This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic persona. The comments contain highly specific, emotionally charged personal narratives and opinions that are consistent with the passionate and often angry perspectives found among detransitioners and desisters. The language is nuanced, varied, and reflects a consistent personal viewpoint over time.
About me
I was born female, and my desire to become a man started because I hated my body when I was heavier; it felt better to be a funny, fat boy than a girl with nothing to offer. I lived as a man for eight years, but my perspective changed when I lost weight and could finally see myself as a good-looking woman. A traumatic event and a simple moment of dressing in a skirt made me realize how happy I felt presenting as female. I stopped identifying as trans, cut ties with my old friends, and returned to living as a woman. Looking back, I used being male as an escape from self-hatred, and I deeply regret the years I lost living a life that wasn't truly mine.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition was messy and complicated, and it took me a long time to really understand why I did it in the first place.
I was born female, and I think a huge part of my wanting to be a man started with how much I hated my body when I was heavier. I had really low self-esteem. I hated the rolls of fat and the flab. But it felt so much better to think of myself as a fat boy than a fat girl. In my head, a fat boy could be funny and likeable, and people would still accept him. And I was funny. People did like me, a little bit. But as a fat girl, I felt like I had nothing to offer. Thinking of my body as male helped me feel more comfortable in the skin I was in.
I started socially transitioning when I was around 19. I cut my hair short and asked people to use a different name and he/him pronouns. This went on for about eight years. I fully believed I was a trans man. I surrounded myself with friends online and in person who were also trans, and it felt like my entire identity. We all made it our whole personality. I think I was heavily influenced online and by my friends at the time.
Then, a few things happened that started to change my perspective. The first was that I lost a significant amount of weight. When I slimmed down, my body changed. My hips didn't look so bad curved and my breasts weren't just sacks of fat hanging there anymore. For the first time, I looked in the mirror and thought I looked good. And I looked good as a woman. I didn't have to hide my shape behind the mask of being a "fat boy" anymore. I could just be a woman.
The second thing was that I was raped. It was a horrific experience, and dealing with the police and doctors was awful. But for once in my life, my mind wasn't constantly consumed with thoughts about my gender. In a really twisted way, dealing with that trauma was some of the most free I had ever felt, because my focus was forced elsewhere. It’s a horrible thing to say, but it’s true.
The final moment that made everything click was almost silly. I "dressed up" as a girl one day as a disguise to go steal some liquor without being recognized. It was just about hiding in plain sight. But after I did it and got home, I realized I felt incredibly happy. At first I thought it was just the thrill of getting away with it. But then I had to take the outfit off, and I was suddenly crushed. I realized I had genuinely liked wearing the skirt and makeup. I loved seeing the curves on my body. I loved being a girl.
That’s when I knew. I stopped identifying as trans. I just stopped messaging my old trans friends, changed my social media back to my birth name and gender, and most of them stopped talking to me on their own. The ones who didn't, I ignored. I couldn't handle dealing with that world anymore.
Looking back, I don’t think I was ever truly a man. I think I had a lot of body dysmorphia mixed up with my low self-esteem and the discomfort of going through puberty as a girl. I used the idea of being male as a form of escapism from my own self-hatred. I definitely regret transitioning. I regret the eight years I spent living a life that wasn't truly mine, and I regret the friendships I lost and the mental turmoil I put myself through. I don't regret the person I am now, because I learned from it, but I deeply regret the path I took to get here.
