I've changed how I explain my case on the phone with women's clinics and that's helped a lot. I don't say I'm detrans initially. I preface it with: "I'm looking for an OBGYN that specializes in women who had hysterectomies and/or have been put into early medically induced menopause". I describe what's medically happening to me, and only when it's necessary to bring it up do I explain the trans and detrans part. I've also started explicitly stating that I've been redirected to transgender docs and treated like a transwoman, when biologically this makes no sense no matter how you twist it.

I've noticed people are often bothered to the same degree as they were involved in LGBT and/or trans specific subculture. The people most negatively affected were into cult-level shit. That requires a recovery process and for a time you might feel disgust, negativity or resistance to things that remind you of that miserable period. A lot of people don't realize how much they're suffering more over time until it starts to become conscious, and then they get disillusioned from a fantasy they believed in. They see a colder, bleached, depressing reality.

I didn't participate in these kinds of groups much so I'm not as bothered, I got lucky. I always was annoyed at the more outlandish aspects of "Queer culture" that create endless labels and obsess over the micro-facets of sexuality, much of it being totally made up. As it moved away from older principles like acceptance of one's sexual orientation or transgenderism being a condition one is innately born with, it got into this increasingly mushy and nonsensical territory around nonbinary identities and endless variations on orientation, even including polyamory into the mix as if that was a kind of orientation. So a person could be straight and cis but if they're polyamorous they're LGBT suddenly. That shit is just fluffy nothing, it's made up nonsense.

All that aside, I occasionally do perceive transgenderism in a darker and more depressing light now. I remember how I suffered and struggled, and look at trans people as still being trapped in that suffering.

Dr. K on HealthyGamer went through this. Tldr is that autistic people have a harder time recognizing their internal self in other people, so there's a lot more ambiguity. They pick up social cues by mimicking and copying, rather than having an intuitive understanding of what the cues mean emotionally. It's a "fake it til you make it" mentality. This can affect a person's perception of gender, and if they think they have more in common with the opposite gender, they might develop a gender identity that matches.

I've also noticed that autistic people tend to have more masculine traits, which would make sense of autistic FTMs. I had an autistic transman friend that I'd known since junior high and way back in the day I didn't even know he was supposed to be a "girl". He passed before he even transitioned and seemed 100% like a boy. He is one of those people I can't imagine being anything other than a man. It'd be very hard to see him as a woman, his voice was very deep even at 13 and he never looked like a woman. People with androgynous characteristics are probably more likely to be nonbinary or transgender because of how they perceive their personality and secondary sex characteristics.

You do look different but you looked like a woman in both. You just looked older in the first one. Very pretty in the second photo :) I hope life is treating you well now that you're further into detransition. I'm 10 months in after 14 years as a transman.

I was one of the kids that was denied repeatedly and it was hell. It's like years of gaslighting when people deny anything is wrong with you. You're already responding in a remarkably different way and allowing self expression is critical to healthy development.

As much as I was desperate for some kind of treatment in childhood and as much as puberty was severely traumatizing and extremely painful, I'm not sure if blockers and early HRT is the answer. I was left alone to take care of myself. Nobody offered to investigate and look for another diagnosis and treatment. If someone had actually tried to find out what was causing my pain and suffering and tried to help, and if I wasn't bullied ruthlessly by my mother over my masculine boyish self expression, it's likely I could have healed sooner. And maybe wouldn't have been transgender so long (14 years).

Your child needs to know that there is no complete cure for transgenderism that will make her fully a woman when she grows up. I've also heard Amy terrible results with blockers, early HRT and especially surgeries. She needs to know that full SRS surgery is invasive, painful and almost guaranteed to come with lifelong damage. Its way more than normal surgery, you're playing with biology in a way that the body can't sustain on its own.

Your daughter will need to go through a mental process to understand her body will always be different from other girls. She also needs to know that there might be no way around male puberty that's safe. I'm not sure if there's a way to start HRT before at least age 16. And SRS surgeries are like giving oneself a lifelong disability. Her therapist needs to help her process the truth so she can cope with it when the time comes.

I was horrified and traumatized when I went through sex ed. I couldn't cope with it and was convinced puberty would heal my body and make me a regular boy. If I had been helped with my health problems instead of neglected and left alone to suffer, I would be much better off. I was one of the kids that was consistently transgender. I lived as a man for 14 years. And still I was changed in a very deep way. And there was healing that was not possible if I remained a trans man.

I'm quite new to all this stuff going on, I was never involved in the LGBT world much and was treated like trash by SJWs/ hard leftists for being the evil white man (when I was still trans).

Now recently seeking lesbian dates as a detrans woman I've definitely noticed the lesbian dating world overrun with MTFs, and men who clearly don't give a shit. Those men don't try to look anything like women. I don't get why they would try dating lesbians, it just seems like desperation. And I did date an MTF woman years ago when I was also still trans. I was in love with her and cared about her deeply. This person also detransitioned as I've heard recently.

I think before the late 2010s it was all way different. I remember 15 years ago when TERF was a self- described label by the meanest and most sexist radical feminists. The OG Social Justice Warriors. Times have changed a LOT.

I've never been up for dating a nonbinary person usually. I'm attracted to feminine women, not androgynous people. I'd say something like this: "I want to support you as a nonbinary person being who you are, but I can't be in a romantic relationship with someone who doesn't look like a woman and alters their female attributes".

In the last 10 years, a whole new culture around transgenderism has developed that's markedly different from its history, which changes the social experiences of transgender people substantially. I was part of the old wave of trans, where I was isolated and on the fringe, the only person of my kind among everyone I knew, where I faced intense resistance to my condition and it was denied flat out for many years of my childhood. I grew up gaslit and ignored, adults not believing me at all.

But this new culture around it has a bunch of new slang established and has made transgenderism a very *social* experience. That's a really important point because I think the social aspect is a major reason it's become a trend. People are expressing themselves through trans, queer or nonbinary as an identity, as a fashion, as a culture. This subculture developed on top of broader LGBT culture. Lots of people want to participate but I think for reasons that have nothing to do with legitimately having the condition.

It's to the point that people end up in collectively queer environments, which means their associated traits with men and women start to become flipped; transmen and transwomen end up taking over as a dominant gender binary ironically. When you're surrounded by queer people, your general idea of "man" and "woman" changes to match that picture.

Not only is there sexual orientation, but there's also people who wouldn't be interested in any transgender person because it's not attractive. This is just denial from transgender people who are suffering. They're trying to live in a fantasy that they can fit in with the rest of the population and date normally. I never once called people "transphobic" when I was transgender, though I did criticize anti-trans ideas if people were extreme or if I thought they were wrong about what transgender people experience. I never once believed in some utopian fantasy where I'd fit in normally. I knew that I'd always have to tell my dates or potential girlfriends that I was transgender and they would either be okay with it or not. It was a severe handicap and a horrible disorder. There's no way around that.

I wasn't even accepted by queer zealots like this when I was trans. I wasn't a leftist, passed well as a man and thus became the evil straight white man.

I'm not at all surprised at their continued bigotry here. In sick of bigots hijacking human rights movements and using it to bully people into submission.