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Reddit user /u/Beautifulsexybabe's Detransition Story

Detransitioned: 27
male
took hormones
regrets transitioning
escapism
trauma
depression
influenced online
got top surgery
serious health complications
now infertile
body dysmorphia
retransition
homosexual
puberty discomfort
anxiety
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.

The user's extensive, nuanced, and emotionally charged personal history with transition, detransition, and ongoing gender dysphoria is highly specific and consistent over time. The deep internal conflict, detailed accounts of medical side effects (e.g., specific hormone dosages, permanent physical changes), and the evolution of their perspective are extremely difficult to fabricate convincingly. The passion and anger expressed are consistent with the genuine trauma and stigma experienced by many detransitioners and desisters.

About me

I was born male and felt a deep discomfort with my body, which led me to take hormones on and off for years. I realized my desire to be a woman was tied to escapism and sexuality, not a true identity, and I saw the serious health risks firsthand. I had surgery to remove the breast tissue I developed and have stopped all hormones. I'm now dealing with permanent sexual dysfunction that has devastated me. Today, I'm learning to just be a man who embraces both his masculine and feminine traits without needing to medically change my body.

My detransition story

My journey with gender has been long, confusing, and honestly, really painful. I was born male, but from a young age, I felt a deep discomfort with my body and the expectations that came with being a man. I spent most of my twenties going back and forth on whether or not to transition. I hated my male form and desperately wanted a female body. That desire is still there sometimes.

A lot of my struggle came from trying to figure out who I even was. I felt like I had no solid identity. I’d question everything about myself, wondering what parts of me were real and what parts were just a performance. I think a lot of my desire to be a woman was tied up in sexuality and escapism. I was attracted to the raw masculine energy of straight men and thought life would be easier as a trans woman dating them than as a feminine gay man. I also think watching anime and being online influenced me; I started copying mannerisms from characters without even realizing it.

I did take hormones, multiple times. The first time I was 21 and only took them for ten days, but even that short period did something to my body. My libido was never the same after that. I had other rounds where I was on a high dose of estrogen and spironolactone for about a year and a half. The hormones gave me breast growth and made me feel mentally foggy and slow, like I couldn't think straight at work.

I eventually detransitioned because I realized it wasn't worth it. The health risks scared me—blood clots, bone problems, and the permanent sexual dysfunction I'm still dealing with now at 28. I also saw the reality of the trans community, which felt full of gaslighting, telling people they could become the opposite sex when they really can't. I had a relationship with a man when I was presenting as a woman, and it was awful; he was a sociopath, and it showed me the low quality of relationships that can be out there.

I got surgery to remove the breast tissue I developed from hormones. I was conflicted about it because sometimes I liked having breasts—they confused people about my gender, which gave me a bit of euphoria. But I knew that keeping them would make it harder to move on, and I was worried about the social anxiety of having to take my shirt off at a beach or pool.

I have serious regrets about taking hormones. I feel like I ruined my body and my health for a fantasy. I have erectile dysfunction that hasn't gone away even after being off hormones for three years, and it's devastating. I'm trying supplements and pelvic exercises, but I'm scared it might be permanent. My biggest piece of advice to anyone is to avoid bottom surgery at all costs. From what I've seen and heard from others, it almost always leads to regret and serious complications. It’s not a real vagina; it’s rearranged tissue that causes nothing but problems.

Now, I'm trying to just be a man, the best version of myself that I can be. I focus on the parts of my body I do like, like building a nice butt at the gym. I dress in a way that makes me happy, which is sometimes masculine with a flare, and sometimes I still put on feminine clothes and a wig. I'm trying to accept that I might just be a mix of masculine and feminine, and that's okay. I don't have to force myself into a box. The most important thing I've learned is that transition is a life of medicalization, health risks, and often loneliness. It’s not a solution to internal problems, and it doesn’t guarantee happiness.

