We may have to adapt our rules and change some things around but I will stress until I turn blue in the face, this is not a trans space. This is a detrans space, they are guests and should act like it.

This space does not center them and the moment it does, it's no longer detrans.

Unfortunately we live in a time where girls are discouraged from being anything but what society tells them to be, or they're expected to follow after women in their life. Girls who are more "masculine" are encouraged to try out new gender identities, rather then well.. just expressing themselves and being comfortable in their body and living how they choose to while expressing themselves how they want when it's really more simple then that.

Although unfortunately there are other issues too...

I feel this is a powerful post, and although not necessarily belonging here nor exactly related to detransition there is a very powerful and sadly, enraged message. I support OP in her journey and I hope she can find happiness in life. As a moderator of this subreddit I am opting to lock this post, and leave it on the subreddit. Please do not report it, it is not promoting anything as the OP in question did not tell anyone to transition, she merely spoke of her own experience.

She herself is not discriminating on identity and is merely speaking of her experience without encouraging transition outside of her own case. Many of us here know all too well of what she stated in this thread. If anyone disagrees with my action on this post, you are welcome to message me and try to explain to me why action should be taken against this post.

I will state though that our community is not a place to hate on any other communities. I am merely choosing this course of action because it is something I feel many of us can resonate with.

I'll be honest? If I didn't have to moderate this subreddit and see the vitriol on display within deleted and bypassed comments, the hatred we get thrown at us in modmail for fighting to keep this space up and the rumors and lies spread about me directly... I'd probably still hold a lot of my old views regarding trans people. It's because of the hostility, the insecurity and the constant barrage of attacks that I feel.. I guess the best way to describe it is, cold. It's like I lose any semblance of warmth in my heart toward them, I feel some degree of fear because this whole thing is experimental and we don't understand who benefits and who doesn't.. not to mention the long term complications that are just now being discovered and are for the most part unknown.

Nevermind the stuff I see on social media, the fact I see that fake detrans subreddit argued as the "real detrans sub" with that fake backstory and then they use it to launch attacks and crap talk detransitioners who are speaking with the right because the left refuses to hear them out.

My bias as someone with a DSD might be coming into play so other mods, if you feel this is off-topic? Feel free to remove it. Anyways...

There's a reason more and more of us older people with DSDs are now refusing to use the term intersex and some of us are even referring it as a slur equal to human hermaphrodite of medical past, considering intersex gives the wrong idea and impression. It was meant to represent "inbetween sex characteristics" and be a short hand label that comprised of 40+ different medical conditions between males and females, but somehow it became an overwriting aspect and an assumption of ambiguity and "having both parts" despite the latter not even being true but those levels of virilization and underdevelopment only being present in about 5 of the 40+ conditions.

Not only do you have people who are identifying as trans [namely young females with PCOS and males self diagnosing themselves due to having a thyroid problem or being prone to diabetes] but people who are now implying "intersex" is a third sex which couldn't be further from the truth, many of the conditions can only occur within one specific sex and of the ones that can occur in both sexes they manifest very differently.. take CAH for example. This is not just insulting but extremely damaging to medical care, especially when these same fakers[who are all over a certain notorious intersex sub btw] are claiming that "forced HRT" is damaging and that intersex people should be allowed to just exist... further proving they are overlooking why our conditions lead to such ambiguity and differences to begin with. Males with klinefelter often are recommended testosterone to offset the later health concerns of having two X chromosomes and their working Y. Females with Swyer need estrogen because they have no functional gonads and therefore CANNOT produce any outside of the adrenals which produces dangerously small amounts. Females with CAH need their corticosteroid treatments[not estrogen] to manage the salt wasting and regulate the dangerous salt wasting that is taking place within their body. Yet these activists are acting like it's all like removing gonads from children with AIS and horribly enough say NOTHING about the horrible doctors who are seeing a virilized clitoris, cutting the child open and ripping out her uterus and ovaries just so they can put her on testosterone later. The sex spectrum is a freaking farce and a harmful one.

