They have 100% taken that from the saying “gay people have been around for thousands of years”, leaving out of the conversation the fact that same-sex attraction doesn’t need any “help” from others to exist. Being homosexual or bisexual isn’t a mental issue that causes distress in itself, at worst the distress comes from the homophobic views of others, so the comparison shouldn’t be made. Medical transition hasn’t been around for thousands of years. Actually identifying as the opposite sex - not out of survival in sexist conditions - has been very rare in history. Now what has existed for thousands of years ? Gender non conforming people.

Brains are neuroplastic, in many ways we are influenced by our environment and culture (in this case specifically the “culture” of gender and the roles that come with it) so this is yet again showing us that there is no such thing as a male or female brain. Our early years in a society that shapes us to be one way or another depending on our sex is what determine these results. Individuals from one sex can differ from one another and have brains similar to the scans seen from the other sex, that’s our individualities showing. I will be happier when everyone will understand that our sex isn’t determining or limiting anything, only gender is. Thanks for sharing !

For what it’s worth, being a feminist and a woman, especially a lesbian, will get you called “transphobic”. I stopped caring about being called that the minute I realised that gender activism is a deeply sexist and yes homophobic movement. This doesn’t mean that trans people do not exist, it just means that the current and dominant branch of activism around trans ppl is counter productive to progressive ideas, relating deeply on the traditions and the status quo (minus the idea that ppl must be “cis”).

As a radical feminist I do believe that there are people who really are trans, however I think they’re rare, have actual sex dysphoria, need years of therapy to know what’s actual dysphoria and what is other problems and circumstances that have caused symptoms that can be read as dysphoria but ultimately can be resolved in other ways. Transphobia exists however that’s barely ever the oppression talked about in trans related stories/articles : it is not having their correct sex mentioned for one reason or another, or being told you cannot play a certain sport with people of the opposite sex, it is being refused a job, a flat/house, being disrespected, mocked irl, bullied, harmed, simply for identifying as trans.

It’s strong sexism. Short haired girls and women used to be at least kind of protected from the assumption that we were “failed” women within leftist spaces, we had feminist and lesbian and alternative music spaces to be ourselves without having people assuming we were doing something wrong as women who like having our hair short or wearing clothes usually associated with men. Now even these spaces aren’t safe anymore. All the while right wing people of course didn’t change their sexist behaviour, meaning the alienation got worse. It’s nearly inescapable now. Gender activism is an enemy to gender non conforming people, they push weird ideas about what makes a woman a woman and a man a man, preferring stereotypes to a reality they don’t want to accept.

That’s obvious autogynephilia, it’s a fetish mostly born out of sexist stereotypes around the sexuality of women. If you watch porn you should stop it as given what this fetish is about you will be pushed into watching sissy porn and very quickly will be brainwashed into thinking you’re what they call “an egg” (someone, most of the times male, who doesn’t know yet that they’re trans and whose “egg” will crack at some point). So many people are porn addicts these days and given how the brain is neuroplastic (meaning it’s rewired constantly with what you go through, what you put yourself through) obviously it can influence or solidify your sexual fantasies. Why would anyone want to be the other sex in order to live certain fantasies ? As if those fantasies weren’t achievable as their actual sex ? Wanting to be passive during sex is something men can want and do. Wishing to be a woman to experience it only means the man sees women as submissive, as sexual objects who can be only be good for penetration. So again, it’s sexism.

Ironic for me to say this as I’ve been spending the last three hours on social media but to know yourself better you must take time for yourself away from social media. A social media addiction, just like a porn addiction, can make you look obsessively at content that really has the ability to change your personality. In psychology it’s a well known fact that repetition means “will like more and more what they’re exposed to”. It’s dangerous. You feeling weird when people even using she/her pronouns (that they didn’t use before) should be indicative that there’s a cognitive dissonance here. Now I’m reminded I’m supposed to be off social media all week except for the 45 minutes a day I allow myself to have, so I’ll leave with just this : have a special interest away from internet. You’ll find more clarity within yourself thanks to that.

Honestly, looking at picture 2 and 3, you are too harsh about yourself. All I see is an alternative kid, trying to be happy and like many of us, failing. It’s not visible on the pictures. You looked like a normal teenager. As for now after your transition ? You won’t feel miserable for ever. It was a mistake and people (including our very gendered society) pushed you to make that mistake. It doesn’t have to define you for the rest of your life. You can advocate for better options, for a different path, and while you won’t be completely the same as the girl you were on these pictures you’re still going to be you, just a more recent version, one that can heal and hug the girl you were. Grief is normal but eventually you’ll find the light again.

It’s very much a problem to say that there are men’s cuts and women’s cuts, as this falling right into gender stereotypes. This goes double when you realise that they charge “women’s cuts” more than “men’s cuts”, the prices should depending on the length of the hair, not the person’s sex. For the rest, indeed there’s ways to be respectful of everyone without being ridiculous. Talking about male and female anatomy is fine and scientifically accurate.

If you look at it closely the trans men community is now heavily overlapping with the emo and more generally alt scene and I’d say it’s because a lot of it is about angst. I don’t like it all because it feels like being a masc girl in the punk, goth, emo scenes is a recipe to fall into the trap of a trans identity. These used to be safe spaces for gender non conformity, for both women and men, pushing against the norms and the pressure to change ourselves, now it too often feels dogmatic, sexist, regressive. It’s a shame because that scene was and still is to some degree such a refreshing environment, especially when young and first starting to form your own opinions, and of course blasting good music and having the best aesthetic. You cannot escape the sort of glorification of gender now, when the whole thing should be “fuck gender, nobody loves gender, your sex doesn’t determine how you look what you wear what you do !!”

Having a community is not gone, it’s something that you build with others who share the same experiences, so think of it this way : you can now as a desisted woman be part of the growing community of detransitionners and desisters. If you are a gnc woman who’s political about your journey this can be part of the larger community of feminists saying “fuck off” to anyone who think women must be feminine. Showing the diversity of womanhood. That’s incredibly important and it’s a community no different than others. The message is “we’re here, we exist, we’re women just the same”. Personally I’m dreaming of seeing the rise a large gnc women community (but can be true for gnc men as well) in the years to come.