This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic. There are no serious red flags indicating it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's comments are nuanced, detailed, and show a clear, consistent personal narrative of being a 26-year-old AMAB individual carefully researching transition and detransition. They demonstrate empathy, personal reflection, and a deep engagement with the complexities of the topic, including medical details, psychological motivations, and even theological arguments. This depth and internal consistency are not typical of inauthentic accounts. Their passion and concern align with a genuine person navigating this difficult space.
About me
I was born male and first felt something was different when I was in preschool, but I didn't seriously consider transition until I was 26. I decided to take things very slowly because I was worried about people rushing into permanent changes they might regret. I researched the negative long-term outcomes and serious medical side effects that often aren't discussed, which made me extremely cautious. I realized my main goal was to understand my own mind, not to change my body. I never started hormones or had surgery, and I'm grateful my caution saved me from a decision I might have later regretted.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been one of questioning and trying to find the right path for myself. I was born male and first started having feelings that something was different when I was in preschool, but I didn't really admit it to myself or start seriously considering transition until I was 26. For me, it was never a rush. I saw a lot of people online who seemed to be rushing into hormones and surgery, and that worried me. A friend of mine who detransitioned told me he believes we're going to see a huge wave of people who regret their transition because they moved too fast without thinking it all the way through.
Because of that, I decided to take my time. I wanted to exhaust all my options and understand every possible risk before making any permanent changes. I was shocked by how easy it was to get hormones; I realized I could probably be on estrogen within a month if I asked for it. But I held off. I decided to wait until I had healthcare again to even have a consultation. I figured, what’s an extra six months of waiting after struggling with these feelings for over twenty years? Rushing into big decisions has never worked out well for me.
A lot of my research was spent looking for the negative stories, the "unsuccessful" transitions, because that information felt hard to find. It seemed like most posts I saw were from people less than two years into their transition who were really happy and excited. But I wanted to know about the people five or ten years in. Were they still happy? I started to find posts talking about how the initial "gender euphoria" can fade, and that people were chasing a high that eventually runs out. That really stuck with me.
I also looked deeply into the medical side effects. I learned that drugs like Spiro, which is an anti-androgen, are also blood thinners and diuretics that can put stress on your kidneys. But on the websites of informed consent clinics, they often only mention the anti-androgen effects. This felt dishonest to me and made me even more cautious.
My motivation for considering transition was important to me. My detransitioned friend said he saw a lot of people transition because they felt they didn't fit in with their own sex, only to end up feeling even more isolated afterwards. I didn't want that to be me. I worried that maybe my gender dysphoria was actually an unaddressed mental health issue that was causing other problems, and that transitioning wouldn't fix the root cause.
I also struggled with my faith as a Christian. I spent a lot of time researching what the Bible says about transition. I found arguments against it, like the idea that God made us male and female and we shouldn't change that. But I also found interpretations that were more accepting, like verses about eunuchs being welcome in God's kingdom. I ultimately came to believe that your motivation matters most, and that believers who transition aren't going to hell for it.
In the end, I never did start hormones or have any surgeries. I only ever transitioned socially in a few small, private online communities. I'm grateful I took the slow path. I don't have any regrets about not transitioning medically because I never did it. I think my caution saved me from making a permanent decision I might have later regretted. For me, it was more about understanding myself than changing my body. I needed to figure out my own mind first.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 3-4 | First remember having feelings that something was different (preschool age). |
| 26 | Began to seriously admit my feelings and consider transition. Started extensive research. |
| 26 | Decided to postpone any medical consultation for at least six months to avoid rushing. |
Top Comments by /u/Jazehiah:
I also don't want to go through the medical upsides or downsides of transitioning. I don't want my hair to thin, I don't want to deal with vaginal atrophy, I don't want top surgery, I don't want a hysterectomy. None of that feels worth it to me.
If you don't like the changes, stop. If you don't want the changes, stop. You are not obligated to take T. You do need to talk to your endocrinologist and say "hey, I feel worse."
You also need to talk to a therapist and say "hey, I'm having second thoughts about this. I think I jumped the gun."
I've tried talking to my therapist, but she doesn't want to touch on the topic any time soon.
Change therapists. This is causing you distress now, and needs to be given priority. They work for you. What on earth could be more important to discuss right now?
I feel guilty for wanting to detransition. I wanted to transition so badly, and I can't even remember why.
Yeah, that's a problem. That should never be the case. Do you have a journal you can revisit?
I've put so much time (to me. 2 years medical and 2 additional years social probably doesn't seem like a lot) and money into it. I literally just dropped $54 on the T cream and $99 on Plume.
Sunk cost fallacy.
Better to lose a couple hundred dollars now and sort things out. If you don't figure it out you're risking even more.
I feel nervous about how people I know might react to me detransitioning.
I imagine you felt the same way about people finsing out that you would be transitioning.
Remember: transitioning (and detransitioning) is for you, not them. You are transitioning for the purpose of making yourself feel better. If it is not making you feel better, you should not be doing it.
All that said, it your feelings are not uncommon. It is normal to second guess the decision to transition. It's not an easy or rapid process. There is a reason why people are supposed to have therapy before during and after this process.
