Ethical? No, absolutely not.

The lack of in-depth discussions on side effects, complications, risks, and alternate treatments is borderline criminal. The insistence that any discussion of any of these topics is little more than bigotry is a gross disservice.

Honestly, maybe a class action lawsuit would instill needed change. I'm not sure, I'm no lawyer, but it springs to mind.

People are fragile these days in general. It's not unique nor more particularly prevalent in trans/detrans individuals. The internet, especially in recent times, has created a culture of perpetual victimhood.

People are rewarded socially, politically, and even financially, for being a victim. There's an immediate garnering of support that occurs when someone claims they have been through a rough time or part of a "marginalized" group. Entire projects have been successful by pandering to such a concept. When I was fully out as trans, I had a swath of individuals who would rush to my defense for no other reason than me having that as part of my identity. The same goes for "people of color" (a term I rather abhore), gays, etc. And because we cater to these so much, these people have figured out that they can get immediate validation, sympathy, support, and much more by whining and crying.

Now, the flip side to this is that there are a lot more unbelievably fragile people these days. Genuinely, not just pretending for social points. And I think a lot of that has to do with the above, the overall culture war, and the lack of conversations around the strength of character and maturing as a necessary fact of life. It's a very deep topic that you could write a doctorate's thesis on, but we're generally weaker as a species.

If trans/detrans individuals are more fragile it's likely because Dysphoria targets the very conceptualization of self. When someone doesn't even have a foundation of who or what they are, any conflict can unmoore them. Stability comes from a strong foundation, which often comes from a strong sense of self, the very thing Dysphoria, especially Gender Dysphoria, damages.

However, I can guarantee you that regardless of what community you try to engage with, you will find similar meltdowns and tendencies. Especially on Reddit, Twitter, and Tumblr.

It's because you terrify them.

For a couple of reasons. One, if someone else can feel regret and end up detransitioning or feeling perhaps even worse than they did prior to transitioning then THEY can too. It's a representation that the path that they are on isn't the sure-shot path to happiness that they've likely been convinced that it is.

Two, if transitioning isn't always right, then some of the friends that have transitioned and then died may have died, in part, as a result of their guidance or encouragement. The guilt from knowing you encouraged a friend to do something that may have led to their death can be overwhelming and devastating.

If detransitioners exist and they exist for legitimate reasons and are growing in numbers, it can shake the very foundation which many of these folk have built their identity and worldview on. It can be emotionally and psychologically painful to be ripped back to reality like that. Which is, coincidentally, exactly why more people need to hear about stories like yours, and mine, and the others on this subreddit and beyond it.

If we want the best outcomes for the most amount of people it is absolutely vital that people understand the risks, the issues, the pitfalls, the dangers, and the complications with all of this. We can't permit them to label and dismiss, to discount, or to ignore. For their own safety and fulfillment as well as everything else.

And it's hard. Very hard. Just try not to break yourself in half trying to convince folk. This is a marathon, not a sprint, and it's going to take a lot more work by a lot more people to make positive change. You're speaking out, you're talking to people, that is enough. Try to keep your head held high and understand that a lot of their response has to do with them, not you.

You can be feminine and enjoy being treated like a woman without being female, my dear.

Feminine men, autogynephelia, sissyfication, theres a whole entire subgenre of fetishes, kinks, and sexual preferences that fall into this sort of thing. All enjoyed by men, sometimes even completely straight men.

What you have to ask yourself is, "is it feeling feminine that I enioy, or do I consider myself a woman?". Try to decouple the concepts of femininity and masculinity from sex when asking the question. Dont worry about stereotypes or societal trends. There is no wrong answer. You can enjoy and love everything youve mentioned and still be completely male. It can mean youre trans, but it isnt an indicator on its own.

Ask yourself how you feel about your body. You might be turned on by the idea of having a vagina, but do you hate your penis? Do you feel repulsed by the person in the mirror, absent of any makeup, prosthetics, or clothing? If you do, why? Is it the maleness, or something else? Ask yourself these sorts of questions and listen carefully. Be prepared for an answer you may not be expecting, and may not even like. The answers will help guide you to the right answer. Look beyong the surface level to see what youve got ticking away underneath.

Above all... i encourage caution. Don't rush it. You can always transition later. But once you start, the impacts grow more and more permanent. Take your time, find the answer that works best for you. Dont let peers or the culture impact your decision. Work it through with a partner or a close friend. Sleep on it and Journal your thoughts.

You'll find what is true for you. Then once you're sure, you can act or not act accordingly.

Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best and lots of love. Take care of yourself

While I don't disagree with the conclusion, the methodology used to reach said conclusion is not good.

We need to be careful. Since we're facing an uphill battle with a lot of this, using bad research to support pushing back will only hurt the discussion in the long run. It will be used to label and dismiss.

Your answer lies in the novel way gender is being used. Gender, as used by acedemics and popular media these days, refers to the general expression of masculine and geminine traits and roles associated with them. This is how the terms are theoretically distinct.

Think of it like one's temperment except as related specifically related to feminine or masculine behavior. The proposition is that all of this behavior as it relates to sex is socially constructed. Ergo, there is nothing biological about how feminine or masculine traits relate to sex.

I disagree. While it is useful, i think, to decouple the idea of masculine and feminine expression from sex to free people of the box. I do not believe that these correlations came purely from culture. Culture formed out of our collective behavior, not the other way around, and there are absolutely physiological trends that correlate and explain why women are by and large vastly more feminine and men masculine. Gender is neither a binding concept nor as trivial and arbitrary as the social constructionists claim.