Don't EVEN get me started on the 2-5% of people are intersex myth, that is bullshit of the highest calibur! It originated from a horrible woman known as Anne Fausto-Sterling who used to refer to people like me as male hermaphrodites, female hermaphrodites and pseudo hermaphrodites.. not to mention the "Cute short-hand" she also stressed how we weren't typical because we didn't look like the average male or female due to our conditions, basically dubbing us as not male or female enough and using OUR conditions to justify this ridiculous bimodal sex theory.

That crap RUINED my life, it led to me having my right gonad taken.. my father being gaslit into thinking I had to be assigned a certain way because of my virilization... then later trans activists using my gender non conformity AND my natural androgyny due to my neglected condition to push the idea I was trans, even saying that telling me about my condition would be bad and that they should let me naturally pick what I wanted to be.. nevermind being without the estrogen my body needed at the time during puberty caused me to become very sickly, frail and led to social bullying because I was isolated and different. My HATRED for these activists genuinely knows no limits at this point, especially the more people reach out to me and others on social media reporting the same or similar.

Do I think they're wrong for transitioning? No, I think they are being failed though if they're pampered and pushed down an affirmative pathway. A social transition means absolutely nothing in many cases because it's affirming and can be addicting in its feeling, especially if someone is dissociating. That said, I think gender therapists need to be terminated as a whole and the reigns be given back to trauma and family therapists. Sad to say gender "therapists" are more "cheerleaders" then therapists and they know nothing beyond cheerleading and affirmation. They are absolutely worthless for those dealing with a difficult time in their life..

My biggest gripe with transitioning probably comes from the fact there's no way to differentiate whether it "works" for one person, versus another. Many people here actually fit the criteria you described in your OP and still came to the conclusion they should have been offered better care and not just pushed into the idea that transitioning was their only choice. I have less issues with the trans people themselves unless they're the same sorts who are advocating for removing blockades and helping minors get ahold of illegal HRT, or telling people that x makes you trans.

I see transitioning as a band-aid, we have no way to know who the band-aid sticks to or how long it will even stick, if not permanently. However transitioning is not a treatment and nor should it be advertised especially as the only solution, especially to children who clearly come from abusive, regressive families and are uncomfortable with their changing body and society's perspective of them.

In terms of adults, I see it more like a "choice" my main fight is for kids, because if an adult wants something they're going to get it by any means anyways.. If anything, I think it's time to stop having the cake and eating it too, meaning no more coverage or "health protection" for something clearly cosmetic and attributing to a transgender lifestyle.

That said, I won't walk up to a trans person and tell them they're wrong for transitioning if the band-aid seems to be working. I typically won't start probing them to start thinking, or even suggest they shouldn't have transitioned unless they're already questioning that themselves.

Honestly, there are some transgender people who don't care about a detransitioner talking about their experience and guiding someone who is questioning so they don't make a mistake but you really need to emphasize the "some."

I recently saw a post where trans people were even skeptical of the fake detrans subreddit and calling it a 'terf den' too, despite it being actively modded by trans people and they even banned detransitioners like myself, shapeshifter, and others. It really opens your eyes that they're uncomfortable with detransition as a concept and don't want it to exist.

I find it more interesting they're using the art of a known child predator who the trans community refuses to disavow.. honestly, that study is about as "good" as the one GCs like to cite, which led to none of the patients with GD being affirmed and they claim most desisted but they counted loss of follow up as desisted.. when in reality the number was closer to half the participants desisted. Let's also look at what "puberty blockers do" they have extensive new research coming through that's showing they do slow and halt mental development meaning someone being affirmed while on blockers will only continue to push forward with very few outliers.

In short, it's a very manipulative argument.

... This person has been harassing this subreddit for a straight year, over it at this point in fact. Their comments always range from accusing us of being a cult or telling people they're trans and should embrace it....

I think which side is acting more like the cult should be clear.

Because quite a bit of them don't like the reality that many of us seemed certain in our transitions and we detransitioned because it either wasn't the answer, or the right thing to do. Granted, I'm not of that positive mentality you are.. I don't think it's great and successful for most people, especially those being persuaded as children and teenagers. We're considered transphobic simply for existing anyways.

It's kind of like how you have trans meds, and transgender people. The former gets discluded in the talk of "trans people" and you hear of the most ridiculous and bad of the latter.