This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the comments provided, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's story is highly detailed, emotionally complex, and internally consistent over a long period. They describe a very specific and plausible personal journey: a feminine gay man from the Philippines who transitioned (MTF) for six years primarily due to internalized homophobia and dating prospects, but detransitioned due to social anxiety, feeling "fake," and the practical limitations of being trans in their society.
The narrative includes nuanced, contradictory feelings about hormones, dysphoria, and self-acceptance that are characteristic of genuine, difficult lived experience rather than a scripted agenda.
About me
I was born male and was always a feminine boy, which led to bullying and a deep shame about being gay. I started estrogen at 23, hoping it would make my life easier and my attraction to men feel valid. For six years, I lived as a woman but became incredibly isolated and anxious, constantly terrified of being seen as a fraud. I stopped hormones two years ago and my social anxiety vanished, finally allowing me to live freely as a male. I've accepted that I am a feminine gay man, and now I'm focusing on finding happiness beyond gender and romance.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been long and complicated, and I’m still figuring things out. I was born male, and ever since I was a kid, I was very feminine—my walk, my speech, my whole personality. I knew I was attracted to men from the age of seven. I was bullied a lot for being a feminine boy, and I only ever had meaningful friendships with girls. My father was a terrible figure in my life; he had many vices, was unfaithful, and he hated me for being gay. This all led to a deep sense of internalized homophobia. I started to believe that if I were a woman, my attraction to men would be valid and accepted.
So, at 23 years old, I started taking estrogen. I was on HRT for about six years. At first, it seemed like an escape. I became what people called a "beautiful tall Asian woman." The hormones gave me some things I liked: my mood was better, my depression lifted, I had a very low libido which I preferred, and it saved me from the severe acne and balding that runs in my family. It gave me a more youthful complexion. I developed small breasts, about an A-cup.
But transitioning didn’t solve my problems; it made many of them worse. My dysphoria actually became more intense over time. I developed extreme social anxiety. I felt like I was living a lie. I was always paranoid about being "clocked" as trans. I’d go outside covered head-to-toe in a hoodie, mask, and hat, terrified of being seen. I lost friends, became isolated, and my career stalled because I was too scared to go to a job interview and explain who I was. I was passable, but I knew I wasn’t a woman, and I feared that people could tell. I never felt like I fit in with other trans women, who often seemed focused on looks and attention in a way I couldn't relate to.
A big reason I transitioned was because I thought it would make dating easier. As a feminine gay man, I had no luck with men. I thought becoming a woman would let me have the kind of straight, romantic relationship I saw in movies. But that wasn't the case. While I did get more sexual attention from men, genuine relationships were impossible. Once a man found out I was trans, it was over. I’m still a virgin at 31. I realized that long-term relationships between two gay men are probably more possible than between a trans woman and a straight man.
After six years, I stopped HRT. I’m now two years off estrogen. When I stopped, my body started to change back. My testosterone came back, my balls grew back to normal size, and my skin became rougher. But my social anxiety vanished almost immediately. I can go outside now without fear. It feels more natural and carefree to live as a male, even if it’s not perfect. I don’t have to worry about passing or taking medication for the rest of my life.
However, I still struggle. I don’t regret transitioning because I learned so much about myself, but I have regrets about the time and energy I lost. I still have a desire sometimes to be a woman, and I get jealous of the ease with which women can express femininity. I have body dysmorphia; I hate the idea of being a masculine, hairy man. I don’t want to be a "manly man," but I’ve accepted that I can be a feminine gay man. Now, my goal is to focus on other parts of life—traveling, learning, and finding happiness in things other than romance. I’m trying to accept that I might never have a partner, and that’s okay. Life is about more than gender.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 7 | Realized I was attracted to men (gay). |
| Childhood/Teens | Bullied for being a feminine boy; had a poor relationship with my father who hated that I was gay. |
| 23 | Started taking estrogen (HRT). |
| 23-29 | Lived as a trans woman for 6 years. Developed breasts and a more feminine appearance, but also severe social anxiety and isolation. |
| 29 | Stopped HRT and began detransitioning socially. |
| 31 (Present) | Two years off hormones. Living as a male, focusing on self-acceptance as a feminine gay man. |
Top Comments by /u/Entire-Construction1:
When I was trans, I have avoided all sorts of friendship with other transwoman. I also experience what you said, most of them wanted to be the most beautiful creature in the world and have all the men they want.
