Do people like realise some stuff was written centuries ago when world was different? Heck even 50 years ago it was totally different. It’s also that they complete miss the setting described in book.

Speaking of difficult books in my country we read such books at school and talk about it, about how world was long time ago. Slavery present in the story? We talk about it, how it happened, why it happened. We don’t flame the author of such book just because he described reality of his times.

Speaking as one that fortunately found this sub early enough not to do anything stupid: depends. Some may be too deep in the bubble of the group that praises mutilating your body. Too deep in thinking they are doing good and found the magical solution to all of their problems. That if you’re against it that you’re the hater, the -phobe or whatever else. They may be blind. Other? Idk sometimes I think it’s people from trans sub that just come here to spew hate and make troll posts. The kind that shouts about tolerance but they are unable to do so themselves.

Other another like me, may be questioning the idea to pursue the change. I had many questions if it’s safe, if it doesn’t have major side effects, if it will indeed change anything. I am glad that you guys speak up here so I could clear my view. Because the answer is no to all of my questions. It wouldn’t change shit for me, a biological neurodiverse woman who doesn’t fit neither the women stereotypes, nor (obviously) the men ones. Because of posts here I just decided to be an oddball, but an oddball that is physically healthy and tries to just be itself in the world. The psychological aspect is the different one, I still haven’t come to terms with some things but I’m trying.

You cleared out to me that it won’t matter what will I present at because life will be going anyway. That it won’t change shit about who I really am aside of gender. Because a person is more that how they look and what they have in their pants. And I really wish that one’s who are also in that limbo of questioning their gender will see the same thing!

They avoid events and host smaller ones among friends, invite only. And least this is how it works in my friend circle. Before we invite someone we have to get to know them and filter out any toxic or creepy people.

Most of us met during small queer kink events but eventually most of cis and normal trans people started feeling overwhelmed by „the loud crowd”. By the end of this groups life it was fully acceptable to make biphobic and lesbianphobic (it was ALWAYS towards lesbians, never towards gays this is why I’m not using „homophobic” in this sentence). We couldn’t talk about our struggles because always some „loud crowd” person jumped in and belittled our struggles. Many of them were super toxic, even while playing a damn tabletop game they must’ve started complaining about how no one wants them and how transphobic it is and how cis lesbians bad. And instead of working on themselves as a person they blamed it all on transphobia. Yeah, it’s not how it works. The comments about cis people started, that they come to these events to fetishize trans people (because they totally didn’t fetishize me as bi woman…) and eventually everything broke apart. Cis queers and trans folk who was opposed to this stayed together, and we went no contact with the toxic ones even on major events. Word got spread, some of them were even banned from certain groups/events for their super creepy comments about cis women or young guys.

Where is problem? There’s more toxic ones than good people here.

I am still here! I am that tomboy working in IT, playing games and 3D printing as a hobby.

As controversial as it sounds I’m kinda glad I grew up in a country where no one really talked about gender/trans stuff until recently. I first found topic in English side of internet and sadly for some time I was questioning my own identity but thanks to my friends I realised being tomboy is dope and I do not need to change myself to fit the box. I wear stuff from men’s section of clothing store, never wore high heels and I hate make up with passion. There’s no law saying I need to love it!

Today I am trying to break a stereotype that woman need to be feminine, wear make up and work “girly” job. I volunteer in local Women In Tech, soon I’ll be mentoring teenage girls, encouraging them to follow their passion, maybe do some nerdy projects with them if that will be their wish. I want to inspire next generation that whatever they were born as, they can do whatever they want, wear whatever they want and still call themselves themselves. Hey, it’s 2023 we shouldn’t promote gender roles from 50s and say shit that STEM is not for women!

One’s freedom ends where next person freedom starts. These nutwhacks cannot grasp that and try to force everyone around to cater to their own fantasy. It’s funny where two of them scream at each other calling names and try to force other one to budge. But this is reason I avoid any lgbt space. They already invalidated me on every level possible. Me being bi, me being autistic, me being woman, me questioning own identity, I’m just fucking tired of them. Like literally just because I exist I need to be belittled or straight up ridiculed or erased. Just avoid them whenever you can. I met only one sane trans person that just tries to live their own life peacefully, I’m still friends with them.

