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Reddit user /u/Ok-Praline1180's Detransition Story

Transitioned: 15 -> Detransitioned: 18
male
low self-esteem
internalised homophobia
took hormones
regrets transitioning
escapism
depression
influenced online
puberty discomfort
started as non-binary
anxiety
benefited from non-affirming therapy
This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
On Reddit, people often share their experiences across multiple comments or posts. To make this information more accessible, our AI gathers all of those scattered pieces into a single, easy-to-read summary and timeline. All system prompts are noted on the prompts page.

Sometimes AI can hallucinate or state things that are not true. But generally, the summarised stories are accurate reflections of the original comments by users.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious

Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it's a bot or inauthentic.

The user's perspective is consistent, emotionally charged, and reflects the complex, often angry, reasoning of someone who has personally experienced and rejected a trans identity. The language is nuanced, uses personal anecdotes ("I detransitioned"), and expresses a clear, if harsh, worldview developed from their experience. The passion and stigma mentioned in your prompt are evident and do not seem performative.

About me

I was a boy who felt completely out of place, and at 13, I found online communities that told me I must be transgender. I socially transitioned and started hormones at 17, believing it was the only way to be happy. After a year, the excitement faded and I realized my transition was an escape from depression and not fitting male stereotypes. I'm grateful I never had surgery and that I was able to stop hormones and leave those online spaces. Now, I've moved on from focusing on gender and am finally living my life without those labels.

My detransition story

My whole journey with this started when I was really young, around 13. I was a boy who felt incredibly uncomfortable and out of place. Puberty was a nightmare; I hated the changes happening to my body and I felt a deep, constant anxiety about growing into a man. I didn't feel like I fit in with other boys. I spent a lot of time online, and that's where I first found communities that told me these feelings meant I was probably transgender. It felt like an answer, a way to escape the person I was supposed to become.

By the time I was 15, I was sure I was a girl. I came out as trans to my friends and family and started living as a girl socially. It felt exciting and new at first, like I had finally found a solution to all my problems. At 17, I started taking estrogen hormones. I was convinced this was the path to finally being happy and comfortable in my own skin. I was deep in online trans communities, and everyone there reinforced the idea that medical transition was the only way to be my true self. I didn't really question it; it just felt like the logical next step.

I lived as a trans woman for about a year. But after that year, the excitement wore off and I started to feel… nothing. The whole topic of gender became boring to me. I felt like I had heard every possible argument and story a hundred times over. I realized I had explored everything there was to explore about gender, and for me, the topic was just dead. I lost all interest in reading about trans issues or talking about it anymore. I knew men, I knew women, I knew trans people, and I knew the attention seekers and the confused people. It all started to sound the same.

Looking back, I understand my transition was a form of escapism. I had a lot of depression and low self-esteem, and I thought becoming someone else would fix that. I was also influenced heavily by the online communities I was in; they created an echo chamber where transition was the only valid option. I think a part of it was also internalized issues; I was a feminine boy who didn't fit the male stereotype, and instead of learning to be okay with that, I thought I had to become a girl to be accepted.

I don't regret the experience because I feel like I had to go through it to get to where I am now. I rationalize it by being glad it only took a few years of my youth and I came out the other end intact. I'm able to move on with most of my life still ahead of me. I do feel some shame about it, but I mostly blame the internet and the culture that pushes this one-size-fits-all solution onto confused young people.

I never had any surgeries, which is something I'm very grateful for now. I think if I had gotten surgery, my detransition would have been much harder, both physically and mentally. Because I didn't go that far, some people didn't take my detransition seriously, but that’s okay. My view now is that it's important for people to understand their biology. You are male or female, and there are limits to what transition can change. People get into the most psychological trouble when they believe they can become the opposite sex entirely. That kind of hope sets you up for severe depression when you face reality.

I benefited from just… stepping away from it all. The best therapy for me was non-affirming therapy; it was stopping the hormones, leaving the online communities, and just living my life without constantly thinking about gender. I moved on to other things that actually stimulate me. I know who I am now, and it doesn't have anything to do with labels.

