This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic.
The comments display a consistent, nuanced, and personal narrative about detransitioning, therapy, and leaving LGBT spaces. The user shares specific details (e.g., having BPD, being an effeminate man, a catalyst therapist at age 17-18) that build a credible personal history. The passion and criticism align with the expected viewpoint of a genuine desister/detransitioner.
About me
I was a sensitive teenager who never fit the masculine stereotype, and a therapist wrongly convinced me my confusion meant I was a woman. I got swept up in online communities that encouraged me to transition, but it never felt right. I realized I was just an effeminate man struggling with internalized homophobia and a personality disorder. With proper therapy, I worked through my real issues and found self-acceptance. I'm now happily living as a detransitioned man, embracing my true self without labels.
My detransition story
My whole journey with this started when I was really struggling as a teenager. I was a sensitive guy with effeminate mannerisms, and I never really fit in with the typical idea of what a man should be. I was raised by women, so I think that influenced how I acted. I didn't have a problem with that, but I felt a lot of pressure from the outside.
When I was around 17 or 18, I started seeing a therapist for what I now know were issues related to Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I was having a lot of identity crises, but they weren't about my gender. I was just confused about who I was in general. But my therapist at the time kept pushing me towards the idea that my discomfort meant I was actually a woman. It felt like she was grooming me into it, like she had an answer she wanted me to have. I wish I had never gone to her because she was the catalyst for me starting to think I should transition.
I started to believe that maybe being trans was the solution to all my problems. I got involved in online LGBT spaces, and while they seemed supportive at first, it felt like a hug-box. Everyone was telling me I was valid, but it also felt like a vicious black hole of self-loathing wrapped in a pretty bow. The ideology was comforting because it gave me a simple answer. It removed the difficulty of having to figure out my own individual morals and who I was. I started to socially transition for a short time, but it never felt right deep down.
The turning point was when I decided to stop participating in those spaces. I felt so much better about myself almost immediately. It was like a weight was lifted. I realized I was just an effeminate man, and that was okay. I didn't want to be a woman. I'm a bisexual man, and I think a lot of my confusion was related to internalized homophobia and not fitting a masculine stereotype.
I switched to a new therapist who was much better. We worked together for a year and a half using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), guided meditations, and other techniques. That therapy did wonders for my sense of self. I had to stress to her that my identity crises were not gender-related, and she listened. She helped me work through my BPD and my low self-esteem. I've recovered now, and I feel much more stable.
Looking back, I see how powerful the groupthink was. Those online communities and that first therapist will pretend to be the most supportive people in the world, but the second you have a different opinion or decide you aren't trans, you're dead to them. They lash out because your decision threatens their entire belief system. A lot is riding on them being "right."
I don't regret exploring my identity because it led me to where I am now, but I deeply regret that I was pushed in that direction by a mental health professional when what I really needed was help for my underlying personality disorder. I never took hormones or had any surgeries, so I avoided those physical consequences. My main regret is the time I lost being confused because of bad therapy.
Now, I've just embraced my experience. I've found more genuine support from non-LGBT communities than I ever did in those spaces. I've also reconnected with religion, specifically Christianity, which has been a positive force for me. It's normal to want to cut out the people from that time in your life—the enablers and the "egg_irl" types. I'm much happier now, living as a feminine man.
Here is a timeline of the main events:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 17-18 | Saw a therapist who pushed me to believe my identity issues were gender-related, leading me to consider transition. |
| 18 | Briefly socially transitioned and was involved in online LGBT spaces. |
| 18 | Stopped participating in LGBT spaces and began to feel much better. |
| 18-19.5 | Switched to a new therapist and underwent successful CBT for BPD and low self-esteem. |
| Present | Living happily as a detransitioned, effeminate, bisexual man. |
Top Comments by /u/ScryForHelp:
To be fair everyone who isnt left of mao is alt right to those types. She may have simply reconnected with her Christian father and started going to church. Oh the horror!
Its pretty normal to want to cut out all those people from that time in your life. The enablers, the "egg_irl" types.
The reason ideology is so powerful is because it is comforting. It removes the difficulties of having to weigh your individual morals in a nuanced way and have your own personal code in your day to day life.
Now when anything threatens to force them to break out of their ideology and think about things for themselves it threatens their entire belief system and because they have likely made many serious decisions by now based on that belief, so a lot is riding on it being "right" to them- they will lash out at you.
Its why they will turn on you so quickly as soon as you go against the grain, even if they were your "biggest supporter" 30 seconds before you told them you were detransitioning.
As a bisexual man with effeminate, but not flamboyant mannerisms I felt like I was pressured in the same way, and even by a therapist who I wish I had never gone to and was the catalyst for my initial transition. This was before the whole "egg culture" thing, too. I think this behavior has been around the whole time but is now much easier with social media as well as other current cultural and social trends...
I've just embraced my experience and have found more support from non-lgbt communities than anywhere else. I feel like I was being groomed into it by my therapist when I was around 17 or 18. Long story, but after I stopped participating in LGBT spaces I began to feel so much better about myself. It's like a vicious black hole of self-loathing wrapped in a pretty bow. A hug-box of faux moral support where "everyone is valid" and everyone is mentally fucking ill. They will pretend to be the most supportive groups in the world until you go against the grain, have a different opinion, or decide you aren't trans, then you're dead to them.
Im a male with BPD, well, recovered, actually. CBT helped me tremendously, but throughout a few months of weekly therapy, I had to stress every time that having a crisis of "identity" isn't a gender identity crisis. Im an effeminate man, I have effeminate mannerisms, but I was raised by women. I didn't want to be a woman. My therapist kept pushing in that direction, allllll the time. I eventually had to switch and found someone much better and spent a year and a half working through CBT, guided meditations, and other stuff which did wonders for my sense of self.
There's a secret problem in the mental health industry that not enough people know about.