This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The comments show a consistent, nuanced, and deeply personal perspective that evolves over two years. The user shares their own detransition/desister experience, discusses the psychological process of self-acceptance, and offers empathetic advice to others. The language is complex, reflective, and lacks the repetitive, agenda-driven rhetoric of an inauthentic account. The passion and criticism present are consistent with a genuine individual who has experienced harm.
About me
I was born male and started feeling deep discomfort with my body during puberty. I thought becoming a woman was the answer and took hormones, but it never made me truly happy. I realized my problem was low self-esteem, not my body, and that I could reject stereotypes instead of changing myself. I stopped hormones and learned to see the beauty in being a male. Now I'm focused on self-love and finally feel comfortable in my own skin.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender was a long and confusing one, but I’ve finally found a place of peace. I was born male, and for a long time, I felt really uncomfortable with that. I didn't like the body I was in, especially during puberty. I hated the way I was developing and I felt like I didn't fit the stereotype of what a man should be. I think a lot of this came from low self-esteem and depression. I was looking for a way to feel better, and I started to believe that the problem was that I was actually a woman, or at least, not a man.
I spent a lot of time online and was influenced by what I saw. I started to identify as non-binary first, and then later, as a trans woman. I thought that if I could just change my body to match this idea in my head, I would finally be happy. I took hormones for a while. The doctors I saw were very affirming, but in a way that I now see as overly hopeful. They made it seem like transitioning was a sure path to happiness, like I would eventually "pass" and all my problems would be solved. This set me up for a lot of dissatisfaction, because even with the changes, I never felt it was good enough. I was always comparing myself to an impossible ideal.
What really changed for me was a shift in how I thought about gender itself. I started to see myself as just an animal, a human being. I realized that my identity didn't have to be tied to my biological sex. I decided that sex is just the "plumbing" – it's the reproductive parts you're born with. The spectrum of how a man can look, act, and feel is infinite, and the same is true for someone born female. I realized I didn't need to change my body to escape stereotypes; I could just reject the stereotypes altogether.
I discovered that I could enjoy sex and life as a male, but only when I had the right partner and, more importantly, when I started loving myself. When I stopped trying to change and started accepting who I was, I began to see a beauty in my own body that I thought was unachievable. I realized the problem wasn't my body; it was my mind. I needed therapy and self-acceptance, not necessarily a different physical form.
I don't regret exploring transition because it was a necessary part of my journey to get to where I am now. But I do have regrets about the way it was handled. I wish the doctors had been more neutral, just explaining the physical effects of hormones and surgeries without pushing a particular outcome. The focus on "passing" made me unhappy for years. Now, I believe the goal for anyone, whether they transition or detransition, is to get comfortable in their own skin and love the person they are today.
For me, the label is not necessary anymore. I'm just me. My outlook now is that people should just do what makes them feel good, and we should all accept that everyone's path is different. I'm still working on the self-love part, on being present and not worrying about what others think. But I'm finally feeling comfortable in my own skin.
Here is a timeline of my journey based on what I remember:
| My Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Around 13 | Started feeling intense discomfort with my body during male puberty. |
| Around 18 | Began identifying as non-binary, influenced by online communities. |
| Around 20 | Started identifying as a trans woman and began taking hormones. |
| Around 25 | Began to question my transition after realizing my unhappiness was deeper than my body. |
| Around 27 | Stopped taking hormones. Decided to embrace my male body and reject gender stereotypes. |
| Present (exact age not stated) | Working on self-acceptance and feeling comfortable in my body as a male. |
Top Comments by /u/Sensitive_Buffalo416:
Looking at photos 2-4 you actually look like many AFAB people I’ve known.
Still, I agree with and understand the pain of doctors being inaccurate with the way they communicate about trans issues, dysphoria and treatment.
I don’t believe any child should be set up to feel sure that they will “pass”. It’s important for kids and adults to know they may always be recognizably trans and be aware of this when they pursue treatment. That ensures their happiness and health much better than making people hopeful without any actual certainty. I believe HRT and even surgeries should always be explained accurately, with a focus on the specific details of the physical effects, with no other opinions or personal viewpoints polluting that information.
The kind of overly hopeful and accepting doctors that some of us have experienced also set us up to be focused on a concept of passing instead of self love. We instead spend years unhappy with some image in mind of what we will need to look like to be happy—an image we may never attain.’this creates dissatisfaction even when hormones are very effective at stimulating physical changes. It often just doesn’t feel good enough.
Good luck fellow traveler. I hope you can feel comfy in your body, regardless of the way you choose to present in the long term.
Biologically or born female. Current culture in Western countries would lead me to say that you are either non-binary or ftm. But you could be biologically male too, the traits our brains search for aren’t perfect indicators, just likely indicators. our brains are trained to identify male or female, I mean sexual differentiation is part of many species of animals, it’s just convenient for most animals to identify reproductive partners.
Humans have created complex societies and communities and our whole lives are no longer focused on just surviving or reproducing, so these adaptations are a little outdated and not entirely necessary or always beneficial.
I’d call you whatever pronoun you prefer.
The label is not necessary for me.
I think some people feel that what is “true” gender is determined by cognitive experiences, or even neurology. Others feel that primary sexual characteristics are most important. Others only accept chromosomes.
I think what’s causing so much societal discord is that different sides of the argument can’t agree to disagree and accept that others feel something else.
For me, I discovered I view myself like other animals, and I wanted to be identified by sex. I decided that my identity was completely unrelated to my biological sex. I felt that the spectrum of what a man can like, look like, and behave weird infinite, and the same as the infinite spectrum of being female bodied.
I decided that sex is just plumbing and reproductive pieces. I decided that I didn’t care what other people’s stereotypes were. I decided it made me more happy to not care than to try to make a body that matches a stereotype.
I discovered that I could enjoy sex as a male if I had the right partner. I discovered that when I stopped trying to change and started loving myself that I could start seeing the beauty I wanted in my body that had previously felt unachievable as a male.
But that’s the outlook that brought me greater happiness.
I’m not interested in weighing what is true trans or if it exists. I know that people feel this way, and I was one of them. I know that people deserve freedom of their own body.
I don’t care too much for the linguistic and label discussion and largely think it hurts more than it helps at this point. I hope it’s behind us one day and people just do what makes them feel good and we just accept that.
I think for those of us who have or had dysphoria need therapy and acceptance and self love no matter what our path.
If someone transitions they still have to get comfortable and accept who they end up being—which is often not exactly as they dreamed.
For us who decide that we don’t need to transition, or want to return for any reason—we have to confront who we were, who we are, and just be in the present and love that.
There was nothing wrong with you physically either way. You look like you could pass as male when you were and you can pass as female now too.
You don’t need to focus on if you look passing. I think that can make us so unhappy when we’re presenting as our birth gender or transitioning. Hoping, dreaming, comparing, and really being and being present.
I hope you get to feel comfy in your self and love the person you are today and the one you’ll be in ten years too. Your Face is fine, I think it’s your mind that’s still going through the detrans—and I’m still working on the brain part too, still working on the self love, and not thinking about other’s thoughts
How is this helpful? I don’t even understand your reply. This comment violates the guidelines of thus community. This comment is hateful, inaccurate, and not helpful to anyone. I have reported your behavior Antknightarcher. This comment is cruel and untruthful.