This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's narrative is highly consistent, detailed, and spans years of personal development. They identify as a desister (someone who considered but did not medically transition) and their perspective aligns with common desister experiences: a history of dysphoria, a focus on self-acceptance over medical intervention, and practical/logistical concerns about transition. The language is empathetic, nuanced, and reflects the stated passion and personal history of someone who has grappled with these issues.
About me
I felt like a boy trapped in a girl's body from the time I was three, and I believed transitioning was my only path to happiness. My severe self-esteem issues and eating disorder made me think changing my gender would solve everything. Moving away for college and having a spiritual awakening made me realize my body was never the problem. I learned to accept myself as a gender nonconforming woman, and my dysphoria completely faded. I am so glad I never medically transitioned and am now at peace in my own skin.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was just a little kid, around three years old. I remember feeling like I was supposed to be a boy. I hated that I was a girl. I rejected everything feminine—dresses, the color pink, dolls. I only wanted boy things: boy clothes, boy toys, hanging out with boys. It felt like a deep, innate part of me, like I was just wired this way. This feeling, this dysphoria, stayed with me all through my childhood and got even worse when I was a teenager.
I had a lot of other issues too. I had really bad self-esteem and hated how I looked. I remember looking in the mirror and thinking I was the ugliest person in the world, like an alien. I thought my hands and feet were too big, my face was all wrong, and I developed bulimia because I was so unhappy with my body. I believed that if I could just transition and become a boy, all of this pain would go away. It was my biggest fantasy and my main goal in life for a long time.
I started to really think about actually transitioning when I got older. I looked into the logistics—the cost of hormones and surgeries, the recovery time, the fact that I’d be on medication for the rest of my life. I also thought about the social side of things. I worried about discrimination, about not being able to "pass" as a man because I’m short, and about how it would affect my chances of finding love. The more I learned about what medical transition really involved, the more I saw it as a form of extreme body modification. It started to feel less like a magical solution and more like a huge, risky, and expensive commitment.
A big turning point for me was when I moved away from my small hometown to a big city for college in my early twenties. Getting out of my parents' house, which was a pretty toxic and stressful environment, changed everything. I was exposed to new people, new ideas, and new ways of living. I threw myself into my art, my studies, making friends, and just experiencing life. Slowly, I started to realize that my happiness didn't depend on being a different gender.
I had a kind of spiritual awakening, partly helped by trying psychedelic drugs. I looked at myself in the mirror on mushrooms and felt a deep sadness for how much I had rejected my own body. I saw my body as something that had always been there for me, and I felt like I had been ungrateful and cruel to it. I realized that my body wasn't wrong; the problem was my inability to accept myself.
I came to understand that I am a woman, but I’m a gender nonconforming woman. There’s no one way to be female. I can have short hair, wear whatever clothes I want, have "masculine" interests, and still be a woman. The limitations I felt were coming from society's narrow rules, not from my body itself. Letting go of the idea that I needed to transition to be happy was like a weight lifting off my shoulders. My dysphoria faded away.
I never medically transitioned. I never took hormones or had any surgeries, and now I'm really glad I didn't. I see my body as a whole, functioning system that I want to keep healthy and strong. I don't judge others who choose to transition—that's their path—but for me, it would have been a huge sink of time, money, and energy that I'm glad I avoided.
I don't have any regrets about not transitioning. My journey was about learning to love myself as I am. I still have moments where I feel insecure, but overall, I have so much gratitude for my body and my life. I finally feel whole.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 3 | First felt intense dysphoria, believed I was "supposed to be a boy." |
| Teen Years | Dysphoria worsened; struggled with severe self-esteem issues, body dysmorphia, and an eating disorder. |
| Early 20s | Moved to a big city for college; life experiences led me to question the need to transition. |
| Early 20s | Had a spiritual awakening; realized self-acceptance was not dependent on gender and dysphoria faded. |
| Now (Mid-30s) | Comfortably identify as a gender nonconforming woman; no desire to transition. |
Top Comments by /u/Dith_q:
There is no "born into the wrong body." We are all in our correct bodies. The idea that someone could be "born into the wrong body" is and idea that reenforces that there is a "correct" way to have a body, and that is to align oneself with the gender binary.
I am not against transitioning if that's what someone wants to do with their body. But I do not believe anyone ever has or ever will be "born into the wrong body." It just doesn't work that way.
It's important that everyone who undergoes transition understands that the process will not make you female (or male), it will make you a transwoman (or transman).
Although I support my trans friends, and support the hell out of trans rights, it's not reality IMO to say that a biological female and transwoman are the same thing in every regard.
I'm sorry you're having a difficult time OP. I wouldn't give up finding a person who loves you as you are, or starting a family if that's what you want. Neither being trans or a GNC male should be barriers to these things.
