This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's comments show:
- Internal Consistency: They express a complex, nuanced, and deeply personal perspective that evolves through conversation, which is difficult to fake.
- Specific, Plausible Details: They share specific, non-cliché details about their life (e.g., being a teacher, a musician, their surgical experience, living as a woman for 17 years).
- Emotional Complexity: Their tone ranges from analytical to vulnerable to frustrated, reflecting the "passionate and pissed off" nature of someone who has experienced significant personal harm and social stigma.
The account presents as a long-term transsexual individual who is now critically re-evaluating their identity and the broader transgender movement, which is a legitimate and documented perspective within the detrans/desister community.
About me
I transitioned from male to female 17 years ago to relieve a severe physical dysphoria that felt like a neurological mismatch, and the medical steps did save my life. Now, I feel trapped by the negative reputation of the trans community and no longer relate to the idea of "feeling like a woman." I am a man who has lived as a woman, and I'm considering socially detransitioning because I'm tired of the stigma and would rather be seen as an honest, eccentric man. My body is permanently altered and requires hormones for life, so medically my path is fixed. Ultimately, I just want to be judged as a human being, free from these ideological labels.
My detransition story
My journey with this has been long and complicated, and I’m still figuring things out. I’ve lived my life as a woman for about 17 years now, but I’ve reached a point where I feel like I need to be honest about my past. The main reason I’m thinking about this is the reputation damage that comes with being associated with transgender ideology today. I’m tired of feeling like my moral character is questioned just because of my medical history. People now associate trans people with pronoun policing, invading women's sports, and even child grooming, and I hate being lumped in with that.
I don’t really know what "feeling like a girl" even means. The only time I feel like a woman is in a negative way, when I’m confronted with misogyny. My gender identity is just… human being. I see myself as a woman, but that’s because I relate to other women and I like androgynous women’s fashion. The truth is, biology doesn’t lie. I am a man who presents as a woman. If I were to socially detransition, the world would see that as more authentic, and honestly, part of me agrees with them. Who cares what feels authentic to me? I might be delusional. Changing my presentation doesn’t change my personality; it just changes the packaging.
I experienced what I believe is real sex dysphoria. For me, it was a constant, physical sensation, like a neurological problem. I compare it to tinnitus or phantom limb syndrome—a relentless feeling that my body’s map in my brain didn’t match my physical reality. Puberty made it so much worse. Medical transition did help me with that. I went from frequent psychiatric hospitalizations due to suicide attempts to being a happy, productive member of society. So in that sense, I don’t regret the medical part for my own well-being. But I think my case is rare.
I had surgery a long time ago. The hormone therapy was fully informed consent, but the surgery wasn't. I wish the surgeon had explained everything he was going to do beforehand. After the fact, he told me, "surprise! I made some cool stuff, you have a g-spot now too and you can get wet!" It was cool, but it showed me I had no say in the matter. I even have some surgery regret from a follow-up surgery where I feel he reduced my labia too much. I don’t like how my vulva looks now; it feels too exposed.
Passing is a strange thing. It’s not an on/off switch. It’s situational, and that can cause a lot of paranoia. Sometimes I think I don’t pass, but when I disclose to people, they accuse me of lying. Once, I tried to prove I was biologically male using my voice, and the person said I sounded "like a woman emulating a male teenager." So I’m not deluded enough to think I pass 100%. The idea of going deep stealth is appealing, but it feels harder now that people are more aware of trans people.
I’ve become very critical of the trans community and the ideology. I left when I saw them excuse a violent incident where a man with a beard, identifying as a trans woman, punched a lesbian and broke her jaw at a party. The community called it "self-defense against transphobia" and blamed the victim for going to the police. I think that’s insane. This kind of ideology is fuel for the extreme right, and it scares me. I’ve seen lifelong social democrats switch to a fascist party over fears of "wokeism."
I believe transition care needs more gatekeeping, not less. It should be treated like euthanasia—a serious, last-resort option with a high burden of proof. The requirement should be severe, lifelong sex dysphoria, not a desire to fit into gender stereotypes. Gender is oppressive bullshit anyway. A lot of people transitioning now, especially those with Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria or autogynephilia, don’t seem to have their quality of life improved. I’ve seen guys go from happy, married lives to being miserable, unemployed online activists.
I’m now considering socially detransitioning. There’s a freedom in taking away the power of others to call me a female impersonator or a liar. If I admit I’m a man, then no one can accuse me of deception. I’d rather be seen as a fruity guy than as a trans woman with all the negative baggage. I’ve started talking to close friends about it, but they dismiss it. They say they see me as a woman and can’t fathom me as a male. They’re supportive, but I think they’re biased.
My body doesn’t produce sex hormones anymore, so I will be a lifelong patient regardless. The only difference would be whether I take estrogen or testosterone. Not taking anything would guarantee osteoporosis. So medically, I’m stuck. But socially, I feel a need to find a path of least resistance, to be judged for the content of my character rather than a label.
