This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's narrative is highly personal, emotionally nuanced, and internally consistent. They describe specific physical experiences (bruised ribs from binding, voice changes from a short T regimen), complex emotional reasoning, and a clear, evolving perspective that aligns with common desister/detransitioner experiences, including frustration with external pressure and a rejection of rigid gender boxes. The passion and defensiveness present are consistent with someone who has experienced real harm.
About me
I grew up in a traditional home where I felt pressured to be a certain kind of girl, and that discomfort led me to believe I was a trans man. I was influenced online and started testosterone at 19, but I stopped after five months when I realized it wasn't right for me. I'm now learning to accept myself as an androgynous woman and exploring my attraction to women. I regret rushing into things and hurting my body by binding too tightly. My journey has taught me that there is no one way to be a woman, and I'm finally trying to be kind to myself.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I grew up in a really traditional household, and there was a huge emphasis on what girls and boys were supposed to be and how they were supposed to act. I was a tomboy and I hated it. I just wanted to wear comfortable clothes, but I got into so many fights with my family over not wanting to wear dresses. Other girls would make comments too, like "you're strong for a girl" or "why are your hands so big?" I felt like I didn't fit into the box everyone was trying to put me in.
I think that discomfort with puberty and the pressure from everyone around me made me really confused. I started to think that if I hated the "girl box" so much, maybe I was supposed to be in the "boy box" instead. My brain just went straight to "ok, I'll head over to the boys box!" instead of realizing I could just be myself, an androgynous woman, and that was okay.
I didn't have a therapist to talk to about all these complex feelings, so I started venting online. Almost immediately, people told me that what I was describing sounded like I was a trans man. It felt like the internet diagnosed me. I got influenced online and by friends in those spaces, and I started to believe that was the answer.
So, when I was 19, I started taking testosterone. I was on it for about five months. A lot changed in that short time, especially my voice. I enjoyed parts of living as a man, mainly because I felt more carefree in a way, but I also hid my body out of shame. I bound my chest so often that I bruised my ribs. I really wanted top surgery at one point; I hated my breasts that much.
But then I started to realize it wasn't right for me. The realization hit me pretty suddenly. I just woke up one day and knew I was wrong. I stopped the hormones. I'm closer to desisting than detransitioning because I wasn't on T for very long, and a lot of the changes, like my voice, have gradually faded since I stopped.
Letting my body breathe now, I feel more alive. I'm learning that you can be cool and androgynous as a woman. People can second-guess what you are and you can still be a woman. You can be respected and be anything you want as a woman. I'm exploring my attraction to women now and thinking I might just be an androgynous lesbian.
I do have some regrets. I regret rushing into taking testosterone. I wish I had never bound my chest so aggressively that I hurt myself. I regret that I let online influences and internalized ideas about what a woman should be push me into something that wasn't right for me. If my family and the people around me had just let me express myself how I wanted, I think I would have had a much less intense and painful relationship with my gender.
Even though I've detransitioned, I still have complicated feelings. If there was a button I could press that would make me male, I’d press it in a heartbeat. I think that feeling comes from a deep-seated discomfort with the rigid boxes society puts us in. But I'm making peace with the fact that it just wasn't meant to happen. There are perks to being a girl, and I'm trying to focus on that.
My main advice to anyone is to never rush into surgical stuff, ever. Your health and your body's well-being have to be your first priority. Be true and kind to yourself. You don't have to force yourself to be hyper-feminine or hyper-masculine. There is no one way to be a woman.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 13-17 | Experienced significant puberty discomfort and social pressure to conform to feminine norms. Fought with family over clothing. |
| 19 | Started taking testosterone. |
| 19 | Stopped testosterone after 5 months. Realized living as a man wasn't right for me and began to desist. |
| 20 | Now exploring life as an androgynous woman and my attraction to women. |
Top Comments by /u/Cute_Ship_5614:
Same here. Despite detransitioning if there was a button that’d make me a male i’d press it in a heartbeat. It just wasn’t meant to happen this lifetime haha
It’s okay, i’m making peace with it, there are perks to being a girl… like fucking other girls lmao
The thing is i’m on the same boat. My voice passes as male but some of my relatives say it can pass as raspy female. And i enjoyed the time spent as a man too lol. Mainly cause i felt so carefree. But also not really cause i hid my body out of shame. And binded so often my ribs bruised. I feel more alive now letting my body breathe. All the advice i can give is what others have told me. NEVER rush into surgical stuff ever. And be true and kind to yourself and your body. I am learning now that you can be cool AND androgynous as a woman! You can have people second guess what you are at first and still be a woman. And you can be cool and respected and basically anything you want as a woman. I’m on the same boat of questioning everything and rn i’m exploring how i like girls and might just be an androgynous lesbian etc.
