, ending a reflective comment with "you’ll be okay ❤️".
  • Practical detail: Specific, credible references like a preferred binder brand ("spectrum outfitters") add authenticity.

The account does not display the patterns of a propaganda bot.

About me

I felt out of place as a young girl and transitioned to escape my trauma and deep unhappiness. I started testosterone at 16 and had top surgery at 18, thinking it was my only path forward. I eventually realized my body wasn't the problem and that my pain came from untreated trauma and a need to belong. I now know I was too young for such permanent decisions and needed real therapy instead. My journey taught me that you can be okay just as you are.

My detransition story

My name isn't important, but my story is. I’m a female who transitioned and then detransitioned, and I want to share my journey in my own words.

It all started when I was young. I felt like I didn't fit in anywhere socially. I had a lot of trauma from abuse, and looking back, I think I was using the idea of transition to try and gain some control over my life when I felt like I had none. What I saw online had a huge influence on me, much bigger than I realized at the time. I became convinced that the body I was born into was wrong and that changing it was the only way to fix the deep unhappiness I felt.

I started taking hormones when I was 16. At the time, it felt like it saved my life because it gave me a sense of purpose and a path forward. But I now see it didn't treat the underlying causes of my pain, which were trauma and a desperate need to belong. When I was 18, I got top surgery. I hated my breasts and wanted them gone. I used a binder from a reputable brand before that, which helped, but surgery felt like the final step.

For a while, I thought I had solved my problems. But the feelings of not being right, of still being uncomfortable, never really went away. I started to realize that my body itself doesn't have to mean anything. My body is just my body. It doesn't have to be a "home" or represent anything deeper. I put so much weight on it, but it bears no real weight on who I am.

I live in homeless housing now, but that’s a direct result of the abuse I suffered, not because I was trans or detransitioned. People are quick to link everything to being trans, but life is more complicated than that.

I deeply believe that no one should be pushed into medical decisions without serious, non-affirming therapy first. I wasn’t made to go through any real therapy, and I think that’s a huge failure of the system. I was too young to be making those permanent decisions at 16 and 18. I was desperate to be an adult and make adult choices, but I wasn't ready.

I don't regret my transition in the sense that it was a part of my journey and I learned from it, but I do regret not addressing my trauma and other issues first. I would tell my younger self that it's okay to feel out of place, and that dressing or presenting how you want doesn't define your gender. Societal expectations mean nothing. You can dress in skirts and still be a man, or wear pants and be a woman. You should just dress in what makes you most comfortable.

Mostly, I’d tell my younger self that she’ll be okay.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

My Age Year Event
16 - Started taking testosterone hormones
18 - Had top surgery (double mastectomy)
22 - Began the process of detransitioning

Top Comments by /u/Afalpin:

5 comments • Posting since March 23, 2024
Reddit user Afalpin (Questioning own transgender status) comments on the importance of therapy before medical transition, stating that one's body "bares no weight on anything" and that overthinking the feeling of "home" is a sign to pause.
40 pointsDec 17, 2024
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This is just my take, but if it’s a consideration of feeling like home, you’re thinking too much about it. My body is my body, and bares no weight on anything. I will say, please make sure you go through therapy before hormones and surgery- I wasn’t made to, like many others. But anyways, hope whatever you decide on is the right decision for you!

Reddit user Afalpin (Questioning own transgender status) comments that avoiding a cashier who uses an old name is a form of people-pleasing and calls the OP a jerk in the scenario.
23 pointsJun 13, 2024
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Because you atah here. She’s being friendly, it makes you uncomfortable for more than one reason, but you won’t tell her. She’s probably wondering why you’re avoiding her and people pleasing would be to go along with it, not people pleasing would be to correct her nicely. I’m afraid you’re just a bit of a jerk in this scenario as far as you’ve given us info.

Reddit user Afalpin (Questioning own transgender status) explains what they would tell their younger self: that social alienation and trauma, not body dysphoria, were the root causes, and to avoid making permanent medical decisions like hormones and surgery at 16 and 18.
18 pointsApr 18, 2025
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I’d tell my younger self that it’s okay to feel like you don’t fit in anywhere socially, that the influence of what you see through a screen is so much greater than you realise or want to believe. I’d tell myself that I have a lot of trauma from a lot of things causing me to feel like this, and that what body I was born into isn’t a massive deal even though I thought it was at the time. I’d warn myself that although I’m desperate to make adult decisions so that I feel like I have some sort of control over my life, I’m too young to be deciding hormones and surgery are the right decision at 16 and 18.

And I’d tell myself you’ll be okay ❤️

Reddit user Afalpin (Questioning own transgender status) explains that clothing doesn't define gender and advises on safe binding practices.
13 pointsMar 30, 2024
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Dress how you want, present how you want. Societal expectations mean nothing- dressing in skirts doesn’t make you a girl, same vice versa, you should dress how you feel is most comfortable to you. If you’re more comfortable binding, do it, but be aware of the risks it carries and do so sensibly with a reputable brand (I liked spectrum outfitters before I had surgery)

Reddit user Afalpin (Questioning own transgender status) comments that while medical transition saved their life, it didn't treat the underlying cause of their distress, which was abuse.
4 pointsMar 23, 2024
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Medically transitioning at that point in time did save my life, but it didn’t treat the underlying cause. I live in homeless housing but that’s because of abuse anyways, not directly linked to being trans. I think people are quick to link these things to being cures, without looking at other influences/ causes.