While i love your analogy , i disagree. Men shouldn't be in women's spaces as much as women shouldn't be in men's spaces. It doesn't matter if you "pass" , or can act good enough to appear feminine or masculine , your birth sex is still the same. There has been too much unnecessary priviliges given to trans people it's ludicrous.

Women's rights are taken away , and it's very bad when men who identify as trans are allowed to be in women shelters for rape victims or domestic abuse for women.

I'm sorry for my rant. This isn't an attack on your post or on you personally. I just feel alot of anger and dread for the way things are going with this movement

Yeah definitely. I listen to alot of detrans stories and more right wing stuff , also love to listen to some radical feminist stuff because it helped me to accept myself as a woman again and made me realize how much internalized misogyny i had inside of me.

You answered your own question. Due to your own traumatic experiences you thought you were trans. When you have BPD your identity shifts constantly , it isn't stable. It is tempting to create another persona to escape yourself and the trauma , as a sort of shield and wall to put up when others truelly want to get close to you. You have alot of insight in yourself , so please listen to your own logic and reasoning for why you have doubts.

Getting your healthy breasts removed is traumatic , it will only add to the layer of the pain you already feel inside.

I was diagnosed with bpd at a young age , i also experienced sexual trauma and the developmental delay , which also made me think i was trans and caused me to dissociate from myself and hating my body due to shame and disgust of what happened in the past (sexual trauma).

There are unfortanely alot of women who go this route of transitioning because of the sexual trauma they experienced. You are trying to run away from it , but no matter how much bodyparts you chop off , alter yourself with hormones , it's never going to be enough , because it doesn't solve anything.

With BPD , and i'm really sorry you go through this , i know how excruciating this disorder can be , you are like you said still a little kid inside , and making decisions like getting surgery isn't something you can actually consent too , because you have such a developmental delay. It also causes magical thinking , which also made me make decisions without realizing the consequences or how it would be if i did end up regretting it. I wasn't emotionally mature enough to even make a decision like that. But unfortanely it doesn't matter for the surgeons , the doctors who push us on this conveyor belt of getting limbs chopped off , they earn good money and can experiment on us due that we are so mentally unwell and lack the insight a mentally well person would have.

No mentally well person would even consider amputation of their breasts or alter their gentials. It's very invasive and traumatic. Really think about that.

I had top surgery , and i can tell you that as someone who can relate alot with your personal story , it doesn't solve anything , it just adds to the pain and trauma.

I hope you reconsider and realize that

The only thing that would be a good idea is to get therapy for how to deal with your bpd and work through your sexual trauma .

I got into therapy after i had several surgeries and was on hormones for years. If i had known that therapy was the right decision i wouldn't be were i was now. You can still get away from it with your body intact. So please cherish your own body and leave it as it is. You don't need to change anything to be yourself.

I would say please embrace your male body. You are 19 , and while you are convinced now , your brain isn't even fully developed yet to even consider the consequences of doing unreversible surgeries and treatment , that will be life long , till the day you die. Can you imagine yourself 10 years or even 20 years from now? You can't just reverse these changes.

I would advice you to listen to stories of mtf detransitioners so you can understand the anguish and severity of having healthy bodyparts amputated , when all they actually needed (including myself) was therapy , not surgeries or hormones.

The horror of realizing what you did to your body and that this is your life now is something i would want to spare every single person who even thinks of going down this path.

For me i was 24 when i had several surgeries done. I detransitioned when i was in my 30's. I'm now 37. Admitting to yourself and other people that this was a mistake is horrifying and extremely painful.

While people who are on youtube and other platforms claim to be so happy even after having terrifying complications , that this was right for them , it isn't reality , speaking out negatively about the surgeries and hormones is being stiffled because it breaks the illusion that it is possible to change your biological sex with medical interventions and hormones. It's just cosmetic , so you look and appear to the outside world that you are a man or woman. All the while needing constant affirmation that you are indeed the opposite sex now , but you are still your biological sex. Your dna and male body inside is still the same. You can't change that.

So i would say to you please reconsider getting anything done and just be a feminine man without the medical stuff. It's fine to wear women's clothes and express yourself this way. No need to cutt off healthy bodyparts to feel whole inside.

Really question why you think being trans is helping you and why you want to go down this path. Why is it so bad to accept your natural body. What is so wrong with your natural body that you need to alter it into something your not. What are you running away from or denying deep inside yourself that makes you think the way you are now is wrong?

I hope this helps. And if you still feel like you need to do this and it's right for you , i wish you all the best and hope you won't end up regretting it.

I have been on testosterone for about 7 years. Not sure if it was when i stopped taking t or not , but I have to pee constantly.

When i drink something i have to go to the bathroom 5 minutes later , it is very frustrating and annoying.

The feeling of needing to pee when i actually don't have to pee happens alot as well. Pain and discomfort in my stomache/bladder area , sometimes i have stabbing pain/jabs in that area also.

I haven't seen the video you mentioned , so i'm gonna look that up now :)

hope this information helps

I got a mastectomy at 24 years old. I'm now 37.