The thing I dislike is how frequently "conservative" and "detrans" are used almost as synonyms when someone wants to lob criticism at the detrans community. I think this is done in bad faith as it's easy to disregard the detrans viewpoint if you conflate it with "conservative transphobia."
I do think that leaving insulting comments on transfolks' videos is psychotic behavior, though. If anyone in the detrans community is engaging in this, they should recognize that they're in the wrong.
Partially, yeah. I did mushrooms and looked at myself in the mirror and felt deep sadness that I'd rejected my body. I felt like my body was its own entity worthy of respect and I'd been cruel and ungrateful towards it, which I was able link to my body feeling sick, sad, and tired. I've since become extremely grateful that I have a functioning body and have no desire to change it, only to keep it strong and healthy.
Transition was my life's obsession and goal at one point. I had "innate dysphoria" starting before I could even talk and struggled deeply with the fact that I was born female. It never felt right, and I never identified with it. When I was a teenager I'd lose myself in elaborate daydreams in which I was male. I planned and fantasized about my medical transition journey often.
As I got older, I considered very seriously the logistics of transition. The financial aspect, the impact it would have on my health (especially the potential for complications), the lifelong commitment to medications and procedures, and the recovery times from said procedures.
Then I thought about the social aspects and I had to be honest with myself that while fantasizing about transition was fun, living it could be a very different and difficult story. I worried about the discrimination I would face if I wasn't stealth-passing. I worried about how I might have very limited dating prospects. I worried about height-discrimination, because I would have been a very short man. Other things too, but these were some of the main ones.
I let these thoughts all tumble around in my head for many months as I weighed the pros and cons of transition.
While I was figuring it out, I moved away from home, and my life's focus became my career in the arts, travelling, dating, being with my friends, and my own physical and mental health. Somewhere along the way, I realized that my happiness and fulfillment doesn't hinge AT ALL on me being one gender or another. Internalizing that, for me, was the path out of dysphoria.
If I were in your shoes, I'd leave no stone unturned when thinking about this. I'd also say that if you're below the age of 20, don't underestimate how radically different your understanding of life can change in the next 5 years.
I am also OFAB and "felt male" from age 3 into my early 20s.
I'm in my mid-30s now and believe much of my dysphoria stemmed from a narrow understanding of what being female actually means and DOESN'T mean. I believed being female meant I should somehow "feel feminine" but when I was a kid, nothing about me was particularly femme. I had short hair, I wore boy's clothes, I collected dinosaurs, loved gaming (early 90s gaming was extremely male dominated), rode a BMX bike, and listened to metal. I HATED that I was born female because it felt like everything I identified with and enjoyed was "for boys."
But then I grew up and realized that just because society was insisting that girls should wear dresses, play with dolls, fantasize about their wedding days and look forward to motherhood, doesn't make me any less female. It just makes society wrong. (Zero shade towards any folks who are into those things I listed!)
You can be female and be ANY kind of person you want. Dress however you're comfortable. Act however feels real. Pursue whatever interests you. Be whoever you want to be. You don't need medications or procedures to be you.
When I hit early adulthood, I really started thinking about logistics and how difficult the path I was on would become. If I had medically transitioned it would have meant a huge sink of money and time (as a college student, I had neither) for procedures, recovery, and revisions, and the additional, life-long financial burden of medication.
That was also when I started thinking about what self acceptance meant to me. It took me a long time to finally realize that what my soul really needed was for me to just learn to love myself exactly as I was, and to let go of the idea that being seen as male was the only way I'd ever be a worthy human being. Once I stopped believing that transition was a prerequisite for happiness, it was like my dysphoria no longer had a purpose and it faded away.
Sorry OP. This is my main gripe with the industry surrounding trans and gender issues. I feel like too many people are allowed to undergo voluntary procedures without fully understanding the implications and risks.
Thanks for helping others by sharing your story.
You have a beautiful voice that sounds 100% female. Objectively. It doesn't sound like HRT impacted your voice whatsoever.
If your experience of your voice is as you describe in your post, I highly suggest you seek out someone to talk to, ideally a professional. I feel like you have something akin to vocal dysmorphia. They way you describe your voice is not consistent with the way it sounds to others. I hope the comments here bring you some peace. Good luck.
Is there any point in transitioning? Some people think so. It's one of those things that I'd think you should pause on if you have any reservations about it at all. You can always transition further down the road if you decide it is your path. It gets more complicated if you medically transition and later realize you aren't trans.
It was my personal experience that dysphoria faded and eventually disappeared once I hit adulthood. If I had made the decision to indulge my dysphoria and transition at 15, I'm almost certain I would have regretted it deeply. As a cis female, I still find much of mainstream feminity very unrelatable, which can feel like dysphoria, but I accept now that it's because I'm a gender nonconforming female and always have been.