This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The comments show:
- Personal Investment: The user expresses personal anger and frustration that aligns with the stated passion of someone who feels harmed by their experience.
- Consistent, Detailed Ideology: The views on gender, detransition, and societal issues are complex, nuanced, and consistent across posts.
- Natural Engagement: The user engages with others by offering book recommendations (Carl Jung) and suggesting specific subreddit actions (making a separate thread), which is typical of a genuine community member.
While the user's focus shifts to broader gender politics, this is a common perspective within the detrans community and does not indicate inauthenticity. The account behaves like a real person who is a desister/detransitioner.
About me
I started to question being a man in my early twenties because I felt society had abandoned men and viewed us with no empathy. I explored transitioning as an escape from this hopelessness, but I found communities that encouraged me to think critically about the medical risks. Through therapy and introspection, I realized my problem wasn't with my body but with the immense pressure and lack of support for men. I never medically transitioned, and I now see my dysphoria was rooted in internalized misandry and my autism making me feel out of place. I am now a man at peace, focused on healing from society's expectations instead of changing myself.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started with a deep unhappiness about being a man. I didn't see any power or privilege in it; all I saw was a life of struggle. I looked around and saw that men were failing in school more, getting harsher prison sentences, and making up most of the homeless population. I felt like society had abandoned men and boys, and there was a huge lack of empathy for our struggles. I honestly started to believe that a lot of young men, including myself, were experiencing gender dysphoria as a way to cope with feeling so unwanted and hopeless in today's world.
I hated being a man because of this perceived lack of care. It felt like no one would listen to my pain or the pain of other men without dismissing it or bringing up the "patriarchy," which felt like a complete myth to me. This feeling of being trapped and hopeless with my gender led me to question everything.
I started to explore transition, but I also spent a lot of time in online spaces that encouraged critical thinking about it. I found a community where people weren't afraid to talk about the potential harms, like how puberty blockers can affect bone and brain development, or the fact that a significant number of kids regret taking them. It was a relief to find people who understood that these are serious medical decisions, not something to be glamorized for minors online.
Through a lot of deep introspection, reading psychology, and talking to other men who had desisted or detransitioned, I began to understand my feelings better. I realized that my desire to not be a man was deeply tied to internalized misandry—a hatred for the male role I felt forced into because of how society treats men. I was running from the immense pressure and lack of support, not from my sex itself. Learning about these patterns in other men helped me feel less alone and started my healing process.
I never went through with any medical procedures. My transition was entirely social and internal, and I am so grateful for that now. I deeply regret ever believing that transition was the answer to my problems. My problems were with society's expectations and the lack of support for men, not with my body. I benefited greatly from therapy that wasn't just about affirming a new gender identity, but that helped me deconstruct these deep-seated issues and my low self-esteem.
I now believe that a huge part of my struggle was also influenced by being autistic. I saw how autistic traits express themselves differently in boys and girls, and how that can make someone feel like they don't fit into the narrow boxes society has for gender. For me, it added another layer of feeling out of place.
I don't identify as trans anymore. I am a man who has made peace with that, even though I still recognize the serious systemic issues men face. I think we need to have more open, caring conversations about why so many young people are feeling this way, instead of just rushing them down a medical path.
| Age | Date (if known) | Event |
|---|---|---|
| Early 20s | Began to experience intense discomfort with being male due to societal pressures and feelings of abandonment. | |
| Early 20s | Explored the idea of transitioning to escape these feelings. | |
| 23 | Found online detransition communities and began critical analysis of transition ideology. | |
| 23 | Engaged in non-affirming therapy and introspection, leading to the realization that my issues were societal, not physical. | |
| 24 | Fully desisted. Came to understand my experience was linked to internalized misandry and autism. |
Top Comments by /u/Gonalex:
I find it so sad that the only sub reddit that performs critical thought analysis on the trans idealogy has to censor itself and the way people discuss topics in fear of getting banned... It's very prevalent in here to consider puberty blockers child abuse since there's actual medical evidence for a chance to affect bone and brain development. Other research showed evidence of a good perchentage of kids regretting the decision and their condition worsening over time. You have to dig to find this stuff, actual evidence of kids being put into potential danger.
Calling anyone skeptical or against puberty blockers a terf is easily the most reductive thing you can do to the conversation. I'm not a TERF and I consider it child abuse, there's a shit ton of people who are in the same camp but you're trying to silence us with your labels.
