This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the comments provided, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user's comments show:
- Consistent, nuanced perspectives on gender, transition, and detransition that align with complex, lived experience.
- Emotional variability, ranging from passionate anger (in responses to incel rhetoric) to empathetic, supportive advice for other users, which is typical of a real person.
- Personal insight, such as referencing their own age (25) and history with transition, which adds credibility.
The passion and anger displayed are consistent with a genuine detransitioner or desister who is critically engaged with the topic, not an indicator of inauthenticity.
About me
I was born female and my journey started when I identified as non-binary and then as a trans man to escape the pressures of womanhood. I took testosterone and enjoyed the physical changes, but I realized my comfort came from the specific effects, not from being seen as male. I see now that my drive to transition was a form of escapism from depression and low self-esteem. I no longer identify with any gender label and am comfortable in my body as it is. My biggest regret is wasting so much mental energy on labels instead of working on my core issues directly.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender has been complicated, but it wasn't really about gender at its core. I was born female, and when I was younger, I started identifying as non-binary. It felt like a way to escape from the pressures and expectations that came with being a woman. I had a lot of anxiety and low self-esteem, and I think I was heavily influenced by what I saw online. It seemed like a solution to a deep discomfort I felt, but I now see that discomfort was more about puberty and general teenage misery than anything inherent about my sex.
After a while, I moved from identifying as non-binary to identifying as a trans man. I started taking testosterone. I have to be honest, I enjoyed the changes from testosterone. My voice dropped, I grew more body hair, and I felt more comfortable in my body. But the important thing I realized was that my comfort wasn't tied to being seen as a man. It was about liking the specific physical changes. I came to understand that my presentation is completely divorced from any internal sense of gender. I don't really believe in it anymore. In an ideal world, anyone could just have the body they feel best in without having to adopt a specific gender label.
I never had any surgeries. I did hate my breasts for a long time and considered top surgery, but I'm glad now that I didn't go through with it. My thinking has changed so much. I don't regret taking testosterone because I do like the permanent effects it had on me, but I regret getting so caught up in the identity politics of it all. I spent so much time worrying about what box I fit into, when I should have just been focusing on what made me comfortable as an individual.
Looking back, a lot of my drive to transition was a form of escapism. I was depressed and found it hard to be a teenager. I thought changing my gender would fix my problems, but it doesn't work like that. The problems were inside me, not in my body. I benefited from stepping away from trans communities and just thinking for myself. I had to break out of the trap of thinking "if I do X, I must be Y gender." That line of thinking is just another form of sexist stereotypes. You don't have to be a certain gender to want certain things or act a certain way.
Now, I just am. I'm comfortable in the body I have, which has been shaped by testosterone, but I don't identify as a man or a woman. I don't feel the need to label it. My main regret is the mental energy I wasted on trying to fit into a category, when I could have been working on my self-esteem and anxiety directly. My advice to anyone questioning is to forget about gender labels for a while and just focus on what specific things—clothes, pronouns, medical changes—make you feel good, without attaching a bigger meaning to them.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 14-15 | Started identifying as non-binary, influenced by online communities. |
| 17 | Began identifying as a trans man. |
| 18 | Started taking testosterone. |
| 22 | Began to question the connection between my body comfort and gender identity. |
| 25 | Stopped identifying with any gender label; realized my comfort with a testosterone-shaped body was separate from social gender. |
Top Comments by /u/No_Deer_3949:
a whole week is still nothing in comparison to the years of hormones your body produces/has produced. your own body chemistry can produce just as much estrogen as that low dose naturally and if you had gotten your levels tested there is no way that your estrogen would have been outside of what's normal for a man at a low dose for a couple of days.
basically, it wouldn't have even registered to a blood test or put you outside of any norms for men. I understand your fears about this but like the other commenter said, this is an incredible amount of anxiety involving something that would have been absolutely negligible. please be assured that it would not have any effect.
do you think that everyone hates incels because they personally just can't see the truth? have you considered you live in an entirely different reality than every other well adjusted person on earth lives in?
where do you hear women say this? what do they say exactly? what do the women say exactly? do you think the entire critique of toxic masculinity is just for funsies and that all women just secretly love guys who are jackasses? if you do, consider that accusing women of 'secretly liking it when men mistreat them.' is... kind of what rapists do.
how does 'all women hate men' and 'all women love chads' work? have you considered you think they think that because you specifically are only attracted to men for one thing only so you assume that every woman on earth feels the same way?
why do you think that people culturally think that the guy who goes around saying 'nice guys finish last, all women want are chads' sucks?
my last thing is this: I agree that you shouldn't have a family if you think this way about women. i wouldn't trust that any possible daughter you have wouldn't end up needing therapy because one of her parents believes that she's just going to grow up to hate men and love chads.
with all due respect, get therapy. the way you talk about women is fucked up and uncomfortable.
