This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's perspective is highly specific, emotionally charged, and internally consistent, reflecting a personal and deeply-held belief system common among some detransitioners. The language is nuanced, uses personal anecdote, and engages with complex, controversial topics in a way that is characteristic of a real, passionate individual.
About me
I felt so insecure about being a man that I started to believe I wasn't one, influenced a lot by sexualized online spaces. I tried hormones to escape, but they just made me feel like a chemically castrated male, and I lost important parts of my sexuality. I realized I was trying to win a rigged game against my own male body. I stopped the hormones and began to appreciate my strength and masculinity instead of running from it. While I regret the physical changes, I'm now focused on living as a man and understanding that my journey was more about escapism than a true identity.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I felt like I couldn't fit into the masculine box. I saw other guys who were naturally feminine and comfortable with it, but for me, trying to be a man felt too hard. I felt insecure and started to believe that maybe I wasn't a man at all. A lot of this was influenced by what I saw online, especially in sexualized spaces that focused on "femboys." I think I was using this identity as a form of escapism from the pressures of masculinity. I had a lot of anxiety and low self-esteem, and I started to sexualize the idea of being feminine.
I decided to start taking hormones. At first, it felt good to step away from being a "man." But that feeling didn't last. I realized I was losing important parts of myself. The hormones killed my libido and gave me weak orgasms. Some people online said that was a good thing, like being freed from desire, but to me, it felt like I was giving up. I felt like a chemically castrated male, not a woman. I started to see that trying to look like a woman was a rigged game I was destined to lose. My bone structure was still male, and no amount of hormones could change that foundation.
I also became really concerned about the future. I saw these young guys identifying as "femboys" and wondered what they would do when they got older and no longer looked like teenage boys. I realized I was walking into a trap, thinking I could be a permanent boy. I was a grown adult male—a man—and I needed to face that.
After years on HRT, I got tired of it. I stopped enjoying trying to look androgynous or like a hyperfeminine male. I started to focus on the positive aspects of being male instead of the things I hated. I began to appreciate my physical strength, my sexual energy, and the legacy of leadership that comes with being a man. I stopped taking hormones and began to accept my masculinity. I now enjoy being attractive in a masculine way.
I do have some regrets about my transition. I think I was influenced by online communities and my own internal struggles, not by a genuine, innate identity. I was running away from being a man instead of confronting my insecurities. While I think transition is right for some people, like a very feminine friend of mine who had surgery, I know it wasn't right for me. My journey was more about a porn problem and escapism than a true gender identity. I don't regret transitioning in the sense that I learned a lot about myself, but I regret the physical changes and the time I lost.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Late Teens | Felt insecure in masculinity, influenced by online "femboy" content. Began to sexualize femininity as escapism. |
| Early 20s | Started taking hormones (HRT). Initially felt relief from the pressure of being a man. |
| Mid 20s | Experienced negative effects of HRT: low libido, weak orgasms. Realized I was losing parts of myself. |
| 26 | Stopped HRT. Began to accept my male body and appreciate masculinity. |
| 27 (Now) | Living as a man, focusing on positive male experiences. Regret the physical effects of HRT but value the self-knowledge gained. |
Top Comments by /u/Complete_Light83:
I think taking yourself out of the category of "man" can feel good initially. Until you realize what you are losing.
I am personally concerned by all the people identifying as "femboys". If these guys feel this way because they have a strong natural affinity for feminine spectrum things, similar to feminine gays, then I think it can be ok. After all we all know certain gay boys that are very effeminate and thats just the way they are.
But it seems to me there is also a large cohort that identifies this way because they feel being a man is too hard, feel insecure in their masculinity, often sexualize it, and are trying to play hardball with gender, ie. I am not an "ideal" masculine man, so I am going to go hard in the other direction and focus on femininity. That to me, seems like mental illness.