They are super attention seekers and badmouth not just trans but also cis girls saying that they are much more feminine and attractive than them.
They love showing their surgical boobs and hips in social media. Not all but most of them always deceive men, particularly foreign nationals, for money or just simple self validation that they passed as a woman.
Part of the reason why I detransed is because I could not relate to them at all...
Sorry but i have to say this, This is what most transwomen/gay men including myself fall into the trap of transitioning even if they do not have gender dysphoria. They want a straight relationship with a straight man even most of the time straight men would only want a biological woman. Right now, im learning to love myself as a male who happens to be attracted to a male. No need to transform myself just to validate that i can romantically love another man. Its internalize homophobia all this time. I wish i could have realize this sooner.
A lot of us took HRT to escape the mistreatment of being an effeminate gay male. Regardless, once people clock or knew you are trans you will be just treated as a feminine gay male again, so it's not really worth it and you're just adding stress to your body and wallet....
Are you gay? Do you have porn addiction? How was your overall relationship with your father, uncle, brothers? Are you naturally feminine for a guy? Do you hate your appearance as a guy?
You see there are lots of underlying issues than just concluding ourselves as trans. All of these questions I asked was actually the reason why I felt like or supposed to be a woman before. I still suffer from dysphoria but not greatly since Im already trying to accept my reality that I would never be a woman and wont be treated as such. Cis people (even gays) have better dating options, less likely to be discriminated and more opportunities in career and social life.
Even transpeople say they don't want to be trans but they couldn't stop being trans. Why? Because they are kept fed with this BS that they will become the opposite sex with enough hormones and surgery. Somebody is giving them hope that they could escape the gender they are and hated. No we can't and we will all die one day regardless of our gender, so why not just enjoy life and focus on other things than chasing this impossible dream.
I am still personally in the belief however that alot of modern "trans"women are actually gay men that either internalized hate or homophobia or simply got lead down an extreme path.
Not sure about that, it probably depends on the location and culture of the population. Like for example here in Philippines or Thailand, most transwomen are gay men (including me) who transitioned because of internalized homophobia due to being brainwashed by religion that Gay is bad and sinful and etc.. But in countries where being gay is more accepted like in US, majority of the transwomen there are AGP straight males.
Im in 5 years hrt injections and after stopping i could feel my balls grew larger about 1.4x the size (it was very small during hrt) after stopping hormones for 3 weeks already.
You are only 7 months, i think your balls could recover normally... dont overthink for now, wait for 2 months
Also i think some people use Clomid to kick start their T production and probably help with your problem for now. you can search that, drwillpower also uses that on his detrans mtftm patients
im a fresh male detrans... i also reached passability and deemed as a beautiful asian girl. but i also have developed extreme social anxiety (feeling fake, scared being clocked) once i reached my peak transitioning hence going detrans. Right now i feel better, cause it feels natural and carefree to live as my AGAB but i still am jealous of girls.. Honestly You look so hot in both presentation, why would you give up also being trans? Are you planning to have gynecomastia surgery?
No matter how much people will reaffirm you that you could be the opposite sex, it is now than never to accept that you could never change you sex. Dont fall into the trap that transwomen are women and transmen are men. People will treat you differently. Kind ones will give you unnecessary sympathy and will play along with your delusion while rude ones, well ya already know how awful they are to transpeople. You can try estrogen, dress and present like a woman and nothing is wrong with these things but do not feel entitled that you can invade female only spaces. Also any kind of surgery should be taken in serious consideration and not only based on how you feel.
Life is not all about genders. Your character, unique personality and your goals are much more important than focusing on your gender.
When i was trans, my anxiety was always very bad to the point that i never go outside and scared to be seen by people. When i go out, I cover up my body with hoodie, mask and wear hat and tie my long hair. I lost any social contact during my trans life and got stucked in my career as im scared to show in an interview as trans, like how could i explain to the interviewer what i am, lol...
Detransing cured all of this, i could now go outside without. covering myself from head to toe and could talk to a stranger without any anxiety anymore.
It's very tempting to focus on one aspect of being a woman (the ease of acquiring dates
Yes, but I'm not sure about this since from what I've seen from statistics and anecdotes from transpersons, dating wasn't any easier it actually becomes harder. Only less 3% of straight cis person would date a trans, around 40-50% for bi people would. That's why T4T is a more popular option for them.