When it comes to being female and having male version of autism yeah it sucks. I always was only girl in boy groups, still am to this day even at work. I only have two female friends I can openly talk about women stuff and casually complain about such things. It sucks. This was also one of main reasons for me to start considering transition. In the end I do not want to do any modifications to my body but I am still a mess when it comes to who or what am I. I mask to the point I don’t know my true self. Happens, but i don’t have any advice on that since I still haven’t figured that out on my own. Only thing I did that most of people are assholes and you should stay away from them as much as possible, and share as little info as needed for situation because they’ll either invalidate you or try to stab you in your back using these. Hence also my nickname 🤷‍♀️

Sometimes I wonder how many trans people are actually addicted to cosmetic surgeries or have body dysphoria related only to their physical appearance rather than gender related things. It was never supposed to be about just being “beautiful man/woman”, it was about being man/woman. Like cis people aren’t always aligned with beauty standards the crowd sets, not all of them look like instagram models.

Sometimes it also look like there’s some effing competition, and this stupid argument of some trans people: “I’m better man/woman than you are”. Like wtf are you like 5 year old to boast about something like this?

Because they don’t want to listen :/ My first post here after few months of lurking and helping myself, was how to help a friend that is in shitty situation when it comes to transition. Nothing sadly changed.

That person despises manhood and fantasies, idealises womanhood based on stereotypes. They do not realise what exactly womanhood comes with. Both the society view and treatment of woman in specific places and the physical aspect of hormonal changes. Something that resembles PMS? They think it will go away once they fully transition. Emotional changes? They do not realise what estrogen even in cis woman can do to you in some cases. They already are emotionally unstable, most likely undiagnosed bipolar or untreated depresso. Ofc they are not under care of good psychiatrist and/or therapist. They dropped therapist as soon as topic of dysphoria was touched. They believe transitioning to woman will solve all their problems and they’ll finally be happy. Ofc there’s childhood trauma involved but transition is not the way to solve it! I don’t touch the topic myself, because I know how they react to any single word of criticism or advice. Like I know what womanhood comes with, I was born a woman. Listening to them sometimes my jaw drops because what they sometimes say is kinda taken from not how girls work. It’s harmful. It’s sad. And the worst is I know I can’t help them. I can’t help them understand danger coming from HRT or the surgeries they plan. They saved up $15k to go to Spain for bottom surgery (in my country it is not available, top surgery only for medical reasons like cancer). They are sure it will be like getting a real vagina… They don’t want to read about what can get wrong and what side effects may occur. Literally they do not want to. If we even ask if they’re sure and they realise risk they get offended and think we maliciously want to prevent them from being happy.

I have feeling it will end up really bad. I know they will be disappointed after transition because what they imagined will not be true. Their life outside trans stuff is not in the best situation. But what can I do when they don’t want to listen as long as it’s not praising them and telling them how happy we are for them?

In the same time apparently you can’t be queer and hate pride. Yes I hate pride month/parades/whatever because I feel it’s infantilizing and cringy but also that it does not represent full lgbt community (mostly because of internal conflicts in this community). And apparently I’m a fascist right-winger for hating it.

Like why would I support it? I don’t need more „representation”. No one here will kill me for having a same gender partner, marriage here is overrated anyway. There’s no laws preventing me to be in relationships with whoever I want and even cishet couples sometimes deal with someone who doesn’t approve of their choice of partner for whatever reason. You can’t shut up everyone or turn world into utopia.
Like someone said here not giving a fuck is the highest form of acceptance. And this is exactly what I want - for people not to give a fuck that I’m bisexual. Just treat me like any other average human being and I’ll be happy. Same applies for being disabled. I am not a mythical creature to show around, I just want to be treated like a person and nothing above that.

In both of my „victim categories” I feel like a thing to be shown around to mark that diversity and inclusion. This is why I hate/cringe on most of these diversity and inclusion events or programs. Because it’s just showing off

Like taking any controlled substances bought online instead in proper pharmacy is stupid idea. Without doctors advice? Even stupider. Not just hormones but literally anything. It’s easy way to harm yourself. From overloading your organs to death. You don’t know if it’s what it says it is, you don’t know if it’s not contaminated, you don’t know if it’s not purposefully laced with some shit (remember lacing tylenol with poison? This is why we have these secure caps now). Anyone who assures people it’s the good way to do things should burn in hell. I’m not catholic but seriously if hell exists these people should go there for helping other harm themselves in the name of what?

No no no no no. Im bi and I’m attracted to two existing genders. Bi - two, like in two genders. Most of these fluid lovers call themselves pansexual anyway. From what I see LGB is flying away anyway.

I stopped interacting with any „queer” crowd after local one started talking that there’s no such thing as bi, that it’s just excuse to go to sapphic events (organized in my city) to fuck transgender women, that were something phobic because most of us supposedly don’t accept trans people etc etc. In the internet sometimes I see similar bullshit. The more I heard the more I prefer to stay away from that circus.