The only thing i would give as advice , speaking from personal experience , is that there is no reason in the world that cutting off healthy bodyparts is a good idea , only if you have breast cancer and it's urgent and truelly life saving that this surgery should be performed.

It's delusional to think it would improve anything , other than perhaps looking more like a man. Top surgery as we like to call it , sounds cutesy and easy. Like it isn't a big deal.

The reality is that this is a very invasive , painful and intense experience of having you're breasts removed. You're nipples can die off. I had one nipple that got necrotic and fell off.

The scarring , the numb feeling on the chest that feels very uncomfortable to touch. Nerves that get fu.ked in the chest area. So some spots are sensitive , other spots not . The sensation in the nipples will either be numb , painful or uncomfortable. You're chest feels very tight and this also fu.ks with breathing in and out.

And if you regret it , they say you can just do a breast reconstruction to have boobs again. It's a fantasy , what was lost will never be like it was ever again.

. It's delusional and the only right answer here is to just accept your body as it is. Like many other women and girls on here who had heir breasts removed , they will all say the same thing. Don't to this to your body. Spare yourself the agony and grief when the regret sets in and now you have to live with this till the day you die.

Imagine how that would be like and how that would impact your romantic relationships in the future and your sexual life. The jealousy you will feel towards women who still have their natural breasts.

This stuff they won't say , but that is the harsh reality of it. So i really hope you won't amputate anything from your body , and if you still want to go through with it , i hope you won't end up regretting it and put yourself in detransition hell.

First off i want to say that it's oke and there is nothing wrong with you. I'm sorry you are going through this confusion. Most of us on here who are detransitioners know how painful it is and you shouldn't have to deal with this kind of anguish.

I'm glad you are still here , and i wish you didn't had to go through that.

There is a way out of this and although it might seem impossible now , you can get through this.

You have to stop fighting with yourself. The truth is , and i wish i could say it gently.. that it is pure escapism.

You will never be able to be a biological man. No surgeries or hormones will ever make you achieve that. It is a fantasy. An escape from yourself.

Having attempted suicide from such a young age , i can't even imagine how difficult that must've been for you and how strong you actually are that you survived , you are still standing. That makes you strong and resillient. Don't ever forget that.

The only way out of this gender anguish is to accept your natural body. And if it's possible talk with a therapist about it. A therapist that will not force you to transition or affirm the fantasy. But who truelly listens to you and can help you get to the root of wanting to escape to being someone else.

I wish you all the best

Hello , i'm from the netherlands and had a breast reconstruction done in Amsterdam hospital VU.

The way i was able to get a breast reconstruction done was complicated but i will tell you how i was able to get it. It's gonna be a long story , but i hope it will help you.

I had to go back to the genderclinic in amsterdam hospital to explain to a gender therapist that i had regret of my transition.

This started out when i stopped taking testerone and wanted to get back on estrogen and wanted to try to get a breast reconstruction done. I also had a hysterectomy so my body doesn't produce my natural hormones anymore.

I got in touch with a gender therapist and i had to explain to her why i regretted my transition. Fortunaly the woman who was my therapist was a really sweet woman , but it was very obvious she had no idea that regret was a thing. She told me that only less than 1% had regret , so apparently i was a very interesting case to her.

I had to write down why i regretted my transition and how i came to the conlusion of regret. After many sessions with her she helped me to look for a way for me to get breast reconstruction done.

Mind you this was back in 2018/2019. I have no idea how the therapists are now and will be so willing to listen to someone who expresses regret , so i would tread carefully in this.

I also want to say that getting breast reconstruction surgery is very invasive. And you should keep in mind that it is another big commitment you have to prepare yourself for. Since our breasts were cut off and the breast area surface is flat , they will have to expand your skin so they are able to put implants in.

This requires a surgery to put in bags in your chest that they will fill up with saline solution. To expand the bags and in turn expand your skin. They use a syringe to fill up the bags. This can be painful , and the feeling of the bags inside you're chest can also feel uncomfortable. You will have to do this several times over. After that you will have another surgery to get the implants in.

As for the implants , i was able to choose the size i wanted and what kind of implant i wanted.

I was also able to get the surgery done for free.

I hope this helps :)

I quit taking steroids cold turkey. It definitely was very hard on me emotionally. I wasn't able to cry while i was on steroids so when i stopped taking it a flood of emotions i wasn't able to express before came flooding out in waves and it was really hard to deal with and having withdrawel from not taking this substance anymore , but you can get through this.

The funny thing is that when i was giving testosterone i wasn't even aware i was taking actual steroids. I was really naive and believed in the whole second puberty thing.

I don't know how it will be if you taper it off slowly , but i think it will be a bit better in dealing with all the emotions and withdrawel that kicks in. These are psychoactive drugs , so it will be tough , and it takes time for your body to adjust again , so take it slowly and make sure you have support that will help you get through this.

This is absolute insanity and vile beyond words. How delusional , stupid and degrading do you have to be to even consider this as a good thing , as something to be celebrated. That man should be in prison , the so called med assistance team should be stripped off their licences and be imvestigated. This screams pdf on so many levels. I can't even.. that poor baby should be taken away from that monster.