This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or inauthentic. The user shares specific, personal anecdotes about their transition, detransition, and current life (e.g., interactions with their wife, specific details about makeup and glasses) that are consistent and lack the generic, repetitive patterns typical of bots or trolls. The passion and personal focus on appearance are understandable for someone in the detrans/desister community.
About me
I'm a woman who started transitioning because I felt uncomfortable with the strict feminine expectations placed on me, especially by an ex who forced me to wear heavy makeup. I tried to become masculine by changing my appearance with glasses and testosterone, thinking that was the only way to escape. A conversation with my wife was a turning point, helping me see I was still following those old, oppressive rules. I've stopped the heavy makeup and am now learning to present myself in a way that feels truly authentic. I'm finally defining womanhood on my own terms without feeling I need to change my body.
My detransition story
Looking back at my whole journey, it's complicated. I think a lot of my feelings about being a woman started from a place of discomfort, especially with how I was expected to look and act. I never felt like I was good at being a girl. I had an ex who made me wear really heavy makeup, and I never learned any other way to do it. It felt like a mask I had to put on. I think I confused that feeling of not liking the performance of femininity with not being a woman at all.
When I started socially transitioning, I went all in on trying to look masculine. I even bought these very masculine, heavy-framed glasses right after I came out because I thought they would help me pass. I was trying to control how people saw me. I also started testosterone. Looking at pictures now, I see that my actual face structure didn't change much from the testosterone, just some facial hair and I lost some weight.
A big turning point for me was recently, when I was talking to my wife about my makeup. I was still doing that heavy style out of habit, and she pointed out that I didn't need to do that anymore. She said I could wear less or no makeup if I wanted, and that the heavy makeup was actually making me look more masculine in a way that was similar to how some trans women do their makeup early on. That was a real lightbulb moment for me. I realized I was still following these old rules that weren't even mine.
I washed all the makeup off except for some stubborn waterproof mascara, and it felt strange but good not to have that mask on. I’m now trying to learn a much simpler style, maybe just foundation and mascara. I’m also waiting for new glasses to arrive that are rounder and have half-rims, which soften my face instead of hiding it. It feels like I'm finally figuring out how to present as me, not as what I think a man should look like or what an ex forced me to look like.
I don't think I fully understood the role that past relationships and low self-esteem played in my transition. I was trying to escape from a version of womanhood that felt oppressive. Now, I'm realizing that I can define what being a woman means for me, without having to change my body or my pronouns. I don't regret my journey because it led me to my wife and it's brought me to this point of understanding myself better, but if I had known then what I know now about my own motivations, I might have made different choices.
Here is a timeline of the main events I can remember:
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| Early 20s | Was in a relationship where I was made to wear heavy makeup. Felt uncomfortable with feminine expectations. |
| Mid-20s | Came out as transgender and began social transition. Bought very masculine glasses to appear more male. |
| Mid-20s | Started taking testosterone. |
| Now (Late 20s?) | Realized my transition was influenced by past trauma and a narrow view of gender. Stopped heavy makeup, ordered softer glasses, and began exploring a more authentic feminine presentation. |
Top Comments by /u/SingleBodyRiot:
I soooo appreciate the bluntness! My mil just laid on compliments so it left me quite confused. I showed my wife this comment (shes right next to me) and she says yep thats what it was, its similar to mtf makeup, she did her make up just like mine when she transitioned.she was just half asleep and couldn't find the words.
I for sure want to get lessons i like make up but im tempted to wash it off now and try something lighter like just foundation and mascara thats it.
My hair isnt usually this frizzy , its normally very silky soft and wavy/manageable.
I made the mistake of braiding it before bed into many braids in an attempt to make more waves. The braids were to small, and i stupidly brushed them instead of combed. So it went poof.
https://imgur.com/gallery/ojsKHy8
I took it all off except the remnants of the waterproof mascara that wouldn't budge.
Im going ro take those tips and write them down along with so much internet searching for make up styles that match well. I do like not feeling like im wearing a literal mask of makeup
Ive always had this facial structure. So im not sure how to take that. Ive compared pics pre testosterone and now and my face didn't change except for facial hair and weight loss.
Make ups plain cause my wife has little make up to choose from so i had to work with what i had on top of not really knowing what i was doing.
I have a pair coming in a couple weeks that are rounder and only half rim they softened my eyes up a ton and dont hide them as much. To be fair these glasses were ones i got just after i came out socially, im not surprised they read masculine when i bought them that was my intention.
Im going to tone down the make up and look into subreddits for makeup.
Not solid on them at all. I bought these shortly after i came out as trans to make myself look more masculine, i had a more feminine pair but i accidentally broke them so i have to wait for the rounder half rim thin metal ones to come in a couple weeks.
If i didn't need them id ditch em till the new ones came, my alternate masculine pair is even worse(i bought two that day) to the point i wont even wear them lol
I appreciate the honesty, i always wore heavy makeup pre transition i never learned how to lessen it(my ex made me wear heavy make up so i nevwr bothered to learn anything else)
Im going to look up some guides and just stick to mascara and foundation and thats it.
My wife said something similar when she woke up, and i asked her. She says ahe loves me but i dont NEED to do what i did for my ex i can wear less or no make up if i want to. And agrees it makes me appear more masculine in her honest opinion.
This was the only way i was used to doing it.