This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user shares detailed, personal experiences with medical transition and detransition, expresses complex emotions, and offers nuanced advice that aligns with a genuine detransitioner or desister perspective.
About me
I started transitioning because I felt my masculinity couldn't exist if I was a woman. Taking testosterone made me look like a teenage boy and caused serious health problems, so I had to stop. I realized my real struggle was learning to accept myself as a masculine woman, not changing my body. Now, I find strength by looking up to other strong, masculine women who are comfortable in their own skin. I've learned that my discomfort was often just a normal part of growing up female in a world with narrow expectations.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started from a really deep insecurity I had about being a woman. I had this kneejerk feeling that being masculine and being female just couldn't go together. I felt like they were mutually exclusive. Because of that, when I started identifying as a trans man, I actually felt a wave of confidence. It was like a relief valve; my masculinity was finally allowed to exist because it wasn't fighting against my identity as a woman anymore. I was on testosterone for a while, but it made me look like a 15-year-old boy when I was actually 21. It never really gave me the results I guess I was hoping for.
I had to go off testosterone in the end because it was causing me too many health problems. Plus, it didn't even change half of the things that caused me dysphoria. That was the real turning point. I was forced to confront the fact that I had to learn to accept being female. The choice became clear: I could either try to force myself to be feminine, which felt wrong, or I could learn to accept my masculinity as a natural part of who I am as a woman.
A lot of my feelings, I’ve realized, were based on anxiety about how other people saw me. I think being female is difficult in a world where our worth and capabilities are often measured by how we fit into or complement male roles. The answer for me wasn't to change my body, but to unlearn those biases and become comfortable with my natural self. It’s a daily practice.
I found it really helpful to cut off media and even reduce time with friends who made me feel insecure in my masculinity. That kind of stuff just worsens dysphoria and sexist biases, and it keeps you longing to be male. What I needed, and what I think a lot of us need, are strong, masculine women to look up to. There weren't any in my family, so I started looking elsewhere—like the old butches I meet at my local bar, or famous lesbian trainers like Gordy Bravo or Morgan Olsen. These are women who want to look rough and strong and are completely comfortable in their female masculinity. It’s been hard to find young women like this who don't transition, which is a shame because that camaraderie is so important.
Looking back, I see that a lot of my struggle was just part of growing up. Being young and frustrated with not being taken seriously, having body image issues, and feeling a general lack of control over your life is common. For a lot of us, transitioning becomes a project, something to pour all that confused energy into. It feels like there must be a big, concrete cause for all the suffering. But a lot of it is just the normal discomfort of going through puberty as a female. Your body changes so drastically and it’s unsettling.
I don’t regret exploring transition because it led me to where I am now, but I definitely see things differently. I understand now that feeling uncomfortable with your body during puberty, or even wanting to change your name and pronouns, doesn't automatically mean you're trans. That's how most detrans people I've talked to started out. For me, accepting myself as a woman and just embracing my masculinity was the only way forward that felt true and sustainable.
Here is a timeline of the main events:
My Age | Event |
---|---|
Teenage Years | Felt intense discomfort during female puberty. Struggled with body image and the sense that my masculinity was incompatible with being female. |
21 | Started taking testosterone. It made me look like a 15-year-old boy and didn't resolve my underlying dysphoria. |
Mid-20s | Stopped testosterone due to serious health complications it caused. This forced me to confront my identity and acceptance of my body. |
Present (Post-Detransition) | Learned to accept myself as a masculine woman. I focus on finding community and unlearning societal biases about gender. |
Top Comments by /u/Overyonder-x64:
I used to be insecure as a woman because masculinity and femaleness felt mutually exclusive. Just as a kneejerk reaction. While a trans man, I felt confident because my masculinity wasn’t at odds with my identity. Had to go off T and thus accept being female, it was either learn to be feminine or accept my masculinity.
Your feelings are based on anxieties of how others perceive you. Being female is difficult because our capabilities are measured by how they complement male societal roles. The answer is to unlearn biases and become comfortable with your natural self.
Cut off any sources of media/reduce time with friends that make you feel insecure in your masculinity. It will worsen dysphoria and sexist biases and keep you longing to be male.
We as masculine women need strong, masculine women to look up to. There are none in my family, so I look to people like the old butches I meet at my local bar. Or famous lesbian trainers like Gordy Bravo or Morgan Olsen. Who want to look rough and strong and are comfortable in their female masculinity.
It’s difficult to find young, truly masculine women who don’t transition, unfortunately, since this type of camaraderie is important for us. I have had some success meeting them online. Thinking of starting a discord server or something.
I understand. Test made me look like a 15 yo boy when I was 21. It was impossible from the start but I wasn’t able to accept it until years later. I am off of test now because it causes too many health problems and doesn’t change half of what causes me dysphoria. Accepting myself as a woman and just embracing my masculinity was the only way.
We’ve all been there. Young and frustrated with not being taken seriously, having body image issues, a lack of control over your life in general. To many people, transitioning is something to spend energy on, perhaps it feels like there must be a cause for all your suffering. It sucks to go through this.
Just want you to know, it is normal to be uncomfortable with your body as it changes drastically during puberty. Feeling the need to lose weight is unfortunately common in young women also. I don’t know much about eating disorders. But perhaps joining a sport would help improve your mental health and learn how to care for and strengthen your body.
Not gonna lie, your backstory isn’t unique to trans people, it shares many similarities with butch women growing into their masculinity. Even liking a male name and pronouns doesn’t mean you’re trans necessarily, that’s how most all detrans people started out.
If you weren’t noticeably dysphoric or dissociated from your body simply because you were going through female puberty, there’s not really a good way to be sure. Just do what you want man, it sounds like you’ve already decided.