Age Event
21 Took hormones (estrogen and spiro) for the first time (10 days). Experienced permanent drop in libido/function afterward.
21-27 Multiple on-and-off rounds of hormone therapy. Longest period was ~1.5 years on a high dose (200mg Spiro, 6/8mg Estradiol daily).
27 Stopped hormones for the final time.
27 Underwent top surgery to remove hormonally-induced breast growth.
28 Present day, still dealing with sexual dysfunction and health effects from hormone use.

Top Comments by /u/Beautifulsexybabe:

47 comments • Posting since January 29, 2024
According to the user "Beautifulsexybabe," a key reason many trans women share sexual images of themselves online is because they are male and driven by sex, a trait the user associates more strongly with males than females. The user differentiates between the sexual motivations of trans women and cisgender women by stating that, while real women can also be driven by sex, the majority of males are more strongly motivated by sexual desires. "Beautifulsexybabe" explains that AGP (autogynephilic) trans women are motivated by their sexual kinks, while HSTS (homosexual transsexual) trans women are driven by a desire to become attractive trans women and to attract men for sex. The user’s perspective is informed by their personal experience as a detrans male who grew up feeling like a woman, leading them to conclude that these sexual motivations are a key difference between trans women and cisgender women.
75 pointsOct 13, 2024
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Personally, I think it’s because they’re male and driven by sex, including myself (grew up feeling like a woman). This for me is why transwomen are not women, and it’s not that real women aren’t driven by sex either, but I think we all know it’s something that the majority of males are driven by. AGP’s are driven by their sexual kinks, and even HSTS are driven by their sexual desires to become a hot transwoman and attract men to fuck.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) comments on the similar risks of cross-sex hormones, explaining that estrogen puts males at higher risk for blood clots and embolism, while testosterone is a powerful hormone with significant inherent risks.
60 pointsFeb 25, 2024
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I’m sorry for your loss OP. Males who take estrogen are also at higher risk of blood clots and embolism, so it sounds like the risks are similar when each sex decided to take cross sex hormones. Also, T is just such a strong and powerful hormone so im not surprised with all the risks that come with it.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) explains that even a short 10-day course of hormones permanently killed their libido, warning a vulnerable MTF user that genital function may not return.
44 pointsMay 24, 2024
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I really, really don’t want to be negative because I know you’re in such a vulnerable spot right now, but I’m going to give you a spoonful of harsh truth… honestly you won’t know until time has passed.

For me, I took hormones for ten days… TEN DAYS my first time EVER, and things were never the same for me after that. It killed me Libido when I was 21 and I’m almost 28 now and it has never came back even though I stopped my final round of hormones 3 years ago.

You are one of the lucky ones if it comes back like it did before.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) discusses the gaslighting from the trans community and medical professionals who try to convince people they can become the opposite sex.
38 pointsMar 6, 2024
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That’s just fucking weird. Also off topic but I’m just so sick of the gaslighting from the trans community also. Literally will gaslight you SO FUCKING HARD to try and convince you they can become the opposite sex, and yes the doctors are playing a role in it too.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) offers advice and support to a detransitioner in Russia, sharing his own experience with long-term hormone effects and recommending testosterone, moving locations, and the possibility of reconnecting with a past partner.
29 pointsSep 30, 2024
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Hey dude,

I’m 28 and detransitioned several years ago. I still deal with effects from taking hormones to this day, and now may have to go through hormones AGAIN as part of a remedy to fix the problems they caused the first time around… so I get it.

I think you still have a shot at life tbh. The good thing is, many males who get FFS can actually still pass as male in my humble opinion. Is it possible for you to move? Honestly, move if you can, to a different town. Try to lay low from your neighbors tbh if you can. God I feel bad that you live in Russia as a transgender person, I can’t even imagine.

But as far as your love life goes? I’m so so sorry you lost your significant other in this process, but maybe… just maybe, if you’re willing to detransition you can reach out to them again and try to mend what was broken? If not, I think there are still plenty of fish out there for you. Men and women! I

Also, maybe try getting your hands on some testosterone if you want to detransition, I honestly would recommend it anyways. Being on Estrogen long term as a male is just not good for you tbh.

