This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user self-identifies as a desister (socially transitioned, no medical intervention), expresses consistent, passionate opinions grounded in personal experience, and demonstrates normal human conversational patterns, including humor, empathy, and frustration. The account's behavior aligns with a genuine, emotionally invested user.
About me
I got caught up in identifying as a man as a teenager after being influenced online, and my friends and I fell into it together. My journey was about social pressure and escapism, even though I never medically transitioned. Breaking away from the internet was what finally started to break the spell for me, though it took me a decade to truly grow out of my dysphoria. I see now that my obsession with gender was an addiction, much like the drug addiction I struggled with later. I'm a woman in my thirties now, finally comfortable in my own skin, but I regret all the time I lost running from myself.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started when I was just a teenager, back in the early 2000s. I got really deep into online communities, anime, and porn. I had three friends who were just like me, and we all fell into this together. Looking back, I see now that we were part of an early wave of a kind of social contagion. We were kids, and we were being influenced by adults we met online who fueled our obsession with transitioning. It was a form of escapism for me, a way to run from myself and my problems.
I identified as a man and presented socially as one for several years, but I never took hormones or had any surgeries. For a long time, I felt like I might be overstepping in detrans spaces because of that, like my experience wasn't as valid. But I understand now that the social pressure and the identity issues were very real, even without medical intervention.
What finally broke the spell for me and my friends was cutting ourselves off from the internet and those online influences. It’s funny—once we did that, my three friends immediately lost their desire to transition and just learned to embrace who they were. It took me a lot longer, almost another decade. I didn't really start to grow out of my dysphoria until my late twenties. I had to learn to stop obsessing over gendered clothes and behaviors and just see things as they are. I had to grow confident in the body I have.
I spent a good part of my twenties in a really bad place, a raging heroin addict. I see a lot of parallels between that addiction and my transition. They were different addictions, but the end result was the same: a lot of disappointment and sorrow over what I became, always wondering who I could have been if I had just stopped indulging.
My thoughts on gender now are pretty simple. I think we need to stop gendering everything so intensely. I’m bisexual, and I’m attracted to people, not their labels. The biggest turn-off for me now regarding trans people isn't their mixed-sex bodies or surgeries; it’s the ideology. The only trans person I could think to date would be one who openly admits their true sex, doesn’t claim to be the opposite sex, and doesn’t spew the misogynistic and homophobic rhetoric that you see so often online.
Do I have any regrets? I regret the time I lost, the years I spent running from myself. I don’t regret the journey itself because it eventually led me back to myself, but I deeply regret the pain and the time wasted. I’m in my thirties now and I’m finally just me, a woman who is comfortable in her own skin.
| Age | Year | Event |
|---|---|---|
| Early Teens | Early 2000s | Influenced by online adults, anime, and porn; began to socially identify and present as male with friends. |
| Late 20s | ~2010s | Finally began to grow out of dysphoria and re-identify as a woman. |
| 30s | 2019 | Fully comfortable and confident as a woman, participating in detrans community discussions. |
Top Comments by /u/DuckingWrong:
I feel you. I spent my twenties as a raging heroin addict and I always relate to these stories. Our addiction was different but the end result was the same. Dissapointment and sorrow over what you became, always wondering who you could have been by now if you just stopped indulging your addiction.
bre would, honestly. My biggest turn off from trans people isn't their mixed sexed bodies or surgeries, it's their ideology. The only trans person I could think to date would be one who openly and honestly admits their true sex, doesn't claim to be the opposite sex, and doesn't spew the misogynistic/homophobic/rapey garbage the most horrible trans people/allies are throwing at us. I actually prefer more feminine men as well as women, as I'm bi, and if I met someone who opened up and told me they used to ID as trans it wouldn't be a deal breaker unless they still had the above mentioned harmful views.
Edit: also just pointing out that as I never medically transitioned, but presented socially as a man for several years before re-IDing as a woman, I feel like I might be overstepping on this sub as it's for detrans people but I'm not sure if y'all count people like me, sorry if I'm intruding. But I think the question invites answers from all sides.
It's funny I had three friends including myself who were pioneers in this social contagion back in the early 2000's. What got us out of our anime and porn fueled trans identities was cutting off contact from the internet and the adults online who were fueling our obsession. Suddenly we didn't have gender dysphoria and all three of them immediately stopped wanting to transition and just embraced themselves. It took me another decade but the other three were absolutely groomed into it. They never would have wanted to transition if they hadn't gotten the idea online from adult trans people.
Stop obsessing over gendered clothes, behavior, styles, etc. Grow confident in the body you have. Unfortunately that tends to come with age, I grew out of my dysphoria in my late twenties. Try it, just stop gendering things and look at is as things that just are.
You know what I think? You were a child when you made the decision and I can't fault you for not knowing what you wanted at that age. I'm in my thirties and still have no idea what I want in life. Anyone who judges you for being "fake" is a shitty person more worried about politics and woke points than you or your happiness. You are still so very young, even though you've grown a lot over the years. Friends will come and go for tons of reasons, don't sabotage your own happiness for what others might think about you.
I think as long as you were honest about your reasons it would help. Not accusing you of anything as I don't know you but I'd only really worry about the one's who transed due to sexual or fetish reasons. I'd be very suspicious that they'd relapse back into overwatching porn again as opposed to those who resolved their identity issues.
Am i on the wrong sub...? This isn't the debate sub is it? Because no outside a sub specifically for debate i do not owe you a play by play of my opinion. That's the thing about opinions, we all get to have them. And i don't have to waste time with a man who sees a woman's opinion as an invitation for debate..
You have such a lovely jaw line, it honestly looked good with T but your after picture is just lovely. Love the piercings, and you have beautiful lips (don't know how to say that without banjo music playing in the background lol) but as an artist who loves anatomy, it's pretty).
If it was the debate sub I'd be the shithead for posting my opinion then refusing to engage. I made a comment on a whim while at work. I didn't have the time or energy to engage with someone who was being unecessarily aggressive. Probably would have been an interesting conversation but I'm not a fan of internet style dickishness that gets excused as "debate".