This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's narrative is highly specific, emotionally nuanced, and internally consistent. They describe a complex and painful personal journey of detransitioning for mental health reasons, not because their gender dysphoria disappeared. This aligns with known desister experiences where a person stops transition because it is not alleviating their distress, even if the desire to be the other sex remains. The language is personal, reflective, and lacks the repetitive or agenda-driven patterns of a troll or bot.
About me
I always wished I had been born a girl, so I transitioned in my early twenties. The reality of living as a woman was nothing like my fantasy and being constantly misgendered made me severely depressed. I detransitioned as a practical choice for my mental health, not because I suddenly felt like a man. It took about six months after stopping hormones for my depression to finally start to lift. I accept that I am male, and I've learned that my personality and who I am doesn't depend on being a woman.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started from a deep and persistent feeling that I wished I had been born a girl. For as long as I can remember, I had fantasies about magically changing into a woman. I wanted to have girl friends and be part of their groups, and I also liked the idea of wearing women's clothes. A big part of it, which is embarrassing to admit, was that I wished I could have sex as a woman. I had this idea that being a girl was what was right for me.
Because of these feelings, I decided to transition. I thought living as a woman was the answer to my unhappiness. I started living as a woman and taking hormones, which gave me some breast growth. But the reality of transition was nothing like my fantasies. I realized that no surgery could give me a "real" vagina, and that was something I truly wanted. I also don't like makeup and I prefer simple, plain clothes, so even when I was trying to present as female, I still looked male to strangers. I was constantly misgendered, called "sir," and it made me feel like a creep. I became severely depressed and even suicidal because I knew I would never be seen as a woman in the eyes of others.
I came to a point where I realized that before I learned about being trans, I was actually happier. Transition wasn't giving me what I wanted; it was actually increasing my dysphoria and making my depression worse. I made the decision to detransition and live as a male again, not because I suddenly "knew I was a man," but because it was a compromise I could live with for my mental health. It was a practical choice, not an identity one. I still wish I had been born female, but I accept that I am male and that's okay.
The depression stayed with me for many months after I stopped, but it was a different kind of depression. After about half a year, I finally started to feel better. I have small breasts from the hormones, but no one seems to notice or comment on them. I just let them be. People generally don't scrutinize you the way you scrutinize yourself.
Looking back, I think my desire to be a woman was rooted in a specific idea of what that meant, and reality couldn't match that idea. For me, transition wasn't the answer. I don't regret exploring it because I needed to see for myself that it wouldn't work, but I do regret how much it hurt my mental health for a while. I believe now that if you don't particularly want to be a woman, then transition isn't for you. A lot of things about personality and who you get along with are true no matter if you're male or female.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Early 20s | Started having persistent feelings of wanting to be a woman. |
| 23 | Began social transition and started taking estrogen. |
| 24 | Realized transition was increasing dysphoria and depression; decided to detransition. Stopped hormones. |
| 24.5 | Began to feel mental health improving after half a year of detransition. |
Top Comments by /u/Ashes-of-the-Phoenix:
Personally I don’t care about the breast growth. I’m like an a or b cup and I just let it be. No one comments on it or stares so I figure they don’t notice it. When I was presenting female I got a lot of sirs and such so I figure people don’t see the beasts at all.
And someone said something to me. They said it could just be fat left from recently losing a lot of weight. If you look for it you see other men with little lumps there whether it’s fat or muscle so mine aren’t much different from that. Just bigger I guess but who’s clever enough to see that in all honesty?
Just remember, people aren’t looking to dis you or look down on you. People generally don’t care and don’t notice. They aren’t trying to critique you in any way unless it’s their job to lol. Most people see you in a neutral or positive light.
I’m mtftm, but I wanted to share my story.
I actually still wish I were born female. But I detransitioned because I wasn’t happy presenting as a female. I wasn’t into makeup and feminine clothes, and didn’t want surgery, I felt dysphoric and depressed. I came to realize that living as a trans woman was not my journey. I detransitioned to male for mental health reasons, basically.
I didn’t “know I was a man”, I decided being a man was better for me.
Personally I’m not exactly not trans. But transition is not the answer I need.
What happened was depression. Living as a woman was a challenge I don’t want to face. I’m living as a man despite wishing I was born a woman. The reality is that nothing transition has to offer will give me what I want. And really coming to terms with that was what made me realize transition isn’t for me.
The dysphoria came for me when I learned I was trans and the dysphoria had me severely depressed. I wasn’t into makeup and didn’t want surgery and I dress in simple plain clothes, so the reality was that I looked male even when presenting female and so I was constantly misgendered. I knew I’d never be a woman in the eyes of strangers and that had me suicidal. I realized that before I was trans I was happier, and realized it would be healthier for me to be a male.
The depression stayed for many months but it was different, now I’m starting to be better after half a year. The reality is that I wish I were born female, but as it stands I’m male instead and that’s okay.
My response is IMO, I’m no expert or anything so this is just what I think.
Do you want to be a woman? It isn’t about can you see yourself as one, though that is part of it. If you want to transition to be a woman because you want to be a woman, then it’s for you. If you don’t particularly want it though, don’t transition.
All the things you shared about your likes and personalities and who you get along with is stuff that’s true regardless of if you’re a male or female. Men can be like that, women can be like that. Don’t describe yourself as trans, and for that reason transition. Affirm that you want to be a woman or don’t.
For me, I really always wanted girl friends. I wanted to hang out with other girls and be with them as a friend.
I also liked wearing women’s clothes
I also have wished I could be a girl so that I could have sex as one. It’s embarrassing but it’s one of the things. But that wasn’t the reason I transitioned, because personally surgery won’t give me a real vagina. I hope this wasn’t tmi.
I used to have fantasies of magically being able to change my gender. Being a girl has always been something that felt like it was right for me.
Those are the biggest reasons, personally.
You didn’t ask but if your curious, I’m detrans because what I really want is to be a “real” woman, like born as one. Transition won’t give me what I want and I found in fact that transition increased my dysphoria and was causing depression for me. I always felt like a creep that other people were judging and that wasn’t healthy for me so I stopped transition and will just live as a male. It’s a compromise, but one I can live with.