Here is a timeline of my journey:

Age Event
13 Started feeling intense discomfort with male puberty and began searching for answers online.
15 Socially transitioned to living as a girl, influenced by online communities.
17 Started taking estrogen hormones.
18 Began to lose interest in trans identity and community; started detransitioning.

Top Comments by /u/Ok-Praline1180:

5 comments • Posting since January 9, 2022
Reddit user Ok-Praline1180 (detrans male) explains the societal pressures that lead boys to want to transition, arguing that they are punished for femininity while girls are rewarded for it. He discusses the importance of understanding the biological limits of transition to avoid severe depression from unmet expectations, and calls it an impossible situation for a parent to explain these mature concepts to a child.
40 pointsJan 12, 2022
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You are in an impossible situation. So don't be too hard on yourself regardless of how you approach your son.

Clothes and make up do have a "gender". The reality is that things are gendered. Some things are for boys, some are for girls. Just because there are girls who do boy things and vice versa doesn't change the associations for example for dresses.

The problem with telling your son to just wear dresses and be happy being a boy who likes feminine things is that he will find that society rewards girls for being feminine, but does not reward boys for being feminine. This is one of the many reasons the he will want to transition to "be like the other girls".

Unfortunately, the reality is that he is male, so he will never "be like the other girls". I think its important for trans people to understand their biology, that they are male, and that there are many things they cannot change to "be like the girls".

People get into the most psychological trouble when they want to be the opposite sex, and think that modern medicine and everything CAN turn them indistinguishably into the opposite sex. This kind of "hope" leaves one open to severe depression when they realize the limits and hardships of transition. My point is that if trans people understood the limits of transition, maybe they could go into it with eyes wide open, instead of going into it with heads full of delusion and fantasy.

But how can you expect your son to understand such mature concepts? You can't. So you are in an impossible situation. The best you can do is surround him with people that can help him grow into a strong person, not influenced by the online mob.

Reddit user Ok-Praline1180 (detrans male) explains why he finds the topic of gender boring and unstimulating after a year of detransitioning, stating he has heard all the arguments and understands everything about it.
8 pointsJan 9, 2022
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about a year, after that I had no interested in reading trans bullshit anymore or talking about gender. If you want my opinion, I understand everything there is to know about "gender". It is no longer entertaining to me in anyway. I know men, I know women, I know trans people, I know the attention seekers, and the confused people.
When they share their thoughts my first thought is "I have heard this a hundred times... boring".

There is nothing to "explore" regarding gender anymore and for me the topic is dead, I did all my exploring and I am on to other things that stimulate me.

Reddit user Ok-Praline1180 (detrans male) comments that a doctor's assessment of passing is unreliable due to a culture that influences patients and promotes extremist views on care.
8 pointsJan 9, 2022
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Its not her fault. She is being influenced by the culture around her, and trans people that have extremist views on how doctors should be managing trans patients.

How would this doctor even know what it looks like to "pass" or "not pass". Look at all the idiot transgenders on reddit who post pics of themselves and think they pass and are "stealth" when they don't.

I have seen literal ogres claim to be "stealth".

If trans people are so delusional about their ability to "pass" how do we expect doctors to approach the subject?

Reddit user Ok-Praline1180 (detrans male) comments on the lack of publicly open detransitioners, explaining that those without full surgeries are often not taken seriously and that more visibility could challenge the delusions of the MtF community.
6 pointsJan 12, 2022
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Tbh I think it would be helpful if there were more people like you open about this situation. I detransitioned, but because I did not get all the surgeries, people would not take me seriously. If there were more detransitioned MtFs, MtFs would not be so delusional. Then again, males tend to do whatever the fuck they want, especially when it turns them on, so probably wouldn't help.

But I understand not wanting to be public, not really any benefit to you

Reddit user Ok-Praline1180 (detrans male) explains his shame over trying to transition, blaming the internet, but rationalizes he is glad it happened in his youth so he can move on with his life.
3 pointsJan 12, 2022
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Personally, I do feel shame, but I blame it all on internet and shit. Also I rationalize, that it is much better that I went through this in a few years in my youth, and came out the other end in tact.

Reading older people "questioning" their gender and diving into trans bullshit makes me shiver. I am glad that I am able to move on, with so much of my life still ahead of me, so I don't care to much about what I "missed out on". Could always have been worse.