Some of us understand what you’re going through. I personally did not go as far as having surgery except to remove the breast tissue I grew on hormones, which I’m kind of happy I went through.

I believe it’s possible for you to resume your life as a male, it just may be a little different and you will have to depend on exogenous Testosterone for life since you did the Orchi.

Here for you dude and rooting for you, you are loved!! ❤️

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) explains that cross-sex hormones should not be administered, based on his nursing school anatomy classes, and expresses personal regret for taking them.
27 pointsMay 17, 2024
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Yes, and the trans community will gaslight you saying that this isn’t the case. I’m currently going through nursing school and this is one of the first things they taught us in anatomy classes. Cross sex hormones should not and were never supposed to be administered to the opposite sex. Even if you have one or the other flowing through your blood, you NEED the one that your body was designed for. I totally regret even taking them myself as an adult.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) advises a young detransitioning male to stop medication and start exercising to potentially regain genital growth, height, and natural male functionality.
24 pointsMar 13, 2024
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Hey, so sorry to hear about your story. I can’t imagine how I’d feel today if I transitioned at 12/13 with the horrible dysphoria I had.

Personally, I think it may be worth it. Why not? You are male and you could potentially regain growth and functionality if you start now by getting off the drugs and hitting the gym. I think you should give yourself that chance, to be what and who you ACTUALLY are. And anyone who is opposed to your decision is probably not good for you anyways. I’d say give yourself the chance.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) explains how the availability of transition care is triggering and causes him to second-guess himself, wishing it had never existed.
23 pointsMar 1, 2024
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Dude, it’s definitely triggering for me too. I too wish this shit never existed. I’d probably have so much more peace of mind knowing it wasn’t even possible even if I wanted to do it. But the fact that it’s there and so easily available… lowkey makes me second guess myself a lot sometimes but yes it’s not good for you and it’s so costly and exhausting.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) explains his decision to detransition, stating he chose to stay his birth sex and be the best version of it because life is hard and transition doesn't guarantee desired results.
23 pointsApr 16, 2024
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In a way. For me, it was just like I had to make a decision and move on. I couldn’t stay stuck always going in circles about my identity or feelings or figuring out how I was gonna make my transition work. I decided to just stay my birth sex and be the best version of it. Life is already hard enough and transition doesn’t guarantee you’ll get the result you want.

Reddit user Beautifulsexybabe (detrans male) explains why he regrets transitioning, calling it a "trap" that leads to a life of surgeries, health issues, and low-quality relationships.
22 pointsMar 15, 2024
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I’m around your age. Went back and forth on transitioning so much throughout my 20’s, even did multiple rounds of hormone therapy. One round was actually me trying to “transition”… and tbh I just wish I never did any of it. And trust me… I struggled A LOT with my decision. I would have so many days throughout my 20’s just feeling drained from weighing the pros and cons and going in circles about this stuff.

Trans is bullshit tbh. Unless you’re already well off to be able to get tons of surgery, you’re just going to be struggling. And even if you did have the money, why would you do it? You will never be a woman. You’re just going to destroy your body for a silly fantasy, and your entire life is going to revolve around you upholding this identity, this “woman” version of you…

Even if you manage to become a beautiful woman, the world will not see you as one still, and people will disrespect you. I have to second the other comment on here which said that you will have low quality men and relationships… and it’s true. The men that are interested in transwomen are usually sociopathic in nature and trash tbh. I know because I went through it and had a relationship with a sociopath and it was shitty.

I would say don’t do this to yourself. I know it’s hard because we live in a culture now where a lot of dysphoric males are transitioning, but tbh it’s a trap. It’s a life of endless surgeries and narcissism and health issues.

For me, I’ll just be a hot gay dude and go through school and become an MMA fighter. I can’t really done all that if I’m consumed with surgeries to look like a woman, and a low-quality one at that.