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Reddit user /u/JuddDredd's Detransition Story

female
took hormones
regrets transitioning
trauma
got top surgery
now infertile
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic.

There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor. The comments display:

  • Specific, complex personal history: The narrative is detailed, emotionally nuanced, and spans years, including therapy, medical steps, pregnancy, and social reconciliation. This is difficult to fabricate consistently.
  • Internal consistency: The story holds together across different comments (e.g., mentioning top surgery and later the inability to breastfeed).
  • Plausible emotional complexity: The user expresses a mix of regret, anger at irresponsible medical/therapeutic practices, self-acceptance, and personal growth. This aligns with the passionate and sometimes angry but deeply personal perspective of genuine detransitioners.

The account seems to be a real person sharing their detransition experience.

About me

I started testosterone and had top surgery because I was a traumatized woman who panicked and thought my female body was the problem. I rushed into a permanent solution when what I really needed was trauma therapy and a breast reduction, not removal. After surgery, I felt empty and realized my mistake, so I slowly stopped hormones and began living as a woman again. Having my son made me feel whole and finally at peace with being a woman, though I deeply regret not being able to breastfeed him. My journey was about escaping pain, not being a man, and I'm now learning to love myself.

My detransition story

Looking back, my whole journey with gender feels like a series of decisions made in a panic, where I was trying to fix a problem without ever really understanding what the problem was. I thought I was trans, but it turns out I was just a woman who had been through a lot of trauma and hated her body in a very specific way.

It all started with my breasts. I hated them. I called them 10-ton saggy flapjacks, and I felt like they were this huge, unbearable weight on my chest. I became convinced they were the source of all my discomfort. My mind was constantly screaming at me, "Do it now! Fix it now! You'll die if you don't!" That horrible anxiety wasn't just about my body; it bled into every part of my life. I couldn't see past getting rid of them.

I did try to get help first. About a year before I started hormones, I went to a therapist. I was honestly looking for someone to talk me down, to help me figure out if this was really the right path. I knew I had a list of traumas a mile long, including being raped multiple times throughout my life. I even suggested to the therapist that maybe these experiences were causing a gender identity crisis. But he never really explored that. He gave me wishy-washy answers when I asked him directly if he thought I was trans. He didn't want to be responsible for anything. When I decided to go on hormones anyway and asked him for a letter of recommendation, he gave it to me even though I hadn't seen him in months, which felt really strange. The clinic I went to didn't even end up needing the letter, which I thought was a good thing at the time for people who couldn't afford therapy, but now I see it as a red flag. I should have trusted my instincts.

After I got top surgery, I expected to feel free, but instead, I just felt empty. It was only after they were gone that I realized my breasts themselves weren't the problem. The problem was their size and how they made me feel. I needed a reduction and reconstruction, not a full removal. I rushed into the most permanent solution because of that panicked voice in my head.

My detransition happened slowly. I never officially "came out" as detransitioning. I just started making changes. I went to a dermatologist and got spiro for my chin acne, which accidentally blocked my testosterone and helped my face and body become more feminine again. I started working out to make my flat chest look more like I was just a thin, flat-chested woman. I grew my hair out and took care of my skin. My style didn't change much, but I started adding slightly more feminine things to my rave outfits. The hardest part was telling my friends I was wrong, but they were amazing and didn't care at all. They love me for me.

The biggest change was getting pregnant and having my son. I honestly feel like a woman for the first time in my life now that I'm a mom. It's a feeling I never had before. I'm even excited about having breasts again, but this time they're the perky, lightweight ones of my dreams. It all worked out somehow, though there are deep regrets. The most depressing part is that I couldn't breastfeed my son because of my surgery. That hurts every day.

I don't regret my journey because it led me to my son and to finally understanding myself. But I do regret not getting the right kind of help sooner. I needed a therapist who would have challenged me and helped me connect my body issues to my trauma, instead of just enabling me. I regret rushing into surgery. If I had worked with a therapist who was actually helpful, I would have realized a reduction was what I really needed.

My thoughts on gender now are that it's complicated, but for me, it was never about being a man. It was about escaping a body that felt like a reminder of pain. I'm at peace now with being a woman with a deep voice—a friend once told me I sound "like 1994," grungey and cool, and I'm happy with that.

