started with a doctor when i turned 18, but i was on “back market” hrt when i was 16 by a group trans people, who groomed me and gave me hormones and blockers.

i was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ocd, cptsd, bpd and the only option given was drugs and more “therapy”.

human brains aren’t fully matured until 25, which is still very young to make such decisions. if it’s an issue with the mind, we know the mind can change why permanent changes to the body?

now about to be 25, i’m clean, physically and mentally healthy enough to realize i was in no way able to make a conformed conscious decision.

i’m just saying if the system really cared about people, this is an interesting way of showing it.

they PROFIT millions off of “transifying” people to the point of life long commitment if they go so far. even older trans people are even detransitioning (most not even possible after the damage) from regret.

i agree with you sentiment, but if we started with the focus on the healthcare industry and mental health resources before we started transifying humans in the first place.

as a femme gay man, who was a transwoman for years…

i learned about how minority of men treat, react and view women and feminine bodies. personally, it was validating and i fed of the attention until it wasn’t anymore. i realized what was really happening. i was an object of desire for them, they didn’t care about me other than my physical beauty.

if you’re looking for long term or even meaningful relationships, i promise you it won’t be with someone who is attracted into trans people. most if not all men who are into transwomen or femme men comes from porn. a dominance thing. straight men will never take you seriously because trans is a costume of the opposite sex. you’re basically a fetish toy to those men.

as a femme boy growing up i was sexualized and groomed by many older gay men. it internalized into homophobia because i was afraid of being sexually abused (again). yet in my years of transition it was even worse. i was a product and men used me as such.

now since detransition, i’ve honestly decided to remove myself and my value with being in a romantic relationships with men because i’m having to understand who i am first, and my identity to the world now. i’m still quite a feminine man and get called “pretty” often. odd looks (interested and/or confused) in male spaces

i wish i could give you more advice but i can give you some hope that you will attract the same energy, you give to the world.

if you are yourself, you will find someone who is authentic. you will treat you like a human being. it takes time, so in the meantime, put that want for love into yourself. most gay relationships happen older in age honestly, we are a smaller population so limited pickings. that’s just what it is. what you have to learn to accept as a gay man.

for me, trans isn’t worth the price and the best investment in the long run.

thank you for sharing, i agree there is much different between male and female detransition. especially on the testosterone for women. i’m still a very feminine male, i still get called “she” often even though i’ve “returned” to my natural state though i have breast that i bind.

i stand at 5’4, have a small frame and soft face, lighter voice. which is why i passed well and why i still get misgendered. i still get double takes in the male’s bathroom. so we are still on similar fields. i definitely present less feminine than before, because of my safety around men. i’ve been bullied and ostracized from men since a child, which is what causes my dysphoria. we’re just moving opposite spectrums because of our different in sex ofc. yet i still embrace my “feminine” because it’s ingrained in my self. i was mainly raised by women and only socialized with women still til this day.

i’ve also had to change many mannerisms, why i speak, interact and physically look since detransition for my safety and identity.

everyone’s experiences are valid and individual, those are my thoughts only. some relate, some will not.

i hear you but i think we’re talking about different things then. i meant what’s normalized in context of social ideologies. not in what’s normal in human biology, psychology, etc. historically societies have normalized many things we now deem as taboo now. things we normalize now we might not consider normal in the future.

yes, i agree i like you brought up the plastic surgery part, its the same industry that plays on people’s insecurities for profit and absolutely, society treats you different based on all aspects of self. attractive, unattractive, poor, wealthy, black, white, gay, straight …etc for me, the sacrifice of myself wasn’t worth it. it’s wasn’t a fulfilling or sustainable life.

i hear you too, yet still disagree. ofc gender and biology are two sides of the same coin. gender is the social construct, “boys blues, girls pink”

trans ideology blended the two. cross sex hormones and surgeries to physically altering biology for the aesthetic of the two sexes. yes people saw me as the opposite sex but i wasn’t. it wasn’t “normal” either just because it looked like it. what we think of ourselves definitely matters though. it’s a balance.

i made the post to say screw normal and be yourself whether that’s typically “normal” or different. you’re allowed to feel and think as you do ofc but i don’t subscribe to that mentality.

i agree with that sentiment deeply, it was the same for me as well. until i realized our ideal of “normal” is abnormal, consistently changing in many ways. if normal is subjective then we should change our own definition of normal that allows for your values and freedom.

oh yes, i agree well thought out comment and good insight, thank you!

i didn’t expand on that but i just wanted to hit on the stem of passing for trans ideology and the regressiveness specifically for gnc people trying to “fit in”. i should have stated that.