I now believe that my experience shows why we have to be so careful, especially with kids. Medical transition isn't reversible, not really. Even if some physical changes can go back, the mental scars are permanent. Kids are kids. They should wait until they are adults to make these huge, life-altering decisions. My story is proof that sometimes, it is just a phase, and we need to listen to detransitioners just as much as we listen to transgender people. Our experiences are important.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 19 | Started socially transitioning. Cut my hair, used a new name and he/him pronouns. |
| 27 | Lost a significant amount of weight, began to see my female body in a positive light. |
| 27 | Was raped. The ensuing trauma forced my focus away from gender issues. |
| 27 | "Dressed" as a woman as a disguise, had a moment of clarity and joy in presenting female. |
| 27 | Stopped identifying as trans, began detransitioning socially by reverting my name and pronouns online. |
| 27 | Cut ties with my previous social circle from the trans community. |
Top Comments by /u/Awkward_Stock3921:
"you cut your hair for a week"
Uh actually eight years 🤓
"You don't have to make it your whole personality"
Hate to say it, but that's transgender people. Actually, I don't hate to say it. Trans people make it their entire identity, but once we do something that will affect us (NEGATIVELY) for our whole life, then speak about the experience, were the problem.
It's just as important to hear detransitioners as it is transitioners. There's always two sides to a coin.
There are two different reasons, at least in my experience.
Someone already commented how I feel, but the first reason is why we are not taken seriously by transgender people. The second they admit they were wrong, that going down that path can permanently fuck someone up, whether physically or emotionally or both, they have to admit they're pushing too hard. That there HAS to be limits. That kids SHOULDNT be medically transitioning. We are a direct opposition just as living beings to what they want. We are proof for a counter argument. We are proof that sometimes, yes, it IS just a phase and precautions need to be taken.
For cis people, I feel there's a few different things. One, were something to be laughed at. "Look, they wanted to change their gender lol! Too much time on the internet. What a stupid fucking idiot." But we're NOT idiots, we were lead down a path we shouldn't have been. They're uncomfortable about what we've done. They want to laugh at us, because we didn't conform the same way they did, because we were confused. They see as as dumber or less worth listening to BECAUSE we were wrong about this, and for reasons beyond me, they want to just brush it aside and pretend it didn't happen. Of course, there's also the super allied people who also believe we're going against what they're preaching. It's madness.
Idk why people don't listen to us, take us seriously. The experiences and knowledge we all have of transitioning is so important. You can't have these experiences with anyone else. Trans people are never so forthcoming about their doubts. We are experiences people need to hear.
Yuuurp. I kinda just stopped messaging them, changed my socials to represent my birth gender, and most of them stopped talking to me on their own 🤷🏻♀️ the ones that didn't I just ignored because honestly I can't handle dealing with "vane gender fluid he/him pansexual" who's every post is the tiddies out
Wow this is..... Almost my exact experience.
What did it for me was, at least a big part, losing the weight. I hated myself so much when I was fatter, I hated the rolls and the flab, but it felt so much better to think of myself as a fat boy than a fat girl, to be blunt lol. If I was a fat boy, I was funny, it didn't matter, people still liked me. And I was funny. People did like me, I mean a little bit. But as a fat girl, what did I have? It just helped me to more comfortable about the body I put myself in thinking of it as male. But when I started losing it, when I slimmed down and suddenly my hips didn't look too bad curved and my boobs weren't sacks of fat hanging there. I looked, and look lol, good. And I looked good as a woman. I didn't have to hide my, let's call it, girth behind a mask of "fat boy". I could just... Live as a woman.
Another thing was (TW) I was raped in June, and, idk. Having to focus on that, and the cops, and the doctors visits, for ONCE in my life I wasn't thinking about gender. And oddly, it was some of the most free I'd ever felt in my life. Funny, isn't it?
And the final nail in the coffin was, well, I "dressed up" as a girl so I could go steal liquor and not be seen, really. Hiding in plain sight. But after I did it, when I got home, I realized I felt really, really happy. I thought it was just the successful heist, the joy of being a little criminal, but then I had to take the outfit off and I was just..... Crushed. I liked wearing a skirt, and I liked wearing makeup, and I loved the curves on my body. I loved being a girl.
They are not reversible. Do your research before trying to speak on topics as serious as this. Even if some of the physical changes can go back, others won't, and there's no getting back the mental turmoil these kids are going through. Kids are kids. If they want to transition, they can wait until they're 18. If we don't let kids smoke cigarettes then we shouldn't let them take body altering hormones on the chance they may or may not actually be trans.