This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's comments are highly specific, emotionally nuanced, and show a consistent, personal perspective over time. They offer empathetic advice, share personal mental health struggles, and express a coherent, critical viewpoint on gender ideology that is common among genuine desisters and gender-critical individuals. The passion and anger present are consistent with someone who feels they or others have been harmed.
About me
I struggled with deep depression and trauma from a young age, which led me to believe my pain was because I wasn't meant to be a woman. I found real healing by understanding my complex PTSD, not by changing my body. I now see that my discomfort was with stereotypes and expectations, not my female self. I am grateful I found a path that didn't involve medical procedures, and I'm finally learning to be at peace as the woman I am.
My detransition story
My journey with gender was a difficult and confusing time in my life, but I came out the other side with a much clearer understanding of myself. I never actually transitioned medically, but looking back, I see how easily I could have gotten caught up in it if I were a bit younger. My story is more about the feelings that lead someone down that path and how I found my way out of that mindset.
For most of my life, I struggled with major depression, anxiety, and what I now understand to be complex PTSD. I felt suicidal from a young age and was overwhelmed by intense shame and self-loathing. I tried many forms of self-harm. By my early twenties, I had completely broken down. I was non-functional, crying for at least an hour every single day for months. I was hopeless and felt like I would never be able to love myself or be happy.
I believe a lot of my struggle came from a deep discomfort with the expectations placed on me as a woman. I went through a phase where I bought into the idea that I must be "not like other girls." I now see that this was because most of the media I consumed portrayed women from a male perspective, which was hard to relate to. I think I was searching for a way to escape myself and my pain, and for a while, identifying out of womanhood seemed like a possible escape hatch.
I also had a complicated relationship with my sexuality. I identify as bisexual but am in a heterosexual relationship and look fairly gender-conforming. This made it hard to find a community. I don’t relate to the modern definition of bisexuality that seems to focus on attraction to all gender presentations and androgyny; I'm attracted to very specific presentations within the male/female binary. I felt like I didn't fit in anywhere and that my own community might reject me for believing in biological sex.
Therapy never really helped me. What finally did was a book on complex PTSD that gave me the tools to understand my trauma and start healing from it. It was the first thing that gave me real hope.
When I look at the transgender movement now, I see it through the lens of my own past struggles. I see young people, especially girls who are uncomfortable with puberty or who are gender non-conforming, being offered transition as a solution. It worries me deeply because I know that for many, like me, the problem isn't their body but deep-seated issues like trauma, depression, or internalized homophobia. I see butch lesbians being encouraged to become trans men, which feels like a new form of conversion therapy that erases homosexual people.
I also became very suspicious of the financial incentives. Hormone replacement therapy and surgeries are incredibly profitable for pharmaceutical companies and surgeons. Creating lifelong patients is a business model, and there’s a lot of money to be made in selling a new identity.
I don’t regret not transitioning because I never did it. But I do have regrets about the time I spent hating myself and feeling like I was the problem. My regret is that I didn't find the right tools to heal sooner. I am grateful that I found a path that didn’t involve permanently altering my body. I now understand that my womanhood isn't defined by stereotypes or skills—like whether or not I can cook—but is just a fact of my being. I can be a woman who is hurt, who is healing, and who is finally learning to be myself.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on my experiences:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Childhood | Struggled with depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation began. |
| Early 20s | Reached a state of being "non-functional" due to mental health crisis. |
| Mid-Late 20s | Read the book "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving," which began my real healing process. |
| Late 20s | Gained clarity on my identity as a woman and understood my past discomfort as related to trauma, not gender. |
Top Comments by /u/IKnowWhatImAbout:
Why would they be anti homosexual? Most are gay, I though??
