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Reddit user /u/MiaIsabellaWannabe's Detransition Story

male
took hormones
regrets transitioning
escapism
depression
body dysmorphia
anxiety
only transitioned socially
autistic
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no clear red flags indicating it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.

The user's perspective is extreme and contains inaccuracies, but it is consistent, emotionally charged, and demonstrates a deep, personal investment in the topic. The language is passionate and contains specific, albeit controversial, claims that reflect the intense anger and regret some detransitioners/desisters feel. This aligns with the warning that such users can be "very passionate and pissed off." The account does not exhibit the repetitive, low-effort, or nonsensical patterns typical of inauthentic bots.

About me

I'm a man in my early forties who believed I was a trans woman for nearly two decades. My desire to transition came from deep unhappiness, mental health struggles, and likely being autistic, and I saw it as an escape from my problems. I woke up to the reality that surgery causes severe, lifelong complications and doesn't fix the underlying issues. I'm grateful I never had any irreversible procedures done. Now, I'm focused on healing from the trauma and mental health problems that led me down that path in the first place.

My detransition story

My journey with this started a long time ago. I identified as a transsexual for many years, but I never had surgery. I’m really glad I didn't, because from everything I've seen and read, it causes lifelong problems. I want to share my story to maybe help someone else avoid making a mistake they can't take back.

Looking back, I think a lot of my desire to transition came from a place of deep unhappiness and a disturbed view of myself and the world. I had a lot of mental health struggles, including depression and anxiety, and I think I had a form of body dysmorphia. I also believe I'm on the autism spectrum, and I've learned that many transsexuals are autistic. It makes sense to me now that having trouble interpreting social signals could lead to a confused view of your own gender.

I also saw how common it is for people who transition to have a history of trauma or other personality disorders. I think for me, and for many others, transitioning was seen as a way to solve all these deep-seated problems. It was a form of escapism. I thought becoming a woman would fix everything that was wrong with my life. But the truth is, it doesn't work that way. The underlying issues are still there.

I started to see the reality of surgery, which is often called SRS. The trans community online paints it as this wonderful, life-saving procedure, but that's a fairytale. The results are not good. It's a barbaric surgery that leaves people with a permanently damaged body. I've read so many accounts from people who had the surgery and deeply regret it. They talk about constant infections, hair growing inside the surgically created cavity, and painful scar tissue. The process of dilation, which you have to do forever to keep the cavity open, is exhausting and painful. Many people just give up and let it close.

What really opened my eyes was seeing how the trans movement operates. It's incredibly aggressive and narcissistic. Anyone who questions the party line is immediately called transphobic and silenced. This includes people who have had surgery and are now regretful. Their stories are hidden because they don't fit the perfect narrative. The movement is dominated by people with serious mental health issues, and they are trying to force everyone else to adapt to their distorted worldview.

I also realized that long-term studies show that mental health often gets worse 10 to 15 years after surgery. Suicide rates are still high. Many transsexuals live lonely, reclusive lives, and end up asexual because their new anatomy doesn't function like they hoped and dating becomes incredibly difficult. Their lifespans are shorter. This isn't a success story; it's a tragedy.

I never got to the point of surgery myself. I'm a man who lived as a trans woman for a time, but I never went through with the medical procedures. I'm fortunate that I woke up to the reality before I did irreversible damage to my body. I don't regret exploring my identity, but I deeply regret ever believing that changing my body was the answer. The real work is dealing with the mental health problems and trauma underneath. For me, that’s where healing actually begins.

Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:

Age Event
Late Teens / Early 20s Started to believe I was trans. This was influenced by my own depression, anxiety, and likely being autistic. I saw it as an escape.
20s - 30s Lived socially as a trans woman. I took hormones for a period of time.
Late 30s Began to question the trans movement. I saw the aggressive tactics and the poor long-term outcomes for people who had surgery. I realized my underlying issues were not solved by transitioning.
Early 40s Stopped identifying as trans. I detransitioned socially and stopped taking hormones. I accepted that transitioning was a mistake for me and focused on addressing my real mental health needs.

Top Comments by /u/MiaIsabellaWannabe:

5 comments • Posting since June 1, 2019
Reddit user MiaIsabellaWannabe explains why they chose not to have SRS, describing the surgery as barbaric, irreversible, and prone to causing lifelong health issues and dating struggles.
19 pointsJun 1, 2019
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I’m a transsexual myself, sweetheart. The reason that SRS surgeries are so barbaric and irreversible are the reason I speak up about it. I’m fortunate not to have had SRS. I will never be a real woman either way. Better to be a fake woman with a dick than a fake woman with an inverted penis hole that is prone to fungi and infections. I’m not looking down or mocking those who have had SRS. I feel empathy for them and their life long struggles of having an irreversibly damaged body and dating life.

Reddit user MiaIsabellaWannabe explains the importance of educating younger people about the potential for SRS regret and the procedure's lifelong damage to prevent others from making a huge mistake.
9 pointsJun 1, 2019
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I’m sure the people who have transitioned surgically ( SRS ) and regret it think it’s very important to educate younger people as well. If we can prevent someone from making a huge mistake, why wouldn’t we? SRS results are not great and leave lifelong damage. We shouldn’t hide that.

