This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic and does not raise serious red flags of being a bot or a bad-faith actor.
Reasons for Authenticity:
- Consistent, Knowledgeable Perspective: The comments consistently offer nuanced, detailed advice about detransition, mental health, and gender ideology, reflecting a deep understanding of the community's concerns.
- Empathetic and Supportive Tone: The user engages with others' struggles in a compassionate, personalized manner, offering practical steps and emotional support, which is atypical for bots.
- Natural Language: The writing style is complex, uses colloquialisms ("thot" for thought, "LOL"), and shows a natural flow of ideas, making a scripted or AI-generated origin unlikely.
While the user's passion and criticism of transgender activism are strong, they align with the stated experiences of many genuine detransitioners and desisters who feel harmed. There is no evidence suggesting the account is not a real person with these views.
About me
I was born female and my discomfort started young, tied to anxiety and a struggle with societal expectations of women. I began taking testosterone at 23, hoping it would be an escape and help me find my true self. But the promised relief never came, and I only felt more disconnected, realizing my issues were with internalized homophobia and other psychological pain, not my body itself. I stopped hormones after six months and began to socially detransition. Now I'm learning to accept myself as a lesbian woman and see that my body was never the real problem.
My detransition story
My journey with transition and detransition was a long and complicated one, rooted in a lot of confusion and a desperate search for an answer to my pain. I was born female, and from a young age, I felt a deep discomfort with myself and my place in the world. I now see that a lot of my feelings were tied to other issues I was struggling with, like anxiety and obsessive thought patterns, which latched onto the idea of gender as an explanation.
I started by identifying as non-binary, which felt like a safer way to explore these feelings without fully committing. But the discomfort only grew, and I became convinced that medical transition was the only way to become my "true self." I took testosterone for a period of time. I was about 23 when I started. It felt like an escape from the person I was, a way to become someone completely new. I hated my breasts and the way my body developed during puberty; it felt alien and wrong.
During this time, I was heavily influenced by what I saw online. The communities I was in were overwhelmingly supportive of transition, painting it as the ultimate form of self-actualization. There was very little critical discussion about the medical side of things—dosages, side effects, or the reality of surgeries. It was frightening how little solid information was available, and how much we were all just guessing.
But even after starting hormones, that feeling of relief and authenticity I was promised never came. Instead, I felt more disconnected than ever. The obsessive thoughts didn't go away; they just found a new thing to fixate on. I started to realize that my desire to transition might have been a way to cope with deeper issues. I had a lot of internalized homophobia to unpack. I am attracted to women, and I think a part of me struggled with the idea of being a gay woman. Being a "straight man" felt like an easier, more accepted identity to inhabit. It was an escape.
I also began to understand that a lot of my discomfort wasn't with being female itself, but with the rigid expectations society places on women. I didn't want to be confined to a role. Transitioning felt like a way to break free from that, but it was a solution that didn't address the root problem.
I stopped taking testosterone after about six months. I was 24. The changes to my body were a constant reminder of a path I knew was wrong for me. My voice had dropped, and I had more facial hair, and I worried these things were permanent. It took time for my body to start readjusting. My natural hormone levels needed time to balance back out.
I don't regret exploring transition because it led me to where I am now, which is a place of much greater self-understanding. But I do regret not having access to non-affirming therapy sooner. I needed someone to help me question why I felt the way I did, not just affirm my feelings without scrutiny. I needed to talk about my anxiety, my OCD tendencies, and my past, not just my gender.
Now, I see that my body was never the problem. The problem was a society that tells us there's only a narrow way to be a woman, and a culture that offers medicalization as a quick fix for deep-seated psychological pain. I am learning to accept my body as it is. I am a woman, and I am a lesbian, and that is okay. I am finally starting to feel like myself again.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 23 | Started identifying as non-binary |
| 23 | Began taking testosterone |
| 24 | Stopped testosterone after ~6 months |
| 24 | Began the process of social detransition |
Top Comments by /u/FutureNeverComes:
No one owes you 'a compelling argument'.
People come to this sub because they are looking to connect with other detransitoners, discuss issues, get different perspectives, gather information, tell their stories about questioning/transitioning/detransitioning/etc.
They are entitled to spend their time as they wish.
Why come here and ask a passive-aggressive question?
Ever "dysphoric" is an individual. No one here has ever stated they know what is best for others.
If the content of the sub is of no use to you then don't read it. No one owes you an explanation for the experiences, advice, commentary or communications between people on this sub.
That you have worked out your 'theory' at 19, I think, is unusually perceptive and awesomely introspective. I get the feeling you do know yourself. Quite well.
In that same vein and based on the other things you've mentioned, perhaps there is you and that 'female part' is essentially the programmed homophobia.
"If I'm a man and I dig men then I must be . . .", "If I am a man and I enjoy/appreciate a particular softness about myself then that must mean . . " . . you know the rest.
It's complete BS.
You don't need a label to live your life, explore your interests and desires, love yourself and enjoy the laughter and love of other men.
Many adventures await.
There is a logical fallacy, referred to in the vernacular as, "no true Scotsman”.
It refers to the tactic of comparing the actions, words, or beliefs of one person of a named group to all people of that same group.
So for example, “All Scotsman love haggis.”, “My friend John is Scottish and he hates haggis”, “Ah, yes, but no true Scotsman hates haggis.”
