Don’t have advice but I really feel you. Every time someone talks about the “advantages” of being female I roll my eyes.

“Women have been mental health because they can be open about their emotions 🥺” I don’t care. “Women have healthier hearts” I don’t care. I’m not soft or feminine or nurturing or particularly nice and I don’t want to be. I want to be tough. I want to be strong.

I would recommend that you try lifting weights or doing muscle building exercises. If you build your strength, you will be strongly than the scrawny men who don’t try, and there’s a fair number of those. You said you do martial arts, I’m sure you are stronger than some men even if you don’t think you are. And you almost certainly can fight better than them.

And I would recommend that you separate yourself from generalizations. I often find myself upset after getting caught up in the generalizations of being female that I don’t want to associate with, the best I can do is think “I’m not just a woman, or a man. I’m me. I’m myself.”. I hope this helps a little.

Notice that for the first three examples, they use the word transition. But for the last examples (which would be cis detransitioners / desisters), they use the word “experiment”. Almost as if they want want to acknowledge that a person can transition and then regret it.

I was trying to find detrans content on Tumblr and got a bunch of kink stuff. It was awful. You’re right, a lot of it is severely misogynistic and it says a lot of how these people view women. I’m sure they’d deny being sexist outside of the kink, but it’s still concerning.

When I found these posts, I was NOT looking for any kink content. There was so much that I got genuinely confused “did I accidentally search for this instead of the normal detrans tag”, and I hadn’t. I’d just searched for detrans. These people tag their kink posts with #detrans, and I honestly think they know what they’re doing. I think they like the idea of actual detrans people encountering their posts. I think they resent us.

I’m glad someone else is talking about this. It really sucks.

Not really an opinion but more of an experience,

one of the key things that made me realize that I’m probably not trans was top surgery, however I don’t exactly “regret” it nor do I feel uncomfortable with having a flat chest. It’s more just that the complete lack of relief from such a major surgery disillusioned me to the idea that fully transitioning will fix my dperession. I actually am fine with having a flat chest, the scars are the only part of it that bothers me.

I also saw a post once where a detransitioner said that her clinic had told her that they’d never had a patient detransition before. She later came into contact with a detransitioner from the same clinic. It’s very possible that clinic don’t keep sufficient data on detransition.

Also, I find it funny that truscum hate “egg culture” yet they frequently use the same language and ideas when it comes to non-trans dysphorics.

Calling people “repressors”, saying stuff like “they’ll figure it out in a few years” “they can’t be in denial forever”, and disregarding what they’re actually be told by the person in question.

Yeah, I think it’s really messed up that medical transition is advertised as the only solution to dysphoria. I think medical transition should be available, but I think the main aim of therapy should be to help cope with dysphoria without it. Medical transition should only be pursued when nothing else has worked.

Probably a lot of internalized misogyny. They don’t want to live as women in their daily lives because they know it’s more difficult, but they want to be a woman in bed because they view being female as hypersexualizing and degrading. That’s why 99% of detrans kink accounts are “trans men”. I’ve only seen one AMAB with a detrans kink.

Truscum: Someone who thinks you need dysphoria to be trans

Tucute: Someone who thinks you don’t need dysphoria to be trans

The terms are pretty broad and carry their own connotations (ex: tucute is sometimes used as a general term to refer to hyperliberal LGBT people), and additionally, how a person defines “dysphoria” can vary, resulting in variability in what the term actually means. So for example, some truscum think that you can be trans if you only have social dysphoria and not physical dysphoria, since social is technically a form of dysphoria. Others think you need to have physical dysphoria. Some tucutes believe that although you don’t need to have dysphoria, you need to have “incongruence”, aka you need to feel disconnected from your assigned sex. And then some truscum believe that incongruence counts as a form of dysphoria therefore you can be trans with just incongruence.

So basically, a truscum believes that you have to experience some distress from your assigned sex to be trans, while a tucute believes that you don’t need to experience distress.

I feel the same way. I don’t want to be treated any differently than a man, in any context. I don’t think men and women should be treated differently socially. And I agree with you on gender-dominated workplaces, I don’t want to “defy gender roles”, I just want to get a job in a certain field. It shouldn’t be possible to “defy gender roles” because gender roles shouldn’t exist at all in the first place.