This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or an inauthentic user.
The user demonstrates:
- Personal Investment: They engage in complex, nuanced arguments about gender ideology, trauma, and medical detransition, showing a deep understanding of the community's discourse.
- Consistent, Passionate Ideology: Their viewpoint is fiercely critical of gender identity theory and consistent across all comments, aligning with a known radical feminist perspective common among some detransitioners.
- Community Interaction: They offer support, suggest resources, and discuss the creation of new communities for gender-nonconforming people, indicating a genuine desire to engage with and help others.
The passion and specific ideological stance are not red flags but are characteristic of a genuine, highly opinionated member of this community.
About me
I'm a feminine man who started questioning because I didn't fit the masculine stereotype. I was told online that this meant I wasn't really a man, so I identified as non-binary for a while. I realized this ideology was just reinforcing the same sexist stereotypes I was trying to escape, and I became scared by the serious health risks of medical intervention. I now understand my discomfort was never with being male, but with the narrow box society tried to put me in. I'm finally comfortable as a feminine man and regret that so many others are pushed toward changing their bodies instead of embracing who they are.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started because I just didn't fit in. I was a feminine boy and I felt like there was no place for me in the world. I saw the way people online talked about gender and it seemed like an answer. They said if you didn't like the stereotypes forced on you, maybe you weren't really a boy or a girl. For a while, I believed that. I thought, "Maybe I'm not a man because I don't feel like one," and I started to identify as non-binary.
But the more I looked into it, the more I realized the whole idea was built on the same sexist stereotypes I was trying to escape. I kept seeing this message that to be a "real" woman, you had to be one way, and to be a "real" man, you had to be another. The trans community I was in had just repackaged these old, rigid rules and was telling people they had to change their bodies to fit them. It felt like a trap. I remember reading older feminist work that fought against this exact thinking—that your interests or how you dress don't define your sex—and it was like a lightbulb went on. That was the empowering idea I needed, not the idea that I had to change myself.
I started to understand that my discomfort wasn't with being male; it was with the box everyone said I had to fit into as a male. I hated the pressure to be masculine. The idea that I could just be a feminine man, that that was okay and valid, wasn't presented to me as an option. Instead, the solution offered was to change my entire identity.
I never took hormones or had any surgeries. I only transitioned socially for a short time, and I am so grateful that I didn't go further. Seeing what happens to others who did medicalize made me realize how dangerous that path can be. I learned that if you take estrogen for a long time, your body stops making testosterone on its own. If you then stop, you're left with no primary sex hormone, and that can lead to serious health problems like osteoporosis. Your body wasn't built to have zero hormones. That scared me, and it was a big part of why I stepped back before it was too late.
Looking back, I don't believe "gender" is real in the way it's talked about now. I think it's a concept entirely rooted in sexism. There are masculine and feminine expressions, but they don't have anything to do with whether you're a man or a woman. A woman isn't femininity; a man isn't masculinity. You can be a masculine woman or a feminine man and still be completely your sex. Defining it any other way always circles back to stereotypes.
I do have some regrets about that period of my life. I regret that I was so confused and that I almost fell for an ideology that would have had me alter my body to feel acceptable. I regret that I didn't find the voices sooner that said I was perfect just as I was—a man who doesn't conform to masculinity. I'm thankful I found a community that supports that now, a place for gender non-conforming people without the pressure of trans ideology.
Now, I see myself as just a feminine man. I'm comfortable with that. I don't regret exploring my identity because it led me to a better understanding of myself, but I deeply regret that the culture right now pushes so many young people, especially feminine boys and masculine girls, toward thinking they need to change their bodies instead of challenging the stereotypes that made them feel wrong in the first place.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 19 | Started questioning my identity as a male because I didn't fit masculine stereotypes. Began identifying as non-binary. |
| 20 | Researched feminist theory and realized my struggle was with sexist stereotypes, not my sex. Began to detransition socially. |
| 20 | Fully rejected the concept of gender identity. Came to see myself as a gender non-conforming (feminine) man. |
Top Comments by /u/DiamondEyesFox:
correct
the idea that you need dysphoria to be trans (transmed/truscum) is a rapidly receding and heavily stigmatized viewpoint.
tucutes have taken over trans discourse and believe you dont need dysphoria to be trans, because anyone can change genders by changing how masc/fem they present according to butlers performative ideology
anything other than transmedicalism is just woke sexism repackaged
doing or liking X things or activities does not mean you are more of an X gender, as implied by butlerian performance theory.
any definition for what a man or woman is outside of biological human males and females will inevitably regress into the use of sexist stereotypes (social role view/Self-ID view) or resort to circular logic
look into some of the older work combatting sexist stereotypes and rigid sex based gender roles, it contained alot of empowering ideas that the trans crowd seems to have rejected.
also take a look into people that reported trauma from rape and sexual assault and see how alot of them moved past their identification of womanhood with victimization
there are lots of great resources
keep posting here too, the replies may be hit or miss, but if you post enough youll find the help you need, its a numbers game
gender isn't real the entire concept of gender as separate from sex is rooted in sexism
yes, there are masculine and feminine gender expressions, but saying that by changing your presentation sufficiently you become the other gender is literally perpetuating sexism.
women ≠ femininity men ≠ masculinity
its not a lie
the majority of trans people dont think the way you do because we wouldnt be telling 12 year olds they might really be boys and encouraging them to get their breasts removed and legally protecting this practice if that were the case
the crazy and regressive ones have all the power and representation and are in all the institutions. bidens new energy secretary just said we should empower children to transition if they dont feel like they fit their assigned gender.
fit their assigned gender means fitting in a box of sexist labels.
that makes sense! i agree with you
personally i like gncnottrans more as it very specifically highlights that its a space for gnc people where they wont be pressured into trans ideology.
authentic expressions, while nice, doesnt tell me what the sub is.
on second thought, i like the stealth aspect of the second one, itll probably stick around longer and be more discreet, but id like there to be a bit of middle ground maybe?
i think discreet names are good, so long as its regularly showcased/pinned/talked about somewhere where people can notice and be reminded it exists.
maybe something like authenticgnc?
please always remember, no matter who is reading this
nothing you can do will ever make you less of a woman, and you can be a woman (or a man) in a myriad of different ways that have nothing to do with sexist stereotypes. we are just as right to denounce sexist stereotypes when presented to us by the left and TRAs as we were to when our parents and the evangelical right pushed the same stuff on us.
reject sexist stereotypes no matter who they come from, if someone tells you women are like this and men are like this, tell them theyre wrong every time, you know in your heart that isnt true.
you're perfect just as you are, it just might take a little time for yourself and others to see it, but once youre able to see it, even if it may be difficult sometimes, youll shine so brightly in your own way and everyone will take notice.
please dont be afraid to reach out if you are in crisis, so many of us are here for you
im not entirely sure, but ive heard from lots of MTF people that if you quit E and dont start T, it basically speeds up degeneration and you can get osteoporosis and stuff
our bodies werent built to have zero hormones flowing through them, bad stuff happens
if you take E long enough, your body stops producing T and you have to take it externally or else shit can start shutting down
it might not actually be agp meta attraction
maybe youre just a submissive/feminine male and youre being confronted with an environment that says its not okay.
can you take a moment to imagine what it would feel like if you were in a supportive environment that allowed for you to express yourself in this way?