Or more commonly: “Our religion is a kind, peaceful and loving one. People committing evil acts are not loving, kind and peaceful so they can't really be a true member of our religion, no matter what they say.”
The use of this logical fallacy allows a person to dismiss whatever the "alleged" group members say, do or experience because the have already been defined as and assumed to be “fakes” who have been lying to themselves and others.
While this belief may reinforce someone’s certainty they are ‘special and different’, or more ‘real and authentic’, what it provides to others is an opportunity for observation.
Why the evidently ubiquitous need to compete with others in this context?
Why the need to dismiss other people’s experiences?
Why the desire for some sort of mythical purity of ‘transness’?
It is nothing but a defence using projection. There is true and pure ‘transness’. It is innate and only the true ones will bear the burden and fight the good fight.
If I am an example of the true, the pure, the good and the right trans-wise then all people who do not have my experience, follow my path, agree with my conclusions, etc. can’t possibly be what I am.
This is a type of psychological isolation. It is used to keep contradictory information from colliding with beliefs (aka unevaluated shit you or someone else made up).
It also serves to create a place for martyrdom, victimhood and righteous indignation to flourish.
Detransitioners have to be stoned in the public square because their actual fucking ‘true’ existence is the game changer nobody wants at the game.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=74&v=NZR64EF3OpA
Maybe you are doing them a service by exposing them to a thoughtful young woman who has gone thru this mental and emotional trip and has come to this conclusion as will many other people.
It is not your job to 'not disappoint' a doctor or therapist. If these people were excited for you in a way that goes beyond a general appreciation for you ‘making a decision you thot would make you happy' kind of thing then as you know, that would be a bit beyond their purview.
Neither of these people are entitled to "not be disappointed" by their patients. It doesn't work that way. I’m sure they both care in a professional sense but beyond that, they likely do not have any vested interest/caring in what you do at all.
As for everybody else, I'm sure many people would make a good argument for being straight forward but . . you could just ignore it and go about your days. If someone comes out and directly questions something, just mumble, "oh yeah, don't know, not sure, still thinking about it, blah"
When you feel ready, you can say whatever you need to say, to the people that matter. You aren’t under any obligation to make pronouncements or divulge your personal business to anyone.
Re: the "community". You have no responsibility to a group of people. That isn't even possible. You are not responsible for what two health care professionals think about trans people.
Sometimes it is hard for us to imagine that other people are not as reactive to other people's opinions or actions when we ourselves are very much like that.
You sound like a strong person. Best wishes.
An ethical therapist is neutral in the respect that what YOU decide for your life is none of her business so to speak. The job to to assist you in learning to assess and work with the issues you bring to the therapy. You are not a burden, you are a patient/client. It is her paid employment to write long letters. You do not owe your therapist anything.
It sounds like you have done a lot of 'sorting out' about your feelings. I don't know how much of what you have written here that you feel comfortable saying to her but it reads as well thot out and straight forward. You aren'y "coming out as cis" in so much as you are coming out as yourself. These are not the same sentiment.
You can back off of instagram. Stay off for a while, Most people are too busy navel gazing to notice. If these friends are people you see everyday, overtime they will know (and act like friends); otherwise, they are people on the internet. Woop.
I can assure you your doctor will not be upset you aren't taking T. Perhaps if it all comes out with the therapist, she can help you practice how to approach the doc if that is still something you are uncomfortable with by the 20th.
It is stressful to feel like you have to defend yourself all over the place but fortunately, everybody's opinions (if they even have them) will blow over and most importantly, you have a new lookout and perspective with which to move forward and have some fun!
Truth.
'Autogynephilic biological males' are not a 'standard' to which everyone else must defer with respect to their experiences in this regard.
These men have NO authority regarding the subject of gender dysphoria and biological female people nor should they be accorded any.
You appear to be asking for confirmation/validation about your appearance and for information about drugs to "feminize" your body.
Your specific questions/requests would be best posted elsewhere. This sub is for discussing detransition and supporting people in that regard.
This is a thing now. Pop on detrans sub. Condescendingly commend everyone for their 'experiences' but ensure you passive-aggressively assert that they just weren't/aren't "really trans" . . . because "confidence" in pseudo-scientific wish projection.
While I agree with the comments below, you should give some consideration to potentially receiving a response back, re: "oh, well then you weren't trans".
People with that sort of blind certitude in a "professional" capacity are more likely to protect their perceptions/ideologies over your well being.
If you are prepared for a potentially less than graciously positive and supportive acknowledgement then yes, perhaps she could do with a little reality regardless of what she chooses to do with it.
There was no anger in the post. It was not transphobic.
It is one person's attempt at opening up a conversation that needs to be had.
This is what this sub is for.
You do not have any legitimate statistics and even a not-so-lengthy read thru (for example ) the trans subs on Reddit would suggest that this "happiness" you refer to is not primarily obstructed by the imposition of other people's opinions. This is bullshit.
Trans-identified men are not women nor or they intersex. Comparing trans-identified people to intersex people is not an accurate or appropriate association or comparison. "Trans" is not a type of intersex. That is ludicrous. It is easily "deniable" because is it not correct.
Discussing issues as important as the OP's post is not transphobic. No one is obliged to "respect" anyone else's 's fantasies and religious beliefs.
"One day, you'll realize . . . "? While your condescension toward detransitioning/ed people is expected and unsurprising, you can be assured everyone has heard this script before and they are here because they know beauty and happiness don't require group think, surgery and lifetime medicalization.