This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user's language is nuanced, self-reflective, and emotionally varied (gratitude, frustration, uncertainty, self-deprecation). They engage critically with complex ideas, share personal history (e.g., an abusive dad, mom's insults), and show a consistent, evolving internal monologue about their gender and reasons for desisting. The passion and criticism of the trans community align with known perspectives of some detransitioners/desisters.
About me
I'm a female who started feeling intense discomfort with my developing body as a teenager. I was influenced online to believe I was a man and socially transitioned for years. After a lot of hard thinking, I realized my reasons were based on trauma, a negative view of men, and using transition to escape my other problems. I've decided not to medically transition and am grateful I didn't. I now see my discomfort was about puberty and body image, not being born in the wrong body.
My detransition story
My journey with gender started when I was a teenager. I was really uncomfortable with my body during puberty, especially with developing breasts. I hated them; they felt foreign and wrong on me. I also had a lot of depression and anxiety, and I think looking back, I had very low self-esteem.
I started to explore my gender online and was heavily influenced by what I saw in trans communities. I began to think that all my discomfort was because I was supposed to be a man. I started to socially transition in my late teens. But a lot of the online spaces made me uncomfortable. The way some people talked about womanhood using anime girl stereotypes felt really obnoxious and not at all like the real women I knew. It never felt right to me.
I spent years thinking about medically transitioning. I considered hormones and even top surgery, thinking of it almost like a cosmetic procedure to fix the parts of my body I hated. But I could never bring myself to make a final decision because I was never sure. I had a feeling that my reasons for wanting to transition weren't great, but it took me a long time to finally figure out what they were.
After a lot of hard thinking, I finally cracked my brain open and saw my real reasons. They weren't about a true gender identity. I think a big part was my upbringing. My mom would often insult men, and I had an abusive dad. I think I internalized a negative view of masculinity and was trying to escape from being a man. It was a way to jump to a safe spot. I also used the idea of transition as a form of escapism from my other problems, like my depression and anxiety.
I’ve come to realize that my discomfort was more about puberty and body image issues, maybe even a form of body dysmorphia, rather than being born in the wrong body. I don't believe that your sex can change. I always thought it was weird that more people in the trans community didn't agree with that, since the terminology itself implies a change from one state to another.
I’ve made my decision now to not pursue any medical transition. I feel a bit weird about it, but also sure. I don't regret exploring it, because it led me here to a better understanding of myself, but I do regret how much time I spent stuck in that confused headspace. I benefited from not rushing into therapy that would have just affirmed my confusion; instead, I did a LOT of my own thinking to work it out.
I don't have any serious health complications from transition because I never took hormones or had surgery. I'm grateful for that. My thoughts on gender now are that it's an incredibly complicated issue, and for me, it wasn't a real thing to grasp onto. It was a solution I tried to apply to a different set of problems.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 13 | Started puberty; began to feel intense discomfort and hatred toward my developing breasts. |
| 16 | Heavily influenced by online trans communities; began to socially identify as non-binary. |
| 17 | Started to socially transition and consider a male identity. |
| 18 | Began seriously considering medical transition (hormones and top surgery) but felt unsure. |
| 20 | Started to critically analyze my reasons for transitioning and felt discomfort with online trans culture. |
| 21 | Recognized that my desire to transition was rooted in trauma, escapism, and body dysmorphia. |
| 22 | Made the final decision to detransition and not pursue any medical interventions. |
Top Comments by /u/Key_Equipment_9449:
No, please be blunt! We are here to talk and discuss, not to lay down laws. I do agree about everyone having a reason, I recently edited my post because of that. I'm not going to lie, they aren't really great reasons but they've found a way to steer me here, and for that I'm interested in them. I get the eggshells thing, when I was just starting to experiment it certainly felt like that. Then again, I find everyone is always doing something like that until I just go and say the stupid crap I want to. The difference between the two lives is no doubt gigantic, but that's something I've been thinking for years and just didn't say it because... PEOPLE! Anyways, have a good day and thanks!
First, thanks for sharing your opinion and experiences! Second, a dumber thing, technically speaking the grass is actually greener on the female side. Women see grass as a greener colour than men. I agree about sex not changing, and I think it's weird that more people don't, since it's built into the transgender terminology. Sorry for the dumb comment. Thank you!
Sorry, last comment: I agree, about the trans community. It's so weird to walk around them because the pictures of anime girls just make me feel uncomfortable; they are such obnoxious stereotypes of womanhood(not that I can give a much better view myself, XD), acting in ways I've never seen people act before. Arms raised at the side of the chest is always going to piss me off. Sorry to bug you again, and thank you!
Gotta be honest, I am at the point of thinking of it cosmetically just because of how complicated gender is as an issue and as something graspable(IDK if that's a word). I'm actually Canadian, it's just that America's impact here and on the internet is gigantic. I was taught about "right" and "left" in school before I was taught about OUR OWN government. Regardless, thank you for sharing your experience and your opinions!
I think the comment was just talking about upbringing and that's why I thought it made so much sense. I mean, you aren't going to be raised the same way and you aren't going to have the same experiences. I have actually made my decision, and I feel really weird about it, but I'm glad to see people are still offering their advice and opinions not only to me, but anyone else who finds this post. Thank you!
Yeah, the reasons are trash, just what I found after finally cracking my brain open and seeing them. Your thinking on reason C is really interesting and makes ideas I've heard before actually make sense(or at least more)! I figure it has to do more with my mom insulting men for being men quite often, as well as an abusive dad, but that very well could be me jumping to a safe spot now that I'm confronted, so thank you! I always enjoy(if you can call it that) a chance to think over something I haven't thought about a million times. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, it's always helpful!
The comment about pointing towards was just to give scale and an idea of the situation for the question, which I meant to write very blankly. I like your ideas about these scales and their likeliness, and think they are a good description of it. Some more to think about today! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Fantastic answer! Thanks for taking the time to share your experience and opinion. I agree with the medical angle, I've been thinking for years now about it, but I'm not going to make any final decisions until I'm sure. Personally, I don't like therapy so instead I do a LOT of thinking, but to each their own. Anyways, have a good day!