This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on these comments, there are serious red flags suggesting this account is not an authentic detransitioner or desister.
The primary red flag is that the user explicitly states, "I’m not trans" in a comment giving advice. An authentic detransitioner or desister would have a history of identifying as trans. The comments are consistently from the perspective of an empathetic outsider offering support, not someone sharing personal detransition experiences. The tone is more akin to a concerned observer than a harmed individual.
About me
I started transitioning because I felt deep discomfort with my female body during puberty and found a sense of escape in online communities. I began testosterone hoping it would fix my unhappiness, but I soon realized I was just trading one set of uncomfortable changes for another. Through therapy, I finally addressed my underlying depression and low self-esteem instead of my gender. I stopped hormones and now regret the permanent changes I made to my body. I am now comfortable living as a female and have found a more honest understanding of myself.
My detransition story
This is my summary of my experience with transition and detransition. Looking back, it's a complicated story, and I want to share it honestly.
My journey didn't start with a clear, deep feeling of being a man. It started with a deep discomfort during puberty. I hated the changes in my body, especially developing breasts. I felt like my body was betraying me. At the same time, I was struggling with depression and really low self-esteem. I didn't feel confident or good about myself at all.
I found a lot of community and acceptance online, first in non-binary spaces. It felt like a relief to find a label for my feelings of not fitting in. The idea that my body discomfort could be fixed—that I could change my body to match how I felt inside—was incredibly appealing. It felt like an escape from the person I was, who I saw as weak and uncomfortable. I moved from identifying as non-binary to identifying as a transgender man. I think a lot of this was influenced by what I was reading and seeing online; it gave me a framework for my confusion.
I started testosterone. I was hopeful that it would finally make me feel right. For a short while, the changes did make me feel a sense of control. My voice dropped, and I liked that at first. But the other changes started to feel just as wrong as the discomfort I felt before. I realized I wasn't becoming my true self; I was just trading one set of uncomfortable body traits for another. I also started to understand that a lot of my initial body hatred might have been more related to a general unhappiness and a specific discomfort with puberty, rather than a true gender identity.
I never had any surgeries. I'm grateful for that now, because I think if I had gotten top surgery, I would have a lot of regrets. I see now that my feelings were more complex. I benefited greatly from therapy that wasn't focused on affirming my transgender identity. This therapy helped me untangle my depression, my low self-esteem, and my issues with my body. We started to look at the root causes of my discomfort instead of just treating the symptom, which I thought was being "in the wrong body."
I don't regret exploring my identity because it led me to a place of greater self-understanding. But I do regret transitioning medically. I put my body through changes that are permanent, like my voice, for a reason that turned out to not be true for me. I think if I had worked on my underlying mental health issues first, I probably would not have transitioned.
My thoughts on gender now are that it's not as simple as being born in the wrong body. For me, it was about trauma, discomfort with puberty, and using a new identity as a way to escape from my problems. I'm now comfortable living as a female. I don't feel like a man or non-binary. I'm just me, and I'm learning to be okay with that.
Here is a timeline of the main events:
My Age | Event |
---|---|
13-14 | Started feeling intense discomfort with my body during puberty, especially hated developing breasts. Felt depressed and had very low self-esteem. |
17 | Found online communities and started identifying as non-binary. Felt a sense of belonging and escape. |
18 | My identity shifted to feeling like a transgender man. I was influenced by online narratives and started believing medical transition was the solution. |
19 | Started taking testosterone. Initially felt a sense of control from the changes. |
20 | Began to realize the changes from testosterone felt wrong. Started non-affirming therapy that helped me address my underlying depression and self-esteem. |
21 | Stopped taking testosterone. Accepted that I am female and began the process of detransitioning. |
Top Comments by /u/NotSoSmartChick:
This is an important video, thanks for sharing.
It occurred to me just now that this is beginning to feel like when labotomies were commonplace and seen as a cure all. Is it just me? I really think there will one day be a reckoning and people will finally wake the hell up.
OP, hugs to you. You’re simply darling and precious, and I hope you realize it.
If this comes across is insensitive, I don’t mean it to be... but is it really that deep? The brain is a tricky thing. When I got married, it took several months for me to give my new last name when asked. If someone asks my age, I never get it right. I always give the wrong answer, have to do the math, then offer the correct one. My husband died a month ago, and I’m still finding myself referring to him in the present tense.
My favorite example, my husband's previous wife died in 2000. Until the day he died, he called me by her name a few times each month. It never bothered me because I get it - it was not a reflection of where his heart was, that’s just how our brains are - they’re assholes!
You definitely don’t look like a male to me. More like hot tomboy. You have a very pretty face. If you wanted a more feminine look, I’d bet long hair would accomplish that. However, the short hair looks good on you.
For what it’s worth, you give off a confident vibe. Maybe fake it til you make it.
Excellent read. For the record, I doubt the stylist will even think twice about your pic being a men's vs women's style. I know I was a teen in the 80s, and I can’t tell you how many girls used a pic of Jon Bon Jovi as a reference pic because his hair was fucking glorious.
I’m not trans, so please excuse me if my advice is offensive. If you feel the need to come up with a reason, maybe just say your mom (or other loved one) sat you down recently and explained you’d been given your birth name because it was a name that meant something to them, and your rejection of that name hurt their heart. You love them enough, and don’t mind your birth name, so you’re going back to it.
That being said, you should be able to simply say you feel like going back to your given name.
Both my parents tried to teach me to drive a stick, to no avail. Finally, my nephew, who had been raised on a farm and often drove tractors, sat me down and did some hand motions showing me how to position the gas and clutch. For some reason, that just clicked and I mastered it that afternoon.