Everytime I have any critical thoughts about the trans movement, regardless if they come from a genuine worry for other people they are met with ignorance and distain. I quote this sub in many conversations and how voices like yours are ignored, your story and suffering matters a lot too but nobody seems to care if you had enough advice and guidance about your "failed" decision to transition. It's honestly depressing and it goes to show how loving modern lefty culture really is, it's all identity politics and trying to a fit a certain mold. What happened to deep gender deconstruction and introspection? God fuck the world has gone mad. Anyway, sorry for the rant. I'm really sorry to hear you have been treated this way, this sub is here for you!
This video is extremely important, I might not like how Jordan partakes in trans discource at times (The Page tweet is a prime example) I do agree with where he is coming from. Glamorizing a transition to millions of minors can lead into a lot of harm, but the way he went on about expressing that was absolutely assenine...
Men face way more systematic oppression that most people like think, the things I mentioned earlier just scratch the surface, boys and young men are in crisis and nobody is caring for them or trying to help them. The fact that the homeless issue is mainly male oriented yet most shelters in western society are for women and deny help to men is incredibly sad, yet somehow you still claim the patriarchy is an actual prevelant thing in our society. Young women are so much more ahead than young men that some psychologists claim that men's culture is left behind a good 30-40 years compared to women's. It's late stage capitalism and cronies that is making us miserable, not "the patriarchy".
Men are suffering right now, a lot of young men feel so abandomed in society right now that they experience gender dysphoria and choose to transition to cope. I've met people who desisted and detransitioned in this category btw, it's very real and we need to talk about it more. I see this being a conversation topic over trans men, but rarely do we get to discuss the same phenomenon for trans women, the conversation has to be sullied with "the patriarchy" still being a thing so even comparing the phenomenon offends some people...
Not sure if I'd classify this purely as misogyny. It's more sexist gender tropes ingrained by some of our most ancient behaviors, which obviously don't describe every individual. Girls are tribal by nature according to a lot of psyche studies, so them isolating themselves can be seen as more "boyish". You can even see this in autistic boys and girls. Little autistic girls 9 times out of 10 fit in with the crowd and "mask" their autism. This is how the term originally originated. Autistic boys almost always isolate themselves. And generally males do that more on average. Autism just brings it out to the extreme which kind of creates this huge contrast of isolation between autistic people of the opposite gender. I feel there's a lot of ground to uncover regarding how girls get mislabeled as tomboys if they don't like typical girly things and isolate themselves in general. Some deep subconscious thought process about girls having to get along with majority of the other ones and if not they aren't truly feminine.
Disclaimer: not wanna take away from your rant or he reductive, just adding my thoughts. Always sorry to hear anyone's harsh experiences in our extremely sexist society...
Power? What do you consider power in this context? Power is to have control of your life and what you want to do with it. Men do worse in education, get sentenced way more which gets them jailed and end up way more often without a roof over their head. In what context do they have more power exactly?
Western women believing that we still somehow hold more power completely devalues the male advocate movement and subconsciously makes your average person care less about our systematic oppression. There's some studies that show evidence that women's voices actually affect public opinion more than men's in our current society. I'm confident that women still believing in the patriarchy can harm male advocacy in the long run.
The fact that I mentioned all these issues and you claim the patriarchy is real and that men hold more power always will baffles the literal shit out of me. Do you not care if your son, nephew, brother, father, male relative of any kind has a way higher chance to fail college, end up in the streets or kill themselves? Because this is honestly what it feels like when I ever mention this stuff in leftist spaces. All this not caring causes men to develop gender dysphoria, I personally fucking hate being a man because of the huge gap in empathy shown in these type of discussions.
Not trying to butt in here or anything but have you tried talking to a detrans male or desisted male about this? I know gender dysphoric men who have experienced internalized misandry and I keep seeing common patterns with internalized misogyny. Sharing some experiences about it might help you heal or understand your situation more. Just a suggestion purely because I started reading Carl Jung and his entire thing about understanding the subconscious of people around you can help decipher yours has deeply resonated with me. It has personally helped me deal with a lot as of late.
I'd highly propose making a separate thread for that if you're really open to it. Understanding both sides of our horrid gender tropes make you feel way less alone in your pain. Man or woman, everyone goes through something they should never of had to go through purely because society had some expectations for them to fulfill. All this based on some magic boxes all of us have to tick for some mad reason. Either way hope you recover mentally and wish you all the best.