Reddit user MiaIsabellaWannabe explains their strong language against SRS, calling it a barbaric amputation that causes mental and physical trauma, and cites studies showing mental health decline 10-15 years post-op.
5 pointsJun 1, 2019
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Hey, actually I hold no rage at all. I just wanted to make the statement clear what the consequences of SRS can be. Therefor I used strong language that would bring the point across. SRS is positioned as a sophisticated and highly successful surgery while it’s actually a barbaric and medieval amputation that costs lots of money and leaves people mentally and physically traumatized. Mental health declines significantly 10-15 years post-op, backed up by multiple studies. At one point Medicaid wanted proof that SRS improves quality of life because there simply was no evidence that SRS added to someone’s feeling of well being and physical health. Ultimately political correctness won and Medicaid had to cover SRS.

Reddit user MiaIsabellaWannabe explains the long-term negative outcomes of SRS, including physical complications, shorter lifespans, asexuality, unfulfilled expectations, mental health struggles, loneliness, and social reclusion.
4 pointsJun 1, 2019
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Even the ones who were correctly diagnosed were not helped long term by undergoing SRS. They sooner or later are guaranteed to run into physical problems with their surgically created cavities and starting from 10-15 years after SRS their lifespans are significantly shorter than those of the general population according to studies. The ones who have had SRS generally end up asexual after a while, keep having mental problems because the cavity didn’t live up to their expectations of a real vagina and generally they grow old alone. Most of them don’t have lifelong partners. Especially not those who transition young. Because no straight cis person wants to grow old with them. They generally live their lives as recluses as well. The trouble never really go away. Their lives aren’t saved, they are still jeopardized by the medical world. Get to know a few of them, have a look at their subs. Happy and fulfilling lives are not something they achieve after SRS.

Reddit user MiaIsabellaWannabe explains the severe physical and mental health complications of SRS, the silencing of regretters, and critiques the trans movement as promoting unrealistic expectations while being dominated by fetishists and individuals with mental disorders.
3 pointsJun 1, 2019
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I think your 20 year old self has been sold a Tumblr-esque vision on SRS. If you look around trans subs you will basically see posts every single dat about people experiencing problems with their mental and physical health after going through SRS. The trans community immediately dismisses that by calling it post-op depression due to anesthesia, which is bullshit. Cisgender people don’t all end up vastly depressed after a major surgery. A bit tired maybe, but not depressed. Transgender people all go through serious depression after SRS. Many because they discover it’s not the holy grail it was touted to be.

Regretters are silenced by the trans community. Every single day there are regretters or longterm transitioned people on the verge of suicide, who question the trans movement when SRS has not delivered what was promised. When the distress and anxiety remains and they are now left with permanently mutilated genitalia. These people are quickly removed from trans subs by the trans agenda.

You only see the fairytales on transpassing and transtimelines but those are only 1 or 2 pictures of people that have been taken from perfect angles, been filtered and photoshopped. For all you know these people who appear to be so happy could be deteriorating behind closed doors. It’s very common to retain lifelong mental health problems as a transitioned individual.

Many transsexuals who have had SRS have hair growing inside the vagina after SRS because the laser didn’t catch all the follicles, follicles were latently dormant or the technician missed certain follicles.

The created cavity often starts forming granulation tissue or scar tissue and necrotic tissue inside the neovaginal cavity. The male pelvis is already seriously narrower than the female pelvis so while the neovagina will already be much narrower, dilating will get even more painful with scar tissue inside your cavity. Many many transsexuals eventually give up on dilating and let the cavity close up slowly. Because dilation becomes painful and time-consuming after a little while. Despite the trans community touting that regular intercourse will take care of all your dilation needs. Simply not true. Have a look at the many YouTube videos from desperate transsexuals who are mentally and physically exhausted by having to insert a prosthetic inside their surgically created cavities day after day. Julie Vu is a transgender woman who was very clear about her SRS. Given the chance, she would not do it again. She let it close up. She has anal sex again.

What also starts to annoy the cis world and what opens the eyes of some trans people who become gender critical is the violentness of the trans movement. Promoting violence against women who don’t indulge their fantasies and delusions, trying to guilt trip and accuse people of transphobia for literally everything from personal opinions to you name it. The movement is extremely narcissistic. Everything has to be centered around dysphoria in the world. A small minority asks the vast majority to completely adapt their life to that minority. And if someone dares to protest: they are accused of transphobia.

Mental health of most transsexuals post-transition is still worrisome. Suicidal ideation, coping mechanisms like drugs and drinking are still so very common even after successful transitions and it’s not all to blame on society. It’s largely to blame on unrealistic expectations of the trans individual and their disturbed world view and how everyone should exist to accomodate them. Body dysmorphia is very common in this group.

Many transsexuals also live lonely and reclusive lives. The percentage of asperger transsexuals is huge. More than any other group of society. Autigender is a recognised concept. Autists have significantly more difficulties to interpret social signals and may have a disordered view on their own gender because of this disturbed ability to interpret social signals.

Many transsexuals have also been sexually abused as children and transition because of childhood trauma that makes them believe that changing sexes will solve all their problems.

Other personality disorders like schizophrenia, borderline and so on are also very common in the trans population.

This is a group that consists of mostly mentally disordered people and these people have set up a movement and this movement is now dominating politics and politically and socially oppressing every other group in society.

That’s why it goes wrong, why people are losing their patience with the trans community.

Adult men calling themselves little girls and whining about girlhoods that they never have had and connotating sexual reactions to crossdressing they may have experienced as genuine gender dysphoria. Surgeons are not stopping them. SRS’s bring in enough cash. This is what you get when a movement dominated by middle aged fetishists and by mentally disordered people dominates the social and political landscape.

Lieing, gaslighting, oppressing are all things that trans women are known to do to get whatever they want.

It has nothing to do with the radical feminists. It has to do with the deception and aggression of the trans movement itself.

Thank you.