I have an intersex condition, and I consider myself cis because I live as the gender that corresponds to my biological sex, despite an error in my gender assignment at birth due to genital ambiguity. I went through quite a bit of questioning about my gender after my diagnosis— I was told, in my adolescence, after a very confusing puberty, that I had working reproductive organs of the opposite gender from which I was raised. Despite it feeling easier to live as the gender I was raised as, it was healthier for my body and preserved my fertility to live as my sex.

However, cases like mine are not trans. The majority of intersex people (over 80%) live as the same gender that they were assigned at birth, because the most common conditions do not cause a disparity between genitals and reproductive organs. Those who change gender are also cis for the most part— because they live as the gender that most closely aligns with their functional sex — intersex bodies, even if they have ambiguity or atypicality in presentation, still function as male or female after puberty. Someone can have ovaries or ovotestes that function as ovaries and have male looking genitals, for a multitude of reasons. Someone can have testes that work (or don’t work) and have female looking genitals for a multitude of reasons. These cases along with many other combinations of gonad/genital disparity, can result in “assignment errors”.

I have observed some of what you have as well. I think there’s a few factors causing it. First, it was already difficult having a non conforming body, but these days when any non conformity, especially physical sex characteristics, is automatically labeled as trans, young intersex people may use those labels to describe themselves. I used to, before I learned more about my own condition. Second, some ppl who switch gender for biological reasons I stated above, will be forcibly labeled as trans by trans people (due to what’s perceived as social transition) even though they are cis. Third, some people, and I have encountered this, want some kind of concrete reason for being trans so badly, that they will fake or convince themselves that they are intersex.

Hope this helps provide some answers. Being intersex is real, and we get the shit end of the stick medically, socially, legally. Too many people are pressured or forced into surgeries they don’t want. If you want to know what giving children (and parents) the “option” of sex modification results in, just look at intersex people and the high rates of depression and anxiety and PTSD. Please don’t mock us or believe the things trans communities that fetishize us say. If you have any more questions about intersex conditions (medically termed DSDs), feel free to PM me!

I am also intersex (and have a DSD), and because of my genitalia being observed as female looking at birth, but having male reproductive organs (testes) internally, I was raised a girl and then struggled for years with my gender identity. At 13, I thought because I identified as a girl but was beginning to have the physical body of a boy, that I was transfemme. I never thought to question if I could live as a boy, since I was so caught up in how trans people think of gender and sex— that they have to be separate and that sex cannot influence gender. I was on the verge of getting HRT and surgeries, but I suddenly felt like it wasn’t right and didn’t go thru with it. I live as a guy now— in alignment with my sex, so to speak. It terrifies me how close I was to transitioning MtF for reasons that could be resolved in ways that were not transition. What I needed during my adolescence was good therapy and an understanding family, but instead I found doctors who used me as study material and trans communities who used me as a way to justify their own choices

I’m not in the server anymore, but I remember seeing your pictures on /lgbt/ too. Either you’re pretending to be the person in these pictures, or someone else is using stuff that you posted admittedly in a public server and/or public forum. Idk much about u but I just noticed there’s a lot of inconsistency with things that you’ve said and either someone is LARPing as you, or you need mental health treatment. It’s possible, if you suffer from dissociation, to not remember large chunks of what you’ve said or even know about yourself

I don’t like intersex being grouped into LGBT either— there’s some similarity in experience but we have more in common with say, people with albinism or something. However, please do not call it a deformity. I wouldn’t call someone with albinism or vitiligo deformed, that is pretty insulting— the same applies for people with DSDs. “Deformity” is also what doctors call us before doing, essentially in some cases, sex change operations on children. Have some compassion, please

That’s alright, I know how you feel about the “super clinical stuff”. I spent a lot of time researching because it applies to me, so if you need help understanding how any of the biology works, I’m happy to explain in “layman” terms for you! There’s way too much misinformation about these conditions, and I always try my best to educate.

It’s upsetting for me too. Trans people fantasize and fetishize my condition. “Oh I’d love to have discovered I was actually internally the opposite sex”! They have no idea how gut wrenching that kind of diagnosis is, how much one can feel like their whole life is over. Imagine being told you need to get a sex change operation to live as the gender you grew up as… or if you want to “live as yourself”, better start being a gender you never imagined yourself as. Never being able to have sex normally, I am at least lucky in that I will be able to produce sperm with assistance… but any intimate encounter will have to be prefaced with “btw I am a medical curiosity”. Can’t relate to anyone, because unless they are intersex, they’ve no way of fathoming ego death after a diagnosis. I spent a year after my diagnosis depressed to the point of contemplating suicide. I also spent that time thinking about transitioning MtF, saving up money for FFS, and ultimately, I couldn’t do it because the idea of removing my healthy organs made me feel ill. Intersex people are working to end the medical discrimination that we face, to ensure that doctors cannot operate on children below the age of majority, and it feels like the trans community works against us/fetishizes us. It does, as you say, feel incredibly exhausting and angering when people use something incredibly difficult and personal you’ve experienced, to elevate their own social status

Hey, aren’t you that amab intersex person I saw in a 4chan related discord server? I don’t think you should post here especially since from what I’ve seen you’re constantly oscillating on what your gender identity is. I wish you the best of luck with figuring yourself out though and I hope you get the support you need.

