I think that almost everybody knows The Emperor's New Clothes by Andersen. We read it to the children, but we don't explain them that the story has not a happy ending and how humiliating it was for the king.

All the "transitioning" can be only making a fool of others or making a fool of himslef or both. And all the "supporting" and confirming people are actually stupidly cruel if the final effect.

I had never thought that people would turn me down for my past. I thought they would just look at the person I am today. Sadly for many men and women my biological past matters.

But it is not past. With exception of the "couple of coworkers" everybody lied you. The person you are today is not a woman. Who says this is not "transphobic", he/she only refuses to deceive you. To be a woman is not to "pass" and you know it too.

I wonder how much easier life would be if I just gave in to societal pressure and detransitioned. Another option I'm considering is moving away and not telling my new environment or love interests about my past and hoping that they won't find out.

All the surgery you uńderwent is irreversible, how could you detransition? You can try to deceive other people, but you want a "loving partner". You have to find somebody who would accept you as you are despite it is not easy, or you have to learn to live alone and not to be embittered as an incel. You have not to delude yourself thinking that you can pass through a doorway only painted on a wall.

bottom atrophy, gynomastia ... tired and moody as hell,

Your problem is lack of testosterone, a part of the mediacation provided by your ""responsive" irresponsible doctor.

What if you decide to fight your dysphoria not by confirming it but by challenging it and return to your natural hormones? Hormones are not multivitamine supplements. Hormones are messengers. The testosterone produced by the testicles are actually a message sent into your whole body by the testicles saying we are here and we work and all other organs and systems respond to it. Your testicles are "muted" and all your body receives "fake news" that there are ovaria working and your body is in information chaos. Dysphoria is suffering, but suffering in various forms is always a very significant part of our life.

I think that moderation should follow the main purpose of this subreddit .

Sometimes such terms are used by detrans people themselves expressing their deep frustration. In such cases it should be tolerated according to the rule 1

We will each see words we like and dislike here. Terminology and characterizations applied to self and theory are permitted.

Otherwise not according to the same rule

Language applied to other users must be considerate (no personal attacks). Please choose words with care and kindness, and express action using "I" more than "you".

I am affraid that some redditors don't understand considerate. Maybe other people should report it.

This is interesting and important observation of their mental state. At least some of them really build up a complex construction that excludes any hint that their problem is a mental disorder. The idea of a "magic pill" actually contains assumption that the cause of their state is a disorder of some brain functions and not an inborn "gender identity". The idea of an inborn "gender identity" is their most important virtual instrument that helps them to avoid admitting the real state of their mind. It is a "corner stone" of their self-explanation, it is naturally a very fragile construction, which causes that they are so easily iritable by any opposition or questioning their delusions or "logical implications" of them.

You have to invest in your glasses, especially if you need them also walking in streets. Have someone help you choose it.

Try a very short haircut, showing your earlobes.

Exercise facial muscles. (at least Bubble Chewing Gum)

Find optimal length of your facial hair, this looks like neglected. You should not look like somebody who is lazy to shave regularly.

Facial skin care. Get tanned, not too much.

Exercise appropriately whole body every day, start today, now, at the latest immediately.

Wear men's shirts with ties and men's jackets or vests. Find your manly styl.

Next time take a "prestige" pictures (shirt & tie & jackets & vests), whole body, standing, sitting. Put on your glasses properly, some pictures without it. Also propper light to avoid shades. Darker background, we don't need to see what pictures you have on the wall and your chair.

.

I do blame the surgeons and other physicians very much! This is simply cynical behavior, they do it for money. They are actually the most important players in this terrible game. The "bloody activists" can't force any surgeon to perform such surgeries. They have knowledge enough, they know what they are doing: They promis people that they could escape through a doorway that is only painted on the wall. People suffering from a serious trouble believe them, because it is natural to believe illusions and wishes if they are desperate. (I am neither trans not detrans). Nobody responsible and mentally healathy can be excsused for helping other people destructing themselves.

It looks like her state is actually defense, like it is caused by a traumatic experience related to the place where you live. I guess that it is the "sexual relationship with a coworker, a man 30 years her senior". It can be an extremelly terrible experience even for a girl who is otherwise perfectly healthy. I think you need focus as mch as possible to this problem. She definitely needs somebody close to share the traumatizing story somehow, but if she is autistic, it is more difficult. Of course you should not yield to the suicidal emotional blackmailing, but be very cautious, because she could try a demostrative suicide, what could be very dangerous. People trying demonstrative suicide calculates that the person, they want to attack, will come and save them. I met two cases when the to be blackmailed rescuer missed the right moment by 10 minutes...

Love and understanding is always relationship between concrete human beings who can meet, communicate directly, share their burdens, sorrows, fears, joys or even happiness. Even the religious idea of being loved by a God is something very different. And here on reddit there are only written words. Various emotions arise in me when I read stories and sorrows of the people here but I don't dare say that I love them or that I understand them. It would have been only fantasizing.

Franz Kafka in Letters to Milena wrote:

The easy possibility of writing letters-from a purely theoretical point of view-must have brought wrack and ruin to the souls of the world. Writing letters is actually an intercourse with ghosts and by no means just with the ghost of the addressee but also with one's own ghost, which secretly evolves inside the letter one is writing or even in a whole series of letters, where one letter corroborates another and can refer to it as witness. How did people ever get the idea they could communicate with one another by letter! One can think about someone far away and one can hold on to someone nearby; everything else is beyond human power. Writing letters, on the other hand, means exposing oneself to the ghosts, who are greedily waiting precisely for that. Written kisses never arrive at their destination; the ghosts drink them up along the way. It is this ample nourishment which enables them to multiply so enormously. People sense this and struggle against it; in order to eliminate as much of the ghosts' power as possible and to attain a natural intercourse, a tranquility of soul, they have invented trains, cars, aeroplanes-but nothing helps anymore: These are evidently inventions devised at the moment of crashing. The opposing side is so much calmer and stronger; after the postal system, the ghosts invented the telegraph, the telephone, the wireless. They will not starve, but we will perish.

I'm surprised you haven't written about this yet, not in order to prevent or achieve something with its publication, it's too late for that, but at least to let "them" know they have been exposed.

Incidentally, "they" are also exposed by the exceptions, for it sometimes happens they let a letter through untouched, and it arrives like the light, kind handclasp of a friendly hand. But probably that also merely appears to be so; such cases may be the most dangerous of all, and should be guarded against more carefully than the others. On the other hand, if this is a deception, at least it is a complete one.

This is about writing personal letters. Writting and reading anonymous posts and comment written by people we don't know is much more strange and dangerous.

After checking your history, I think, that you was probably banned for your post titled Does anyone else feel lied to by trans community? It never gets better which was removed.

If the text of the post was similar to the post I don't know what to do anymore you send here, you are now probably considered too "toxic" for the MtF community, because it is too true and too terrible and desperate. I myself don't know how to help you to bear your burden and to find some happines. But for this moment seems me very good to try to cut your interactions with transsexual community and also with other sites dealing with transsexuality. They can only destroy you more and more, because they are focused on the source of your suffering and you need at least to broaden your field of vision to see not only your sexuality and your unrealizable desire. You need to find a way how to work for other people to be appreciated for things unrelated to sex and fill your life with positive activities unrelated to sex and your body and put your problems with sexuality somehow aside for some time.