This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's intense focus on their personal struggle with OCD, the highly specific and consistent narrative, the emotional distress, and the lack of political or ideological grandstanding are all strong indicators of a real person sharing a genuine experience. Their story aligns with known patterns of T-OCD (Transgender OCD) and autogynephilia-related anxiety, not a scripted narrative.
About me
I'm a man, and my whole gender crisis was actually driven by my severe OCD. It started when I panicked after reading online that my childhood curiosity about women's clothes meant I must be trans. I got stuck in a terrifying loop of questioning my identity, desperately searching for certainty that I was still a man. I realized the fear wasn't about wanting to be a woman, but about the nightmare of losing my male self. Now I'm focused on treating my OCD, and I'm at peace with being the man I've always been.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender was really short and intense, and it was completely driven by my OCD. I'm a man, and I always have been, but for a while, I was convinced I might be trans and it caused me a huge amount of panic and anxiety.
It all started when my OCD latched onto things I did when I was younger, during puberty. I had explored wearing my mom's underwear, and when I later saw people online saying that kind of behavior meant you "must be trans," I completely freaked out. I couldn't find any stories from other cis men who had done the same thing, which made me believe my experience was proof that I was trans. The uncertainty was terrifying. My OCD became a 24/7 obsession, from the moment I woke up to the moment I tried to sleep, constantly questioning my gender and picking apart my past.
I learned about terms like autogynephilia (AGP), and my mind got stuck in black-and-white thinking: if I had this fetish, then I must need to transition. I was in a panicked state and didn't mean to offend anyone by linking womanhood to arousal; it was just my OCD talking. The concepts of gender euphoria and dysphoria were always abstract and confusing to me. I tried to read about them but couldn't relate, and that lack of clarity just fed my OCD more, because I desperately wanted to be certain that I was a man and not in denial.
The fear wasn't about transitioning itself; it was the fear of losing my male identity. The idea of being forced to transition and losing myself was a nightmare. After a lot of research and talking to people, I realized that transitioning is a personal choice. I knew, without a doubt, that even if I had the choice to be born female, I would still choose to be male. Growing up and growing old as a man just feels the most like "me." I really like myself the way I am.
I'm very grateful for the body I have. This entire episode was a period of intense suffering caused by OCD, not by a genuine desire to be a woman. I've come to accept that just because I imagined how a woman feels, it doesn't mean I am one. It can just be a fantasy and nothing more. I'm now trying my best to resist the compulsive need to seek reassurance and to work on treating my OCD, which is the real issue. I don't regret not transitioning; I only regret the time I lost to this anxiety.
Here is a timeline of my experience:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| During Puberty | Explored wearing my mom's underwear. |
| 23 (2023) | Developed severe OCD focused on gender identity. Began obsessively researching and fearing I was trans. |
| 23 (2023) | Realized OCD was the root cause. Accepted my identity as a man and began working on recovery. |
Top Comments by /u/Born_Paper_1939:
Sorry, I did not mean that womanhood=arousal. I did not mean to offend anyone. I was in a panicked state of OCD when I posted this. The obsession of the link between AGP and transitioning became so strong, leading me into some black and white thinking: having AGP=must perform transition.
The concept of euphoria and dysphoria are abstract and confusing to me. Even when I read the trans bible on the sub, I could not relate much to it. My OCD mind then took advantage of the abstract nature and led me into endless examination, cause I want to be certain for being a male/not being in denial.
For the arousal part, I could not decide what it means to me. However, I think it is just a fetish to me, as I cannot envision myself living as a transwoman. I really like myself as the way I am.
Thank you for your advice. It really means a lot to me.
Thank you for taking you time to read my post. I was so panic about my teenage exploration with my mom’s underwear because I barely find any cis men did the same while growing up, making me believe this experience very “trans”.
OCD kind of drove me crazy, obsessing my gender and past from the second I wake up to the moment I close my eyes. If it wasn’t the doubt, anxiety and distress from OCD(not knowing the truth, uncertain of yourself), I would not think of gender at all!
I’m very grateful for the body I have and the life comes with it. Thank you for your kind words. It means so so much for me in this suffering moment.
I certainly would not wish OCD on anyone. It’s pure suffering and destructive to oneself at all. If it wasn’t the comment on this post, I wouldn’t have know I was obsessed that deep.
Guess I will just accept the fact that just because I imagined how a woman feels, it does not mean that I am a woman. Unless I want it to mean something more than fantasy.
I think I have been reading enough information about the gender issue from different perspectives. The extra reassurance seeking will only delay my recovery.
I will try my best to take my mind off from this, and treat the real deal.
Thank you again. Your comment makes me feel less alone with OCD.
Do you mind to share your experience with me? Like what similarities did you share back then? How did you decide to transition and detransition?
If it’s too personal, I totally understand. Or you prefer to talk about it in DM?
I just want to learn more about similar experiences, and think what it means to me.
Having OCD is really a nightmare.
Before TOCD, I have never considered my gender and body that seriously. I just hope that I can be certain about I am a man, and I will forever cherish living as one. I’m now trying so hard to resist the deliberating anxiety of OCD to work on myself, which is really exhausting.
If you don’t mind me asking, I am curious to how OCD leading to your mistakes and what sexual ideation did you share?
Before the OCD, I have never pay attention to information of trans, not that I don’t know about their existence, but I just don’t think the issue is relevant to me.
After getting OCD, my obsession latched onto my behaviour during puberty. When I saw trans people said “if you have this type of behaviour, you must be trans.”. I freaked out and felt like I would be forced into transitioning. I respect other people’s choice, the fear I got is mainly the fear of losing my male identity.
After all the research and opinion I received, I know absolutely that transitioning is based on a personal choice. Even if I get the choice of being born a female, I would still much prefer living as a male. Growing up and old as a male just feels most “me”.
Thank you for your advice.