Anyone who doesn't fully agree with the current gender theory is a "TERF". I personally don't even believe terfs exist as they're being portraited, it's a political boogeyman myth made up to keep trans people in line.

Just to understand your point of view, do you mean that radfems are all terfs?

It's all "biological sex doesn't exist" until someone wants to claim they are a trans female - then it's totally legit and scientifically accurate. /s Like, which one is it? If there's no such thing as a female, then obviously you can't be one either, sorry buddy.

Please postpone if not outright cancel. This is your subconscious trying to save your body from the trauma of unnecessary amputations and your mind from the years of pain and regret it would only add on top of your other pain. Mental health problems can be solved with time and therapy but they can't grow back missing bodyparts. And when you are finally feeling better, you will thank yourself so much that you listened to the tiny voice in your head that knew this was a bad idea. Random surgeries will never fix mental health problems, it's the same kind of logic that thinks that getting my right big toe removed will cure my depression.

I'm with you there. When I got my mastectomy, I literally had not heard the word "detransition" anywhere. It was before the first detransitioners speaking up. It's easy to say I just didn't google enough, but I can't stress enough that when I started identifying as trans, everything I read about it was super positive. It was also placated as medically necessary. I literally did not even realize one could ever regret getting a medically necessary surgery - why would I, when the whole team taking care of me (nurses, doctors, surgeons, psychiatrist and a therapist) all gave me green light saying yes, this is an appropriate way to treat your feelings? Why would I question it, when everyone in my social circles and news only talked about how much it helped them? If I would go on searching alternate information about for example tooth procedures and then not go to the dentist because of something I read on the internet, everyone would think I was a conspiracy theorist. Hell, even I would think that. There was absolutely no reason for me to ever question that this procedure, done by medical professionals, would not help me. Not to mention the incredible peer pressure/cultish environment in the support groups that made me not want to google or read anything even remotely critical about trans surgeries, in fear of getting triggered into panic or becoming a terf myself. Giving accurate information about surgeries was forbidden in my circles, but I only realized it afterwards. Especially if someone were to admit they didn't actually solve all of their mental health problems.

It was two years later of course when they actually had to put on the hospital's website the disclaimer that these surgeries are experimental, because there's not enough research backing them up. And of course it was only after that they moved into the informed consent model. I think the only thing that would've made me reconsider getting the mastectomy would've been exactly this information - that it's experimental. And after this I started seeing the interviews of some detransitioners in the news and in youtube. Before that I didn't know it would be possible to regret the surgeries, because as I said, why would you? They're said to be lifesaving and medically necessary. Blaming detransitioners for this is admitting the surgeries are elective and cosmetic.

Oh, same! It's so funny how at first identifying as nonbinary felt really freeing, because I was already kinda gnc... but over time it became just another box I tried to fit myself into. I started thinking more and more like "how can I communicate my identity to other people" and so I couldn't really wear or like some of the stuff I actually did like, because I felt it was "too girly". Calculating and choosing more masculine stuff because of this neurosis, not because I actually vibed with it. How ironic! Wasn't I supposed to be more "me"?! I kinda woke up from that when I heard another nonbinary person anguish over one part of the shape of their belt - they couldn't choose what to wear and thus couldn't go out for days, because they thought that one particular part on their belt could, and I quote, "communicate to others that I am a woman and not nonbinary". And that's when I thought... that's insane, this is literally insane, nobody is going to be looking at your belt and if they are, I guarantee they will not be thinking anything of it except "that's a belt". The sex-pattern-recognition we have in our brain is based on seeing other people's physical bodies, not compiling clues of their belt buckles and eyeglasses and clothing choices and then trying to decipher what the other person "meant to communicate". Trying to micromanage other people's thoughts like that is either mental illness, neurosis, or otherwise online induced, and it will isolate you from other people and make you crazy for no real benefit. I'm happy you found a way out.

You say you think you'll never stop feeling dysphoric, but if I may offer some perspective on this, you're only 19 and your dysphoria started at 12. That's 7 years. You're right, it definitely is a long time especially for someone your age, since it's almost half of your entire life.

