This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The user demonstrates:
- A consistent, nuanced, and passionate perspective across multiple topics (gender and autism).
- Personal, lived-experience insights, particularly in the autism comments, that read as genuine frustration ("Because as one of those people its pretty insulting...").
- Complex argumentation and the ability to engage with counterpoints, which is atypical for simple bots.
The passion and anger present are consistent with a genuine detransitioner or desister who feels harmed by their experiences.
About me
I'm a female who started identifying as non-binary at 19 because I hated the social pressures placed on women and thought being a man would be easier. I was later pushed towards medical transition and took testosterone at 21, followed by top surgery at 22. I realized changing my body didn't fix my underlying issues with autism, anxiety, and low self-esteem, so I stopped testosterone at 23. I now see my discomfort was with sexism and stereotypes, not my body itself. I'm learning to accept myself as a female who doesn't fit the mold and am finally dealing with my mental health directly.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started from a place of deep discomfort, but not necessarily with my body itself. I was born female, and from a young age, I hated the expectations that came with that. I saw how women were treated and the pressure they were under to be a certain way. I remember thinking that being a man seemed easier, like it was a privilege to escape all that. I didn't want to be seen as a lesbian just because I liked video games and didn't wear makeup. I felt like I was failing at being a girl.
A lot of this was tangled up with my autism, which I was diagnosed with as an adult. For me, autism isn't just a different way of thinking; it's a real disability. It causes me intense anxiety, obsessive thoughts, and a lot of trouble dealing with change. I think I latched onto the idea of being transgender because it gave me a clear, new identity and a set of rules to follow. It felt like an escape from the confusing and overwhelming demands of being a woman, which my autistic brain already struggled to navigate. It was a solution to the social problems I faced.
I started identifying as non-binary first, around the age of 19, because it felt like a comfortable middle ground. But online spaces and some friends I had at the time pushed me towards a more concrete, medical transition. They made it seem like taking testosterone and getting surgery was the only way to be truly valid. I started testosterone when I was 21 and had top surgery a year later, at 22.
For a while, I felt a sense of relief. I was being seen as not-female, and that eased some of the social pressure. But the underlying problems—my autism, my anxiety, my low self-esteem—didn't go away. I started to realize that changing my body hadn't fixed what was really going on in my head. I began to critically think about why I transitioned in the first place. I re-read my own old comments, the ones where I talked about the pressures on women, and it hit me: I hadn't been born in the wrong body; I just hated the box society put me in because I was female.
I stopped testosterone after about two years, when I was 23. I don't regret my transition in the sense that I needed to go through it to get to where I am now. It was a necessary part of my journey to understanding myself. But I do have regrets about the permanent changes, like my deepened voice and the fact that I am now infertile. I regret that I wasn't encouraged to explore my discomfort with gender roles or my internalized issues before making irreversible decisions. I think if I had had therapy that addressed my autism and my self-esteem instead of just affirming my gender, I might not have transitioned at all.
Now, I see gender as largely a social construct. I believe my discomfort was with sexism and stereotypes, not with my sexed body. I'm learning to accept myself as a female who doesn't fit the mold, and that's okay. My detransition has been about accepting my body for what it is and dealing with my mental health challenges directly, instead of trying to escape them.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 19 | Started identifying as non-binary. |
| 21 | Started taking testosterone. |
| 22 | Had top surgery (double mastectomy). |
| 23 | Stopped testosterone and began detransition. |
Top Comments by /u/Petersen18:
Tribal people don't get diagnosed with autism, yeah, do you not think their lack of knowledge in regards to autism and access to healthcare has something to do with that? Poverty in general makes getting an autism diagnosis less likely, whatever a person's cultural origins. Despite that autism does get diagnosed in native Americans. I've read about autism in native American culture, they are more tolerant about such things, especially in regards to more severe autism. They have some very interesting views.
I don't get this whole autism isn't disabling, my surroundings are argument. You find your surroundings disabling because you have autism, ergo the autism is disabling you. And the disabling aspects of autism aren't just about your surroundings and sensory issues, the stuff in your head can be disabling all on it's own. The anxiety, obsessive thinking, inability to deal with unexpected events and changes. Why do people always focus on sensory stuff? Like if the world was more autism friendly then it magically wouldn't be a disability anymore? And how would the world be autism friendly for all of us, given that so many autistic people have different needs?
If it's not a disorder why do we bother diagnosing it? Why can people get disability for it? It's a disorder because an autistic person's development is different to an NT person, disordered just means out of order. Which is a pretty apt description really.
To all those of you who autism isn't a disorder and is only disabling because of your surroundings, what would you say to an autistic person who can't work or live independently because of their autism? And before anyone plays the "i wasn't talking about low functioning autism" card, i mean those "high functioning" adults who are hugely affected by their autism but don't have a learning disability. Because as one of those people its pretty insulting to read the "oh, its not a disorder" and all that stuff.
Yeah but people aren't only disabled due to their environment, so why focus on that? People are disabled by the fact they have a neurological disorder which affects the way their brain works. And not all "high functioning" autistic people are able to take care of themselves. Not all autistic people are "thriving in our tech dominated" world. Perpetuating stereotypes that all autistic people are good with tech stuff is not helpful.
Why do you think autism isn't a disorder for "high functioning" people? Being high functioning means a person has an IQ over 70 and you had no significant speech delay. It doesn't mean you aren't severely affected by autism, or that you're a super smart articulate genius who's just a bit quirky. It doesn't mean you can take care of yourself or function in everyday life. People can be severely affected and be verbal. Equally people can be severely autistic, non-verbal and be more capable in everyday life than a verbal person. It's really not helpful to paint autism as two extreme ends of the spectrum that way. It's not a line from "mildly affected and high functioning" to severe low functioning autism at the other end. It's way more complex than that.
But how do you know that unless you actually were female? And girls don't have it any easier in regards to the pressure to conform to gender norms. Ask any woman who doesn't wear makeup, isn't into "girly stuff" and likes things that are more associated with males - like football and video games. They'd tell you there's a huge amount of pressure on women, and there's even more on those who don't conform to gender stereotypes. Dress in a "male" way and you'll have both men and women assuming you're a lesbian.
But yeah sure, being a woman is easy. I mean you get paid less, discriminated against at work if you dare get pregnant, have to deal with the everyday sexism and harrassment that is endemic in society. What a fucking joke. Not to mention medical professionals not taking you seriously because you're a woman, dismissing you as "hysterical" and being ignored in childbirth when asking for pain relief.
You're kidding right? We live in a world in which people in certain countries abandon newborn baby girls because they only want sons, where people have abortions for that very same reason. Of course it's a privilege to be born male. Boys don't have to worry about being forced into marrying a man old enough to be their grandfather and dying in childbirth because they were raped by said older man.