A lot of it is a semantics and linguistics game. But hopefully, this helps understand what is being argued and why.

Edit: Spelling corrections.

The reason that you're seeing so much negativity is that for the individuals in this community, a lot of people were misled and hurt.

There is an ideology around transitioning. That isn't to say that trans individuals 'aren't real', but that much of what's going on right now isn't based in science, nor care for the individual. People aren't just not having conversations about what is important, they are actively shutting them down. People aren't really permitted to discuss the risks, side effects, and alternate treatments in public discourse. It's shot down and the person is labeled as a bigot.

There is no one cause for gender dysphoria. Grief, internalized homophobia, autism, and so many more things can cause these feelings. It's not limited to trans individuals. I would go as far as to say MOST people feel dysphoria and dysmorphia towards their body at some point in their life. The degree varies, the reason varies.

Because there are a thousand reasons a person could be questioning their gender, there are a thousand solutions. People often talk about transitioning as if it is not only the best solution but the only real solution. This isn't true, and for many people, the transition isn't going to help them because the feelings they are feeling have a different source.

In order to figure out what is right for you, you have to ask yourself some hugely important questions and realize a few things. You can be feminine without being female, you can be masculine without being male, and you can experience and display a whole spectrum of one, both, or neither without being trans. Femboys, sissies, tomboys, etc. There are a hundred different ways to express one's self that wouldn't be considered 'standard', but are perfectly ok. You have to ask yourself, "What am I wanting to get out of transitioning? How do I feel about my body, and why? What do I see as the end goal?"

Have a heart-to-heart with yourself. What is it you want to express? What is it that you want to overcome? Try to visualize what you want to be detached from gender and sex entirely. Do you hate your body, your penis? If so, why? Is it because of the 'maleness', or something else that you could work on, like weight or cleanliness? Or perhaps it's more about self-esteem?

Some people just need therapy, honest conversations, and time to overcome. That's what it was for me, and now I'm a happy drag queen who is completely fine in my own body. Other people need to tackle their preconceived notions of sex and realize that there might be trends and phenotypes but they aren't litmus tests that you have to follow, that it is indeed fine to be different. Some need to work on eating healthier and exercising, cleaning themselves and their room, and exercising control over their life.

I always advise caution. Explore some of these questions, and have a heart-to-heart with yourself and someone who is close to you. Transitioning can always happen later, but once you start, the steps get more and more permanent by the day. So make sure that you are sure. If you are sure and you determine exactly what it is that you want and are looking for and that transitioning is the way to achieve it, make sure you read up. Understand the risks, understand the potential side effects, and understand how far you want to go. The 'longer you wait the worse the returns are' is a myth. A good doctor and surgeon can get you squared away regardless of your age. Take your time, ask questions of yourself and others, and try not to let society (including bigots, or your vehemently pro-trans friends) steer you. You'll find the right path to walk in time.

Above all though, take care of yourself. You'll find a way forward, I have faith. Lots of love to you.

Absolutely. I've talked about that whenever this forum mentions the detransphobia that people experience. It's much the same problem. Any acknowledgment of an issue is seen as giving "Conservatives a win" and so they'll hold to the point at any cost, even at the cost of the very people they claim to be fighting for.

I appreciate your insight. Nothing wrong with getting your copy off the back of a digital truck either.

The act of transitioning when it isn't the right solution for the individual can lead to decreased mental health and a higher risk of suicide.

The lack of transitioning when it IS the right solution can lead to decreased mental health and higher risk of suicide.

This sort of nonsense is why I tend to say that trans activists rarely actually care about trans people. This is not an all-or-nothing consideration, nor is it dichotomous. Pumping the breaks, trying to rule out false positives, exploring alternate treatments and options, and letting people know the dangers and risks of all options available can only help potentially trans individuals.

But acknowledging that would require these self-aggrandizing fools (the aforementioned zealous activists) to put down their spear of righteous indignation and actually engage with other humans. Far too often, they are more concerned about their moral crusade so that they can look good to their peers than they are about the actual problem at hand.

To acknowledge our existence as genuine and our suffering real is to "give the other side a win". These people will defend their 'side' and hold the banner high, no matter how many corpses and broken lives it leaves in its wake. They don't love us, and they usually don't love the trans individuals they claim to represent. They just hate others.

I empathize wholeheartedly and I feel for you. The problem is that far too many in that camp have prioritized "winning" over helping the individuals they claim to care about. While this isn't exactly new in the realm of politics for any group, it's gotten extremely bad on the left within the past twenty years.

You're not alone. There are MANY who feel disenfranchised by the current state of the left-wing and there are a large volume of content creators that I know who would have been considered staunch liberals back in the day now find themselves lumped in with moderate conservatives. I myself was shoved rather decisively to the right by this very phenomenon. Though I think I would be considered more conservative regardless, the actions of my former peers absolutely sped me along.

It's become a sort of new religion. Zealous, dogmatic, and obsessed with propagation. Speaking out is certainly scary. There are many supposedly compassionate individuals who become absolutely vicious and nasty at the sight of disagreement. I remember a few years ago Laci Green (a rather radical left-wing activist to this very day in terms of beliefs) was absolutely thrown under the bus for having the audacity to speak to the other side. Her beliefs hadn't changed, but opening a dialogue was all it took for the mob to turn.

My usual advice to those who are afraid to speak out is to try and find a content creator that vocalizes what you want to say and signal boost them. It can be useful. Perhaps ShoeOnHead, Chris Ray Gun, Nuance Bro, or someone similar.

Part of me has wanted to start a channel discussing a lot of this but it's beyond the scope of what I have time for at the moment. There are those out there though.