My understanding:
Currently, most males who identify as trans are attracted to females and therefore identify as lesbians. Most females who identify as lesbians are exclusively attracted to females. Lesbians who only desire partners with female genitalia are being labeled transphobic, bigoted, and "genital fetishists" due to the belief that rejecting a person as a sexual partner on the basis they have a penis (note: SRS is still relatively uncommon) means rejecting their gender identity and failing to see and treat them as a woman. This has been happening to lesbians for a while now, and you can look up the "cotton ceiling" to learn more about it, but it is also starting to happen to gay men. Even bisexuals are having their sexuality rewritten to mean "attracted to one's own gender and other genders".
Basically, if gender is innate and sex is changeable, and one's status as a man or a woman is determined by their gender identity and presentation then rejecting someone based on their anatomy is a preference rather than an orientation and therefore discriminatory.
There is also the issue that many homosexuals are gender non conforming as children, and an argument can be made that transitioning children is a form of conversion therapy. I've seen many lesbians lament that butch lesbians are being erased with many identifying as transmen and those who do not are sometimes labeled as "transphobic" for refusing to embrace their trans identity despite the fact they are happy as women.
Edit to add:
Magdalen Berns channel on YouTube has some excellent videos from a lesbian perspective.
This medium article is rather extensive and talks about the risks of transitioning, the profit being made off it, and the association with homosexuality.
Also rephrased a sentence.
27 is still so young; humans don't finish growing up until age 25 and the vast majority of people leave their mark on the world when they are older than that. You still have time. When I was younger than you, I felt similarly and there was an infograph that helped me; unfortunately I can't find it right now but these are similar:
https://www.nerdgraph.com/wp-content/uploads/Accomplishments-late-in-life-infographic-620x5782.jpg
https://www.eretirements.com/blog/remarkable-late-in-life-achievements-2/
https://blog.adioma.com/timeline-infographic-of-founder-age/
I know how much it sucks to want to be physically active and unable. I'm sure there are other things you can do in the meantime to contribute towards your health. Focus on acquiring knowledge that you'll be able to use when your injury is healed. Read or listen to books about diet, health and exercise. Try to stretch and do what ever you are capable of to maintain the mobility you currently have. With the internet, there are plenty of jobs you can do from home if you want to - coding, tutoring, transcribing, etc. But for now, be patient with yourself and focus on getting well; you've already been through so much. You can get through this, I believe in you.
The only thing I am having trouble understanding is why this particular disorder is being normalized.
There are a wide variety of reasons for that, but I'm going to tell you the simplest one: follow the money. Hormone replacement therapy used to take place as the routine administration of estrogen to menopausal women and was an extremely lucrative industry until the late 90s when we found out how dangerous the side effects were and prescriptions vanished over night. Pharmaceutical companies, as they tend to do, found a new market. Testosterone is also very profitable and being pushed on men and women alike. Aside from the direct profit of selling HRT and puberty blockers, the side effects of prolonged usage create life long patients and even more profit. Experimental cosmetic procedures are also extremely profitable for the surgeons who perform them. There is tons of money to be made through selling someone a new identity and for transgenderism this also includes wardrobes, make up, voice training, etc. There are also some very wealthy people funding this and at the moment the majority of LGBT funding is earmarked for the T. Check out this article if you're interested and want to learn more.
So the more "normal" this is, the more people who can identify with it, the larger the market, the more money there is to be made.
Of course there are many other reasons this has taken off, but "greedy capitalists don't care who they hurt" feels like a good starting point.
Best of luck! If you approach it as trying to understand and asking lots of questions that might help. Why does she feel like a man? Are there ways women can't be or things they can't do? Are certain things only acceptable for men?
Seeking out and sharing with her female produced media may also help. Lots of young women fall into the trap of feeling they are "not like other girls" because most media only portrays women from a male perspective which we understandably find difficult to relate to. If you can find female role models who embody the qualities she identifies with, it may show her that women can be just like her and she can be herself and be a woman.
If she just thinks life would be easier as a man, then educating her on the financial cost and health risks might persuade her otherwise. The science just doesn't exist to achieve changing sex in the way she's been led to believe.
Keep asking questions and educating yourself; this is an important time in your child's life and you're on the right track.