Here is a timeline of the main events:

My Age Event
Mid-20s Started seeing a therapist to discuss gender identity and trauma. Felt my concerns about trauma were dismissed.
Late 20s Obtained a letter for HRT from that therapist and started taking testosterone.
Late 20s Underwent top surgery (double mastectomy).
Early 30s Realized I had made a mistake after surgery. Began a slow, social detransition by changing my appearance.
Early 30s Stopped testosterone by using spironolactone for acne, which feminized my body.
Early 30s Got pregnant and had my son. This experience solidified my identity as a woman.

Top Comments by /u/JuddDredd:

5 comments • Posting since October 15, 2020
Reddit user JuddDredd ([Detrans]🦎♀️) explains her personal detransition steps, including using spiro for acne, working out, and how pregnancy made her feel like a woman for the first time.
42 pointsOct 15, 2020
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So I don’t recommend any of this, but just telling you what I did: I went to a dermatologist and asked for spiro for my chin acne - which started blocking my testosterone and sped up the feminization of my face and body. I started working out (cardio and weights) to make my top surgery look less noticeable, its easier to look like a flat chested woman when you’re thin. I started growing out my hair, and taking care of my skin. I’ve never been a very feminine person so my wardrobe essentially stayed the same - I just slowly started introducing more feminine things to my rave outfits (mesh shirts/harem pants/cute sneakers) and started shaving my legs once in a while. And finally (and I really don’t recommend this) - I got pregnant and had a baby... I actually feel like a woman for the first time in my life being a mom. The hardest part was telling my friends I was wrong, but none of them cared, they love me for me.

Reddit user JuddDredd ([Detrans]🦎♀️) comments on encountering hostility from other trans subreddits that are actively campaigning for the r/detrans sub to be shut down.
28 pointsOct 24, 2020
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its being attacked in other subs - I use the Apollo app for Reddit on my phone and when you look up 'detrans' you end up finding really obscure trans subs soapboxing about how this offense sub "needs to go down!"... it smacks of little kids who's whole lives are spent online so they'd actually put the energy into giving a shit about something like this.

Reddit user JuddDredd ([Detrans]🦎♀️) explains how breast reduction, not top surgery, was the solution, and warns against rushing into medical transition.
19 pointsOct 18, 2020
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I’m honestly excited to have breasts back that aren’t my old breasts. I hated those 10 ton saggy flapjacks so much I thought I was trans (and once they were gone, I realized they were the problem all along). Now I get to have the perky lightweight barely there bewbs of my dreams. It all worked out somehow, you know, besides the extreme embarrassment of telling everyone I fucked up and the deeply depressing fact I couldn’t breastfeed my son.

Just take your time. Rushing into surgery is what fucked me up in the first place. If I had really worked on it - with a therapist who was actually helpful - Id have realized a reduction and reconstruction was what I really needed to make peace with them. It took a long time to get over the horrible anxiety in all aspects of my life constantly screaming “do it now! Fix it now! You’ll die if you don’t!” And I still struggle.

Reddit user JuddDredd ([Detrans]🦎♀️) explains how their therapist failed to address a history of trauma and readily provided a letter for HRT, which they now see as a series of red flags.
4 pointsOct 24, 2020
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Before I went on HRT I purposely sought out a therapist almost a year prior. I was looking for someone to talk me down. Instead he suggested that there are many paths to realizing you're trans and would give wishy-washy answers when I flat out asked him if he thought I was. He basically didnt want to responsible for anything, and while I get that, I went in the first place because I was fully aware I had a list of traumas a mile long and needed help and he never once even remotely suggested maybe being raped every couple years my entire life had given me a gender identity crisis, even when I myself suggested it. Before going on HRT I asked him for a letter and he gave one to me even though I hadnt seen him in a couple months - even though he wouldn't help me during talk therapy!? When I went to the clinic they didnt even need it, which I found really suspect, but figured it was better for trans people who cant afford therapists or to jump through hoops. Looking back, I should have trusted all my instincts, because I see are red flags now.

Reddit user JuddDredd ([Detrans]🦎♀️) explains how testosterone made their already deep voice temporarily higher before it returned to an alto range, and shares a compliment that their voice sounds "like 1994," which they interpret as grungey and cool.
3 pointsOct 19, 2020
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I’ve always had a really deep voice for a woman. Testosterone actually made it weirdly squeakier/higher for a while and after it returned back to alto. We exist, its nothing to be ashamed of. A friend once told me (pre t) that my voice sounded “like 1994”... I think they meant grudgey and cool, which is nice. So, just sound like 1994.