To everyone else here, intersex ppl often look androgynous or not like their birth assigned gender, and that can cause a lot of confusion with figuring out gender. Please don’t shit on them for the way they look or doubt their experiences.

That is not anything I said at all. Intersex people are not both sexes, it is impossible to be. I have an intersex condition. It is called 5 alpha reductase deficiency. The inability to produce DHT in an otherwise normal male. It caused me to be born with no scrotum and a penis that resembled a clitoris. I was raised a girl before my diagnosis. This is one of the more well known conditions.

Also people with ovaries usually never have dysfunctional ones because of how ovarian tissue forms in the womb…

I choose to not call my genitals or my life experiences a deformity because I am not sick, I’m a healthy male who simply lacks a penis. Thinking I was “sick” was what made me feel tempted to medically transition MtF, which would not have been the right choice for me.

Please, get your facts straight. And don’t argue with someone who has a DSD on what a DSD is

I struggled with being bullied, ostracized, struggled with medical discrimination, with being used like a case study— my whole life was upended because of my condition. How would you like to grow up your whole life thinking you were one thing to have an ultrasound prove you completely wrong, after a period of distressing changes? Oh I forget, you had some kind of fantasy of wanting to be male. It’s an insult to people like me who have struggled deeply as a result of that which you fantasize. You of all people don’t get to call it a “deformity”. Apologies if I am harsh, but I don’t take kindly to people spreading misinformation and reducing a group’s struggles, especially since you aren’t even part of that group.

I just think being transgender is this ideology that modern politics have made up like yet another alternative fact. Biological sex is immutable, and gender is a construct. I don’t believe in transgenderism enough to call myself trans, I suppose.

But you’re right, I can just exist. That’s what I’ve been doing this quarantine. Going on E blockers has helped me grow even taller and masculinise more, and I finally feel more like me. Since I already produce quite a bit of T, I think low dosing or microdosing with gel would be my best bet in terms of avoiding or lessening the negative side effects and still achieving the results I want.

Thank you for the advice

These days, medical protocol is to default to not operating. Cosmetic genital modification in surgery is now generally a discouraged practice. However, it still happens and one big reason is the parents. Around the turn of the century, David Reimer’s exposé of John Money, the sexologist who experimented on Reimer and published a theory about gender that proposed widespread modification for intersex babies (essentially, if you transition a child young enough they will become the gender they’re raised as), caused a huge uproar and public outcry against the practice. A lot of intersex people then rode that wave of public awareness and sued. This changed medical protocols from “operating at every instance” to “operating only if parents really insisted”. Despite this change in protocol, a study done on DSD clinics in Europe show that a significant portion of parents who have a child with ambiguity (some show up to 50%, other clinics show 20%) will insist heavily on modification, even knowing the risks. Interviews with parents will show that they find the state of the genitals to the unacceptable, that they do not care about risks/complications/their child possibly never being able to enjoy sex. These days, the frontier is not necessarily medical institutions (though work still needs to be done), but rather parents and society. We can stop doctors from pushing surgeries, but we can’t pass a law that will prohibit parents from fast tracking their kid to surgery the moment it’s legal, and we certainly can’t pass laws that prevent those children themselves from seeking modification as soon as they can. We face the ethical conundrum that often intersects the discourse around trans kids. There’s a deep shame around being intersex. Kids will want to be whatever makes them fit in. Parents will want their kids to be normal. And just as “trans kids” has offered a path to that normalcy for parents of very GNC kids, modification represents that same path for parents of intersex kids. Ultimately, we’ve done a lot to curb unethical medical control over intersex bodies, but we now need to change how parents and general society feels about intersex conditions— because that is the root of the issue of modification in the first place.

I think several things would help immensely— medically accurate research and information about various intersex conditions. Sharing this info with people around you. And in terms of media representation— showing the world that it is possible to live a normal, happy life as an intersex person who did not go under the knife as a child. In fact, it probably needs to be shown that that’s likely the best way an intersex person can have a complete life as themselves

Iirc 8-9% of intersex individuals transition to resemble the opposite of their assigned sex right? It makes me wonder if many chose it out of practicality if they already have some dysphoria. But being intersex and looking completely androgynous body/face wise does make one feel a bit alien, and having always preferred a masculine look, I felt uncomfortable with my body.

I attend university in California, and T is decently accessible. I might buy some T gel, microdose and carefully monitor how I feel about the changes.

I think my relationship with feminism is that having grown up socialized as male by my parents and treated like they’d treat a son, exploring what womanhood meant and whether or not it was for me in ages 13-17 also accompanied a shit ton of fuck ups. I was masc presenting half the time and would intimidate girls, and even butch girls I knew at school admonished me for wielding an unconscious and assholish form of male entitlement ingrained from being socialized as male. It took a long time for feminism to accept my presence, and transitioning and presenting male to the public often feels like a betrayal. Like I’m in line with the oppressors the way everyone from school had always suspected.