But it will not be a long time forever, and even things that feel like forever will change as time passes. 7 years is nothing compared to living 80 or 90 or even 100 years. I'm 33, still young, and just starting to grasp that. You will not feel like this forever, and it is possible to manage and even get rid of your dysphoria without transitioning. If you do decide to transition, you will anyway have to deal with the dysphoria and traumas, and on top of that there will be the permanent changes on your body and possible health issues for the next ~70 years of your life. It's not a quick fix because it doesn't really solve any of your problems. That's not to say that some people don't transition and find that it helps them, but it doesn't make you a different person or different sex. In case of your sexual trauma I'd really consider if you're trying to escape your body into a safer body/identity with the transitioning wish. You never really got to feel comfortable with your post-pubescent body because of your trauma, but that usually starts happening after teenagehood is over. Some people here say they wish they'd had the chance to learn to feel comfortable with their unaltered adult bodies. I wish that too but can't anymore because I had a mastectomy. My main point is that mental health can always be improved to the point of not feeling overwhelmed by dysphoria, but if you get to that place after surgeries or hrt, the healing won't repair the damage on your physical body.

Edit: as for your question, human brain matures around 25 years of age, so that seems like a good milestone if you want to wait a bit to be more sure

I really feel like the negative opinions some trans folk have on detrans people are actually just revealing their own fears and insecurities - they're just projecting them on us, we're the perfect scapegoats. It's human nature to do that, everybody does that to a digree. Especially now that trans issues are talked about widely in the news, internet, everywhere, it's easy to have doubts about it actually just being a trend, and maybe I'm a transtrender too, because how come it's everywhere suddenly? But that thought is uncomfortable, so it's better to make that a trait that only bad people have, in this case, detransitioners. Same goes for everything else. If you want to create a divide between "real trans people" and "not real" and put yourself on the good side, who better to cast as the antagonists? Us, of course. That way you don't have to deal with the doubt that maybe you have some of these thoughts too. Now you can tolerate them because you think it's not you who has them, it's those damn detransitioners who must be this weirdly specific thing you've been insecure about. It really does tell a lot about these people who are being vocal about hating us. I don't take it personally for this reason, although it is sad.

Yeah, I know what you mean. I had just finished telling my friend this very nuanced story about my detransitioning, and all she responded with was "so you're basically cis now". No I'm not, I don't believe in the whole thing anymore, cis and trans mean nothing to me anymore except that they're a thing that some people believe in. It's a belief system that means nothing to the people who don't live inside that specific bubble. I'm not religious either, but that doesn't mean I identify as a heathen, lol. It was very hard to explain that no, I still don't have a gender identity (which was the very same reason I once thought I was trans - I thought everybody else "felt" like some gender and I didn't), but I'm not trans anymore. She just didn't get it. Detransitioning didn't magically give me a woman's gender identity, I actually don't believe anyone has that in a sense that would be useful as a classifier.

I still feel exactly the same, but now I have just grown disillusioned with the whole queer theory thing and most importantly, I sorted out my personal issues in therapy. Now I'm able to live my life free from dysphoria, I don't even have to think about gender when I'm not dealing with the mastectomy reconstruction. Trans people calling that "becoming cis" is a very deliberate attempt at creating a new narrative that supports their narrow world view, and also one that doesn't make them feel uncomfortable. It would be too much to admit that there actually aren't two separate groups - true trans and fake/confused/cis after all - but that everyone has the same insecurities and everyone can potentially have thoughts of detransitioning. Only time will tell who will truly benefit from transitioning and who will later realize the root of their problems was somewhere else, even if they're 100% sure now. I was too, for many years.

No, I don't. There's no such thing as an identity separate from a body its inhabiting and that magically came from somewhere and went into a wrong baby. It's not a thing. People are free to believe in it, but there's no evidence that supports this. Same goes with the "male brain but female body" explanation - same shit, just trying to sound more scientific.

But I know there might be people for whom physically transitioning might help them live their lives, and they never feel they need to detransition. When someone like that has died without ever detransitioning, then of course I'm willing to say that hey, transitioning seemed to be the right decision for them. It's all about if the treatment continues to help the patient. But nobody has any magical essence that somehow makes them different sex than their bodies.

Don't know if I count, but I'm in my early thirties. Started identifying as trans around 23, had mastectomy around 27 and regret started about two years after that. It's true that young people are more impressionable as their identities are still developing, but I strongly feel that even though I was already in my twenties, I hadn't gone through some of the developmental stages you're supposed to go through in your teens. While living at home I wasn't allowed to express anger or any other feelings different from my parents, so I was only able to start separating from them as an adult after moving out. And then I did what every teenager does, abandoned my old family-self in favor of a new group identity while searching for my own. Nonbinary was the perfect new identity because of all the new friends and (cult-like) group elements it came with. And they do lovebomb you until you feel like you can't ever leave them. It was a phase I psychologically needed to go through. But it is a shame that that phase had to be one where it's popular to amputate your body parts, because yeah, I eventually grew out of it. Can't grow new breasts tho.