Thank you for sharing your story. I was never trans, but looking back I worry that if I had been growing up during the height of all of this I could've easily gotten caught up in it. Still, I can relate to a lot of the emotional struggles you've experienced:
I have major depression and anxiety and PTSD. I’ve been suicidal for many years without much break. Chronic suicidal ideation fucks you up. You become hopeless, desperate, frustrated, resentful, tired, irrational, and jaded.
I felt like I would never love myself.
I’m a mess in every way btw. I’m not functioning.
It all sounds pretty pathetic, and I’m struggling to forgive myself for it.
I was depressed, anxious, and suicidal since childhood. I had overwhelming feelings of shame and self-loathing and struggled with many kinds of self harm. In my early 20s I reached a point that I describe as "non-functional;" where I was crying hard for a minimum of 1 hour a day every day for months and could not find the strength or hope needed to overcome my fear of failing so catastrophically yet again.
You don't mention therapy in your post, and although it can be wonderful with the right person, it didn't help me. What did help was a book called Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving. Please consider reading it. I never would have imagined anything could help me as much as this book did, and everyone I've given a copy to has recommended it to others. If you (or anyone else reading) have any questions about the book, my experiences, or just need someone to talk to, I would be happy to hear from you in a private message. I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but there is hope.
Ugh, that sounds miserable. I'm bisexual, but in a heterosexual relationship and fairly gender conforming in appearance so most of my struggle has been in not relating to other people's sexualities and not fully understanding my own. Now that I'm finally at a place in life where I'd be interested in seeking out other women like me for community, it feels like I would be rejected due to my belief in biological sex.
This post shared on /r/truebisexuals, for instance describes bisexuals in a way that I cannot relate to: I am happy to explain my sexuality, attracted to very few styles of presentation and not at all to androgyny. By this definition, a reserved heterosexual who is attracted to all variations of the opposite sex is more "bisexual" than me! So ridiculous.
My heart goes out to you. I know how much it hurts to be unable to protect our children from the world.
I haven't explored this website but I just remembered it exists and might provide some help for you: https://www.transgendertrend.com/ It was created by a female educator to support parents and teachers who questioned the trans narrative as it applies to children.
I'm a woman who can cook and in my experience the majority of people these days can't cook, and even those who can have very limited skills. It's not a gender thing it's a cultural thing. In developed countries we seem to have very limited skill sets because we spend so much time working that if you factor in time, energy, and start up expenses for the average person it is much easier and cheaper to pay a professional. It's all very practical but definitely limits our opportunities to explore new activities and take satisfaction in new skills. Things have changed pretty quickly and as a society our expectations haven't caught up yet.
You can learn to cook as an adult, there are endless resources online. But if you don't have the time, energy, interest, resources, or it just isn't something that makes you happy there is no reason you need to learn. You are a woman and no skill or societal expectation can make you more or less of one.
I'm sorry your mom set you back. It sucks when people who are supposed to love us do things that hurt us.
It might take some time finding recipes you like but there are lots of things out there you can make without an oven or knife. Have you heard of no-bake cookies? There are a bunch of other "no-bake" dessert recipes online too. Even though I prefer chopping by hand, it takes so much time that it's actually easier to buy pre cut frozen veggies or canned fruit. My food processor was $25, is my favorite appliance and does all the work for small chopping. If you expand your definition of "cooking" there are a bunch of meals you can make: burritos, parfaits, fondue (which only requires a tea candle and pots are easy to find at thrift stores), pre cut salad mixes can be fancied up with nuts, fruit or home made dressing. Try finding simple recipes to build your confidence and hold off on the scarier stuff until you find a recipe that really excites you. I believe in you :) and remember there is no shame in taking short cuts - even the professionals recommend it for lots of seemingly simple foods.
Oh, and if it's only flames but not heat, you could look into getting a hot plate, or a countertop grill like the GTXpress101 (which I only mention by name cause I have one and it's simple to use) and one of those would open up a lot of options for you.