I am also concerned because "femboy" seems to be very sexualized. If you search this term on reddit you just get a bunch of content that feels more like male emasculation fantasy rather than males simply being feminine. It appears very sexual. Anyone who is lead down this path by porn or sexual fantasy.... rather than a nature femininity that was present in childhood.... is in deep deep trouble in my opinion and are dealing with pathologies related to the male sex drive, rather than a "gender identity".
I got tired of trying to fit into the feminine box, and realized after years of hrt that trying to look like a woman is a rigged game that you are destined to lose and regret. And I also stopped enjoying looking "androgynous" or looking like a hyperfeminine male. I now enjoy my masculinity and being attractive in a masculine way.
I am confused about what "Femboys" think they will do when they are 30+ and no longer look like teenage boys. And the trap you are walking into is thinking that by taking hrt you can be a 30 year old femboy... sure hrt does stuff, but at that age you are not a BOY, you are a grown adult... human male... in other words a man.
To me femboy is an sexual identity similar to females who want to be "bratty girls" and have sexual kinks related to immaturity and regression.
Final thought, get ready for a lack of libido, decreased sexual drive, and weak orgasms. If you say this on a trans sub many agps will pop in and say "oh I was so happy for that, before I was a slave to my desires, now I am at peace". Sorry, but to me, being a chemically castrated male is not being at "peace", it is giving up and losing to the fetish.
Now after saying all that, I think transition is right for certain people, I have a friend who went all the way many years ago, and they are still full of sadness, but I do think their identity was very weighted towards femininity and female and they do enjoy/feel comfort having a neovagina and whatnot. But I don't think you are like her at all. And neither am I.
Why don't you focus less on things you hate about being male, and instead focus on positive experiences of being male.
Personally as a man I feel physically powerful, I feel I have intense sexual energy that if things line up can translate into experiences full of charisma and passion, I have the legacy of leadership, yes expectation, but with expectations comes the challenge of life. I have the past, men who went off to war, who in some instances participate in extreme violence but in others channel that into extreme bravery, or great accomplishments that seemingly only the near-suicidal drive that males have been given through evolution can produce.
Is life just about pleasure, about sitting around being soft, being taken care of.
You can choose what context you put yourself into. How you contextualize your experiences as a male. But frankly, and I don't say this to be mean, but to be honest, as a trans you aren't really escaping being male, you are just choosing to be a different kind of male, one that is very looked down upon. You aren't going to be a real woman. Unless you are very very homosexual and effeminate or you have an inconsolable agp sexual fixation, I don't see a good argument for transition.
You are complaining of gender roles, but you never mentioned sex, and in my experience sexuality is always heavily involved in a MtF transition, one war or another
I live in the US and have spend a few months Europe, during my trans period.
All the harassing comments I received were from brown (muslim types) and black people. Granted, a minority of a minority. And granted, it probably happened less than 20 times over a few years.
But if you only paid attention to the internet, you would think all the trans bashing and harassing is done by Stephen Crowder clones
You are ground zero!
But hey you are only 17, time to get grounded and define what is fantasy for you and what is really you. Sometimes who we are isn't that special or fancy, sometimes its very basic. Humans are just evolved animals afterall!
-guys opinion
Well you are having an identity crisis.
Have you considered that the "way you look" is actually not that much under your control, regardless of whether you transition or not. Most of your body and your look will not change regardless of HRT or FFS. By that I mean your skeleton is not going to change. Bones pretty much determine everything on top of them. You can get surgeries or whatever, but your foundation will not be changed, its something you are born with.
Now if you really feel your life needs to be as close to a womans as it can, then maybe transition is the right choice. If you are running away from some horror you conjured in your head about what you look like as a man... I dont know if that is the right motivation for the long term (this is for your entire life, right?)
Are you a virgin? I feel bad that you are having this identity crisis without even having done something basic like fuck another human.
Have you ever considered that you have a very extremist perspective....?
Btw pretty much all girls would prefer a generic monkey man too a chemically castrated femboy with pretty skin and a shrunken dick so.... you may need to rethink what is "attractive" and what is not.
I don't say this to be mean.