Also, this endocrinologist should have warned you about the birth control, especially if they knew you were taking it. Insufficient warnings and downplaying of side effects are complaints I see here frequently.
Are your therapists and doctors using an affirmation based model? I understand they can push people to transition who wouldn't (or shouldn't) normally do so. Roughly how old are you? Starting too early and regretting it is also pretty common.
This may not be a particularly popular response, given the subreddit we are on, but here are some things to consider:
The people who rush into transitioning are the ones most likely to regret it, and detransition. Check the pinned survey results, and see if the responses there sound like what you're going through.
In your case, your age works in your favor. Best results for HRT happen when a person begins before their mid 20s. That gives you a decade to figure things out and still be in a good age range. Even then, people start transitioning at all stages of life. So, relax. You have plenty of time.
Speaking of age, consider that you are at the age when people feel the most insecure about their body image.
If you are that worried about figuring out your gender before pubery, talk to your parents and your doctors about hormone blockers and delaying puberty. They are not perfect, and they come with risks, but they may be an option.
There are women who love sports. There are men who loves dresses. You might find that "Nonbinary" suits you better than male or female.
It is not uncommon for AMABs to be extra masculine (and even enjoy it) before transitioning because they feel that's what's expected of them. Similarly, AFABs may be ultra-girly.
I don't want to push you to any particular conclusion, because that will only lead to more problems, but I do want you to have some food for thought. If you have not already read it, genderdysphoria.fyi is a pretty good resource. Write down which (if any) things sound like stuff you've experienced.
Remember: You are 14. You have plenty of time to figure things out. If you need help with that, see if your parents (or school) can get you to a counselor.
Hey, fellow Christian here currently questioing whether or not to transition.
The two biblical arguments I see the most against transition are:
- God intended for there to be only males and females. God intended for your body to come out the way it did. Don't change it.
- Gender dysphoria is caused by the sin of the fall, and is proof of our sinful nature. We should deny it the way we should deny all sin.
There are also a lot of verses saying to honor the body by avoiding sexual immorality.
Here's a post I made to gather my thoughts on the subject.
The short version is that you do not need to detransition in order to stay (or be) saved. The word "eunuch" refers to a lot more than just castrated males in the bible. Acts 8 and the accompanying Isaiah 56:4-8 are pretty clear that "eunuchs" are welcome.
There are also verses that can be interpreted as supporting transition in general. It ultimately depends on the motivation, but believers who transition won't be going to hell, as far as I can tell.
My detrans friend said he saw a lot of people choose to transition because they felt like they didn't fit in with members of their sex. They transitioned, only to find themselves even more isolated than before.
The motivation for transitioning matters a lot.
It's hard to find a complete list of side effects for some of the drugs.
Spiro is a blood thinner with an anti-androgen side effect. That means you bruise more easily, and your blood won't clot as well if you get hurt. It is also a diuretic, which puts stress on your kidneys. (I think. Might be the liver)
On their sites, Plume and Folx only mention the anti-androgen effects.
I see post after post of people less than two years into transition. They all seem quite happy and excited. But, where are the people who are 5-10 years in? How many stay happy?
I'm finally beginning to find posts talking about how "gender euphoria" becomes increasingly difficult to come by as transition progresses. It's like everyone's chasing a euphoria high. When the drug runs out, they find themselves wondering how it all went wrong.
That is why I read these threads: I need to know the risks. I need to know what's causing people to transition and to desist.
It's okay to be upset. If I were in your position, I would be too.
I am also 26, and have been seriously considering HRT. It's because I have heard stories like your own that I started searching for alternatives instead of rushing to grab hormones.
Transitioning was never a magical cure. Never has been. Never will be. It can help, but it requires a certain amount of groundwork to do so. Gender affirming healthcare and orgs like Plume tend to skip over that. It sounds like that may have happened to you.
Thank you for the detailed reply.
I myself (AMAB) have not transitioned, but have been seriously considering it. It has been very hard finding information on "unsuccessful" transitions online. I can't tell if that's because it's rare, or because the information is being suppressed.
I was recently introduced to a friend who detransitioned (MtFtM), and we have been talking about both processes. He firmly believes we are about to see a massive wave of people detransitioning because they rushed in and regretted the decision.
So, I'm taking my time and asking questions. I want to make sure I exhaust my options before starting hormones.
Not all will apply to you, so don't be offended if you see something that you don't relate to at all.
Most don't, actually. A couple do, but most of my reasons are not listed here.
In short, I worry that gender dysphoria is the unaddressed "mental health issue" that's causing some of the others.
Sorry if this is a lot to read.
Don't be. I read a lot. Detail is good.
I'm a Dark Eldar player and I want to help out a fellow elf whenever I can
Someone did their homework. We knife-ears have a common enemy.
Now that I think about it, most of my actual posts are to private communities.
I'm 26. I've had symptoms since I was in preschool, but didn't admit it until a few months ago.
It's scary how easy it is to get hormones. I could be on E before the end of the month, if I asked for it.
I won't go in for a medical consultation until the start of next year when I have health care again. What's an extra six months after 20 years?
Rushing decisions has never worked out for me, anyway. I'm learning what I can, and talking to a couple therapists first.