Here is a timeline of the major events as I remember them:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Late Teens | Realized I had severe sex dysphoria; it felt like a constant, physical mismatch. |
| Early 20s | Started hormone therapy through an informed consent model. |
| Mid 20s | Underwent gender-affirming surgery. My body stopped producing natural sex hormones. |
| Mid 20s | Had a follow-up surgery that I now have some regrets about regarding the aesthetic result. |
| For ~17 years | Have lived my life socially as a woman. |
| Now (40s?) | Seriously considering social detransition to alleviate the stress and stigma of being associated with modern trans activism. |
Top Comments by /u/CurledUpWallStaring:
People sometimes think autogynephilia/autohomoeroricism is innate or something. Of course not, it is learned behavior and porn is a big driving force in that.
Same with the "sex work is work" stuff, it's just sacrificing others to be able to feed the addiction. Drug addicts tend to be in favour of complete legalisation of drugs as well, but not for any serious political reasons either.
I ran away from the trans community when I couldn't bite my tongue anymore after a ridiculous incident. A dude with a beard identifying as a trans woman punched a lesbian woman in the face and broke her jaw at a "queer- and trans party". Why? Because she "misgendered" him. The community excused it because this was "self defense against the systemic violence of transphobia" according to them and they blamed the victim for going to the police. Because "ACAB and they are a death squad for Q&TWOC". I think these people are batshit insane, the police in my safe European country are not executing black people left and right. You're neck deep in American woke ideology.
What counts as transphobia though? Because I feel that word had lost all meaning by now.
Not trying to sealion btw, I'm genuinely not sure anymore where the line is. Some things are obviously transphobic, but a lot of things get called transphobic that I regard as vital to furthering the emancipation of trans people. Like a sort of upside down world.
I'm pretty sure in my country trans people are banned from working in the gender clinic, due to conflict of interest. This is exactly why I believe that's necessary and not employment discrimination.
Hopefully you can recover OP, I wish you the best in your journey of healing!
I don't know, the message is okay, the appeal to get the culture war out of healthcare (in general too, hello abortion rights! and all that) I like. But it feels a bit like a call to ceasefire while their own tanks are still rolling forward. This doctor is clearly an ideologue and I don't exactly get the feeling that he would apply a call for nuance to his own perspective like he calls others to do now.
That's the problem if your narrative is "what I do is saving the lives and defending the rights of the most vulnerable and anyone else is a literal nazi". You cannot appeal to nuance if that's your position.
(And some opponents to his position are indeed literal nazis, but that goes for about everything! Nazis are also a part of the animal rights conversation, does that mean we oppose any anti animal cruelty legislation too? Hell no!)
Nope, I think GNC people rock. Only thing I think people sometimes are confused about is that gender is not just fashion and such. So when I see a male wearing feminine attire, but acting really dominant and misogynistic I instantly regard him as gender conforming.
It's sex stereotypes, that's mostly it. I do believe that a disorder exists that causes the brain to have the wrong bodymap of the sexed body, but that's much more rare than what we see now with all these transgenderist identifies popping up.
From what it sounds like you have internalised some sex stereotypes too, which can cause transgender identity. If you believe being a man = bad, violent, oppressive and that's the basis of wanting to transition: that's a problem. For all the feminism in the world we have to remember that man = bad is just behavior, man can behave bad, they aren't bad at the core. That behavior is caused by how we - as a culture under patriarchy - raise boys, which is where the stereotype of domineering and violent come from.
You can be a good man, soft, gentle, frilly, all these things. It doesn't mean you have to transition or are not a man at all.
And when you ask why you get stereotypes as an answer. "I never wanted to wear dresses, I hated pink..." Ugh, I'm technically a transsex woman but girl, neither do I! Guess I did transition wrong.
I've been trans for quite a long time now and I've encountered a lot from the trans community, but at this point I'm just gonna say it: most are lying. "I always felt like this ever since I was a child" is the lie they tell, because those are the magic words to get HRT at the gender clinic.
Because the gender clinics look at GENDER, not at sex. This is also why I want a change in that regard. The requirement should be sex dysphoria, not bullshit gender, because gender changes with culture all the time. You shouldn't be permanently changing your body over something unpermanent as that.
And yes, ugly as all hell, but also simply wrong lore-wise.
I have no idea, I just hope the ideology collapses soon. I clearly see how this is the fuel that empowers the extreme right. If that train runs all the way to the end station detransitioners will not be spared the death camps.
Sounds hyperbolic, but I really believe this. It is very very obvious that this + the immigration crisis in a lot of western countries is the number 1 recruitment tool of the extreme right. I have seen lifelong social democrats switch to a fascist party over fears of wokeism. A party that has won our national election and is still rising in the polls.
So yeah, let's hope for lawsuits and medical scandal, because that's a civil society kind of resolution.
For sure, it makes it so obvious what's happening. The other side too: point for point they copy the right wing side of the USA culture war. What the fuck are we doing? Our culture is entirely different, you're only importing the war part of the culture war!
Our culture is bitchin' about the weather, compromise, not doing anything that sets us apart and eating fucking cheese, my dude.