'all women in my life are bigot misandrists' is certainly an opinion you'll form if the women in your life rightfully respond to your incel rhetoric. do you want them to be nice to you when you're talking about how they only go for chads? do you think any woman ever had appreciated or liked being told this type of thing?
do you think that whining about women disliking how you think they all just go after chads should result in them being nice to you and giving you a chance?
I mean this from the bottom of my heart: get a fucking grip.
you live in a reality where you think that all possible women you could interact with are just bigots who hate men. reality isn't 'subjective' when you're saying things like this. someone's 'reality' that the world only has racists in it because they're in an environment where that's the only attitude doesn't actually make it true. it just means they think that the entire world is composed of experiences and people that they know about. especially if they are LOOKING for that type of mindset and refuse to consider anything other than that.
have you considered that if all women were radical feminists there would be a lot less men in charge? what's your logic there? all women hate men and want them to die and also men are in charge and prevent women from getting access to abortions? if all women were as extreme as you think they are, it seems like this wouldn't be true.
do you think that because mein kampf exists this must mean all german people hate jewish people? how do you possibly reconcile the logic in your head that everyone lives on the end of a bell curve?
you shouldn't be thinking of yourself as a threat to women. if men were a threat to women who could not help themselves or that it was in their nature feminism would be armed with guns.
you acting like you have no choice but to be a threat IS a danger, because it makes you less likely to hold yourself responsible and to work on being less of a threat and to actually be an ally to women.
'im a man so I'm inherently dangerous to women' is a cowards way out of examining your privilege and the ways you exist in society. no one is going to give you points for acting like this. it just makes you seem more dangerous for acting like you have no choice but to be violent to women.
Yeah, this is nuts. You're nuts.
you thinking that women being prevented from access to abortion, being abused, killed, and sexually assaulted by men is an 'illusion' is the reason women probably say they hate you specifically, and I'd say honestly, yeah. you probably deserve it for acting like this.
all you want from a woman is for her to be nice to you and not go 'hey, you fucking suck' while you believe weird, fucked up things about her, and you don't deserve that.
by all means, put this in your pile of 'proof', I guess. im sure you'll ignore the fact that you've expressed some pretty detached from what actually occurs in everyday normal people's lives and then continue on to ask yourself 'why are women so mean to me? why don't women like it when I say fucked up things about them?'
you didn't detransiton in order to become or do or present the way others expect you to. falling into the trap of 'im x, therefore I must y' or 'i do y, therefore I must be X' is kind of the whole problem in the first place.
it sounds like you should work on figuring out what YOU want, and not just doing/avoiding doing things based on what gender you feel doing that thing makes you. that just ends up being sexism again, and you don't deserve to inflict that into yourself.
you seem to be partly aware of this but genuinely, seriously, you don't deserve to spend your time worrying about that kind of logic, especially the whole 'what would a cis woman do?' because that's just...kind of assuming that cis women are some monolith who perform appropriately womanly actions as opposed to just....actions they'd like to take.
yeah, the way this person talks about women has me like, oh, yeah. of course. it makes sense that this person wouldn't feel respected by women and requireing women to be 'not a bigot misamdrist' seems more about the women in their life putting up with the incel rhetoric and not rightfully being like 'i want nothing to do with you.'
If you're not of a particular gender, why would you be comfortable with your birth gender? If you're not of a particular gender like "woman," why would you be comfortable wearing a dress?
I'm still thinking things over for the direction of my transition but I'm still more comfortable in a testosterone dominant body and the effects it's had on me. I enjoy the changes it's had on me over the years, and I've come to realize that's outside of any gendered context, regardless of whether people read me as a man or a woman.
I feel like in all honesty, this question might be a little counter productive. Some people are just more comfortable one way over the other.
Current trans spaces already require you to identify as xyz gender to justify wanting to present in a certain way. My presentation is divorced from my gender. In an ideal world, that's how it is for everybody else, too. What benefit could we gain from thinking that you would need to identify as a particular gender to want certain things?
I know it can feel like this, especially because 3 years IS a huge chunk of your life when you're 15, but now being 25 when I look back on the same time period of my life I thought was the most important ever that would effect me forever and never be able to move past, I realize it really just....isn't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. break ups and friendships and school and self harm and drug abuse just....it's incredible how much last year and the year before that actually has an effect on your current everyday life.
you're young and you have a future ahead of you, full of a lot more joy and friendship and love than you can see now. I genuinely promise that. 'it gets better' isn't just about being trans, it's about being a teenager in a shit situation and eventually, you'll find yourself with more autonomy and ability to control your life than you do now. being a teenager sucks ass for a lot of people.