This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or not a real detransitioner/desister.
The user provides highly specific, consistent, and personal medical and psychological details over a two-year period (e.g., being on T for a decade, stopping due to health issues, changes in libido, and ongoing social re-adjustment). The language is nuanced, emotionally varied (from supportive to regretful to analytical), and reflects the complex, often non-linear experience of detransition, which is difficult to fabricate convincingly.
About me
I'm a masculine female who started testosterone over a decade ago, partly to avoid the negative attention I got for being with my girlfriend. I was on it for ten years until it made me physically ill, and I had top surgery which I don't regret much. I've stopped hormones and now live as a masculine person who uses all pronouns, not really identifying as a man or a woman. The hardest part has been the complete loss of my sex drive and sexual function since stopping, which has barely improved. My main focus now is just on my health and moving forward.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition and detransition has been long and complicated. It started over a decade ago when I decided to begin taking testosterone. I was a masculine female, what some would call butch, and a lot of my friends at the time were also transitioning. I never really stopped thinking of myself as a biological female, but I lived my life passing as a man. I think a part of it was that I was tired of the negative attention I’d get when I was with a girlfriend in public; transitioning made that stop.
I was on testosterone for about ten years. I stopped because it was making me physically ill and I started worrying about long-term health problems. My body just couldn't handle it anymore. I had a lot of physical dysphoria, especially with my breasts, and I did get top surgery in my late twenties. That’s the one thing I don’t have strong regrets about. Occasionally I feel a bit of regret, but it’s the least of my concerns.
After I stopped T, I didn’t really socially detransition. I still pass as a man and live with a masculine identity. I don’t go out of my way to be seen as female, and the idea of looking more feminine doesn’t appeal to me. I don’t have a gender identity anymore—not as a woman or a man. I’m just somewhere in between. I don’t introduce myself with he/him pronouns anymore; I tell people I use all pronouns. I guess I just want to be seen as a butch person now.
The biggest physical change after stopping T was my sex drive. It completely disappeared. Before T, I had a high sex drive. On T, it was normal. But after stopping, it plummeted to almost nothing. It’s been two years now, and it’s only come back a tiny bit. It takes me a long time to orgasm, and when I do, it feels very mild and disappointing. My clit isn't as sensitive as it used to be. I also took finasteride for about five years, and I think stopping both medications at the same time might have caused this problem. I’ve talked to other people who have had the same experience.
My periods came back within a few months of stopping T, and my estrogen levels returned to normal. I didn’t have a hysterectomy or have my ovaries removed, so I don't think I'm infertile, but the sexual dysfunction has been really hard to deal with.
Looking back, I don’t think I transitioned because of internalized homophobia, but I did have a hard time with my parents about my gender and being bisexual. I also think the definition of what it means to be trans changes all the time, and that influenced things. I believe people should have the right to be gender nonconforming without discrimination, but I don’t think medical treatments should be given without a thorough process to make sure it’s the right choice.
I have some generalized regret about my transition, but it’s not overwhelming. My main focus now is on my health. I went to a regular, trauma-informed therapist who wasn’t involved in transgender care, and that was really helpful. I’d recommend that to anyone going through something similar.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Late Teens/Early 20s | Socially transitioned to live as a man. |
| Early 20s | Started testosterone (T). |
| Late 20s | Had top surgery. |
| Early 30s | Started taking finasteride. |
| 32 | Stopped testosterone and finasteride due to health problems. |
| 32 | Period returned a few months after stopping T. |
| 33-34 | Lived with a complete loss of libido and sexual function. |
| 34 | Began identifying as using all pronouns and embracing a butch/GNC identity. |
| 34 | Noted a very slight return of libido, but sexual dysfunction persisted. |
Top Comments by /u/FTMTXTtired:
Do I support the right for people to be gender nonconforming and respected for pushing boundaries of rigid gender norms? Hell yes
Do I support legal protections for said gender nonconformity - a world free of employment or housing discrimination? Of course!
Do I think gender dysphoric people should get no questions asked access to endless medical treatments to change their bodies? No. There needs to be some system in place to make sure only the people who are most likely to benefit will get the treatment.
I could have written this myself down to the consultation for a release surgery. Im glad I didnt get any genital surgery.
I went off T after a decade and also grew my hair out.
I still live as a guy but Ive been off T a year now and my face and shape is a little more fem so I am wondering now if I dont pass as a man as often.
But I also dont care much about how the world perceives me anymore.
I dont have a gender identity anymore either. Not as a woman or a man. I am in between
Im so sorry to hear this. Please feel some confidence that you can move through these feelings. Your life isnt over and with time these feelings may feel less extreme. But for now the feelings are real and you deserve help and to acknowledge the feelings
If you are making plans/feeling very at risk then yes you should be seeking help.
Remember you are still young and you could always do the surgery at a later date.
Personally, I had a lot of physical dysphoria with my breasts that I lived with for 15 years. I was late 20s when I got my surgery. Even I occasionally feel a bit of regret.
Im 1.5 years off T after nearly a decade on. My libido disappeared. I used to have a normal sex drive. Now I have almost no desire. I can still have an orgasm but it feels like almost nothing, very mild, and takes me 5 times as long as it used to when I was on T.
And before T I had a high sex drive
I initially found this subreddit really hard to read and some of the posts jarring because it challenged my beliefs and the language I was accustomed to seeing.
I was open to being uncomfortable and learning about other people's experiences and point of view though.
Sex usually just means someone's biology and whether they have eggs or sperm - reproductive capacity
Are you sure you are infertile? Have you had your sperm tested?
I am sorry
I went off T over a year ago and I still pass fully. I was on T for a decade and stopped cos of gyno pain also.... If you pass well which I assume you do from your story, then you probably could keep passing for 2 more years. Or bite the bullet and tell people you are detrans but it might be to your advantage to stay socially transitioned in a masc environment
Dont go into any personal details at all. Simply say you are going by (blank) name and pronouns now. And at the most, you could say that if anyone has questions you are open to chatting further.
Most people will just move on and not make a big deal about it
Im really sorry. You should find a therapist or a good friend to process your grief with. That is so shitty