It’s a journey. I’d recommend laying off the hormones while you think about wether this is right. And just be yourself for a while away from all the gender confusion stuff. You don’t have to force yourself to suddenly be hyper feminine (i thought detransitioning meant that).
You should be your first priority. Your health and body and wellbeing.
Also i feel you, was only on T 5 months and damn so much changed.. wish i was one of those people who barely change with T now haha. I quit and my voice seems to be sorta calming down now.
Never lose hope, it’s never late to be the person you were meant to be. Focus on your hobbies and have fun. You can be a woman with a deep voice. If you really can’t handle it then maybe get a consultation for voice training!
Either way i’m proud of you, always think critically about what’s best for you.
There is no one way to be a woman <333 coming from a woman lover LOLL i think women of all heights and voice ranges and looks are perfect.
I hope you realize how cool you are and that we both learn to love ourselves more!
I doubt it honestly. I’m not gonna stop myself lunging into this cause i like my body and i don’t wanna chop off my chest lol. I’m fine. A lot of people expressed that the realization of detransitioning hit them like a truck and wasn’t necessarily a slow realization like you said. And i’m closer to desisting than detrans cause i was on t for a couple months and all the changes started to gradually fade when i stopped a while ago. I like being a girl and being biologically healthy without all the mess i was gonna do initially (really wanted top surgery at one point) so why would i try to see if i wanna be a man still? that makes no sense. If i was truly trans i would be ok being called a he exclusively and living as a man which i’m not cause i’m a lesbian. I’m tired of everyone (even if you didn’t mean it that way) trying to say transness is still an option for me. It’s not and it made my life harder. It’s ok to suddenly wake up and realize you were wrong and many other detransitioners seem to have found out that way. I’m not considering ruining my life any longer lol. No more HRT and no more manhood. I’m a woman, that’s cool. Sorry lol i just hate whenever anyone suggests that my detransition might not be real cause it feels like i’m being pulled into that messy unhealthy self loathing mess of an existence akan transness (for me, of course for others it could work for them like i have married trans friends but it’s not for me)
Exactly, for me specifically i was bullied out of being a tomboy lmao. Girls saying dumb crap like “woah you’re strong for a girl” or “why are your hands so big” (i’m just big boned)
Don’t even get me started on the fights i had with family about wanting to wear comfortable clothes instead of dresses. I think if they fought me less and let me express myself and wear what i wanted i actually would have had a less intense relationship with gender and self expression.
The people around me growing up put a weirdly strong emphasis on what a girl is and what a boy is.
And i hated the box they put all girls in and my brain as a younger teen translated that into “ok i’ll head over to the boys box!!!”
As opposed to “fuck your boxes i’m me, i’m androgynous and that’s not some crime”
Growing up in a traditional household can be a bit… traumatic.. lmao
And boy are you right, peer pressure is fucked. I tried venting online and explaining all my complex emotions (couldn’t afford a therapist) and BAM everyone is telling me that it looks like signs of me being a man… it’s like the internet diagnosed me with transgender.
I still have trans friends (older and married so they seem to be happy with their choices and i respect that) and i didn’t start despising LGBT folk after detransitioning.
I just started thinking “isn’t this happening too often… there’s no way trans people especially trans men make up this much of the population”.
Shit’s weird. I just wish i was less prone to taking others words to heart, maybe that would have stopped those 5 months of HRT.
But hey, gotta learn somehow right? All we can do is try out best to live fulfilling lives and take care of ourselves and each other. And especially our bodies. And honestly fuck the perception of others and what they think a conventional man or woman should look like.
It’s fine to be a tomboy and it’s fine to be an effeminate man. It doesn’t erase your character or your good deeds and it shouldn’t mean you have no place in society or that you have to switch sides.
No it’s okay i get it, turns out it’s surprisingly common tho haha. My bad i just got touchy cause sometimes it feels like people treat you like a trans person in denial or something like that you know? I just wanna get away from that whole trans thing cause it makes me feel bad idk… you didn’t come across as a bitch at all dude no way Have a good day!! Also cute avatar loll i love cats