This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic actor.
The user's perspective is highly consistent, nuanced, and develops over time in a way that is characteristic of a genuine person working through complex, deeply-held beliefs. They repeatedly reference a personal journey of overcoming dysphoria through gender abolitionist philosophy, which aligns with known desister/detransitioner experiences. The language is passionate and contains personal anecdotes, self-reflection, and emotional reactions (e.g., "it makes me cringe 😭") that are difficult to fabricate consistently.
About me
I started feeling uncomfortable with my body as a teenager when I began developing breasts, and I thought that meant I wasn't really a woman. I got swept up in online communities and came to believe I was a trans man, planning to take testosterone and have surgery. I eventually realized my discomfort came from internalized misogyny and stereotypes about what a woman should be, not from my actual female body. I never medically transitioned, and I'm so glad I worked through those feelings instead. Now I'm at peace being a female who doesn't believe in gender roles, and I see that the real freedom was in changing my mind, not my body.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was a teenager, feeling like I didn't fit in with other girls. I was uncomfortable with my body, especially when I started developing breasts during puberty. I hated them and felt like they were this huge, obvious sign that I was a woman, and I didn't want to be seen that way. I had a lot of internalized misogyny and a low opinion of what it meant to be a woman. I thought it was all about stereotypes and being feminine, and since I wasn't like that, I figured I must not really be a woman.
I spent a lot of time online in communities where transitioning was presented as the solution to these feelings. I was influenced by friends and people I followed who were all identifying as something other than their sex, and it made me feel like that was the right path for me too. I started to believe I was non-binary, and then later, that I was a trans man. I thought taking testosterone and getting top surgery would finally make me feel like myself.
But the more I thought about it, and the deeper I got into these online spaces, the more I started to see a problem. The whole idea of "gender identity" seemed to rely on defining "woman" and "man" by stereotypes and regressive gender roles. It felt like we were just building more boxes to put people in instead of tearing the old ones down. I realized that my dysphoria was coming from my belief that womanhood was something I had to fit into, rather than just a neutral fact about my body. I am a human who happens to be female; that's it. It doesn't dictate my personality, my interests, or how I should act.
I never ended up taking hormones or having surgery. I'm so glad I didn't, because I was able to work through my feelings without making permanent changes to my body. I recovered from my sex dysphoria by becoming a gender abolitionist. I realized that the social construct of gender isn't real, and there's no such thing as a "woman brain." Being female has no bearing on who I am as a person. Once I stopped attributing all these stereotypes to my biology, I felt at peace with it.
I do have some regrets about the whole process. I regret the years I spent hating my body and thinking there was something wrong with me for not being feminine. I regret the internalized misogyny I had and the way I used to look at other women. I cringe now thinking about how I used to generalize them because I felt like I didn't belong. I also regret getting so swept up in online communities without thinking more critically about the ideology.
Now, I see myself as a female who is bisexual. I don't believe in gender roles. I think we should be able to just be people, without all these labels and boxes. My experience showed me that the pressure to transition can come from a place of misunderstanding what it means to be a man or a woman. For me, the answer wasn't to change my body, but to change my mind.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 13 | Started puberty; began to feel intense discomfort with my developing breasts and being seen as a woman. |
| 15-16 | Spent significant time online; was influenced by friends and communities into identifying first as non-binary, then as a trans man. |
| 17 | Seriously considered taking testosterone and getting top surgery. |
| 18 | Began to critically examine gender ideology; realized my dysphoria was linked to internalized misogyny and stereotypes. |
| 19 | Stopped identifying as trans; embraced being a gender non-conforming female and a gender abolitionist. |
| 20 | Felt fully at peace with my body and my sex; considered myself recovered from sex dysphoria. |
Top Comments by /u/Comfortable_Ear1446:
my favourite part about jk rowling haters is that ive met a lot of them that love fnaf. scott cawthon is a conservative trump supporter, as well as actually homophobic and transphobic, and nobody bats an eye. jk rowling said female spaces are important and now even googling harry potter makes you a nazi. the cognitive dissonance is crazy
gender roles arent real. being female is. the idea that "womanhood", a word created to encompass the broad experience of being a human female, is a specific, definable experience one must attain in order to be considered a woman is deeply misogynistic. it is definied by you. try looking at r/forthwavewomen
i find it really alienating... a lot of them have misogynistic and often homophobic views in the name of upholding socially constructed gender, so its difficult not to find it offputting when you see everyone in a community agreeing with it uncritically. it doesnt help when every other person has a line telling people like you to **** ******** in their carrd 😭😭 its disheartening how often i hear my gender-supporting friends say things that are extremely misogynistic or regressive, and i know they have heavily internalized gender roles, but i cant point it out because it might out me as gender critical. id love to make friends with more people like me to get away from it all. im hoping we can carve out a space of our own one day.
i am critical of it because, in order to justify its existence, you need to define woman and man as stereotypes/regressive gender roles rather than neutral physical characteristics. you need to say "i am not a woman because i dont adhere to this" instead of "i am a woman and i dont adhere to this". all it does is build off of conservative ideals of gender. im a gender abolitionist and consider this a very harmful solution to the issue of restrictive gender. rather than adding more boxes, we should be removing the walls of the already existing boxes.
especially considering that, and i know this is an uncomfortable subject for people, trans women statistically have the same crime pattern as regular men. meaning as a woman, you are just as likely to be assaulted by a trans woman as you are by any other male. of course this information doesnt really suit the agenda so it gets completely overlooked in the name of inclusivity.
what does taking something "to be yourself" mean for you? i found the best way to manage (and even largely recover from) dysphoria was to stop believing in gender in the first place. its a made up social construct and is not inherent to humans. the one and only thing that makes me a woman is being female. it has nothing to do with who i am as a person and i can be as masculine as i please. i think gender non-conformity is super underrated
i understand respecting other peoples views but to an extent a lot of these people are really misogynistic, homophobic, and have heavily internalized gender roles. its perfectly understandable to not want to comply with that or respect a way of thinking that is regressive
you are a female homosexual, which is what the word lesbian refers to. "lesbian" is not a role to fit into, it is just a word to describe your material reality. dont let anyone say anything about it and dont worry about if people will "accept" you for what you simply are. im sure you can find someone who will be interested in you, and i have definitely seen lesbians date other women who have taken/still are taking hormones. cant speak for lesbians myself because im bisexual but i definitely wouldnt mind. wish you the best.
what do you think being "just" a woman means? do you believe that being a woman has any bearing on who you are as a person? i just ask because as a gender abolitionist, i think that defining man/woman by their respective social roles is a very regressive way of thinking. you can be any level of feminine or masculine or anything at all and be a woman. its a completely neutral characteristic. this is just something to think about. in my case, my dysphoria was heavily related to my internal misogyny and my belief that womanhood was something to attain and fit into, as opposed to a broad term meant to describe anything at all that i could be or experience. i feel like this isnt talked about enough.
you are so right honestly. the issue with gender ideology is that it requires defining men and women by their respective stereotypes and gender roles, and building off of that. the more we normalize this, the more being a woman becomes "i identify with feminine gender roles" and less "i am a human that happens to be female". it implies that social roles that are forced onto us are INTRINSIC to being female, and if we dont fit into them there is something wrong with us. i really do think my generation has regressed so much in terms of true progressivism and especially feminism. :/