Not only that but because women are more socially sensitive, they follow social trends more, which is why there are more anorexic women than men. Same thing for trans. Of course not all women follow the trans social trend. A lot of women do genuinely want to transition. But think about it from a teenager perspective. You are a social outcast, not a part of any group, and you're sort of a tomboy. Someone tells you maybe you're trans and this group starts accepting you. You are then showered with support and affirmation to transition. You finally get what you've been wanting and transition is the key to get it.

If you keep leaning more into transitioning and you only feel worse about it, why do you think top surgery will make you feel better? Idk your past and your decisions but for example let's say first you change your pronouns. You change your pronouns but you still feel it's not enough. Then you present as male. But you feel worse. Then you start taking harmones and you feel worse. Why would top surgery make you feel better? Top surgery is far more damaging than harmones or changing your pronouns and it's a decision that should be taken very carefully and cautiously.

I suggest you look at posts on here about people who went through top surgery and how they feel about it years later.

Its because social justice is not about facts. It's about power and control. Why do they want children on puberty blockers? They will tell the children and the parents it makes them feel good and their life will be better. Meanwhile, these children are now reliant on the medical system and are effectively a cash cow for hospitals and clinics. Then when someone comes along and shows puberty blockers are bad for them, they will be told that these people hate them and they will take away what makes them feel good.

I can't give you the perspective you are looking for but I just want to commend you for being a caring father. I don't have children myself but one day I want to. It must be difficult to hear from your wife and doctor's that either your son becomes your daughter or else your son will commit suicide. They wanted to turn your son into a cash cow. A forever patient enslaved to the medical system. Even though damage was done, you pulled your son out of it and are helping him to reverse the damage as much as you can. As a stranger on the internet I can't do anything for you but I will be praying for you and your son to reverse this as much as possible and that your son may feel comfortable with who he his and his body.

They keep calling us transphobe, but like you said they're the ones who are afraid. Detrans goes against the narrative and they are scared it will cause that narrative to fall apart. It's of course ok for people to be trans, but what's happening is not an ask of acceptance. It's about control and power.

The wisest people are those who can admit they were wrong. What you are doing is not easy. People will go to great lengths to not admit making a mistake. They will lie, cheat, gaslight, and more. They would rather change the whole world rather than to admit they were wrong. But what you did is suck up your pride and made the right choice to admit a mistake. Don't feel embarrassed because you made a mistake. Because many people can't do what you just did.

Admitting your mistakes is just step one. Step two is what you will do to fix your mistake. If you can figure that out, you will be just fine.

Also. Idk your relationship with your family but I'm sure they would be relieved to know what you are going through.

About the wife/girlfriend stuff. There are a lot of douchebags out there who will treat you like that. But there are also a lot of decent men who won't and will treat you properly. Take your time and find them if that's something you really want.

YOUR BODY IS PRECIOUS. Do not make a decision to please other people. Especially something like this. "I'm afraid to upset". If someone won't accept you because you didn't do a top surgery then they are not worth keeping around. I'm not saying this is what your circle of friends and family is doing but what I'm trying to say is, don't let other people influence such a body altering decision such as this. Your body is precious and you need to seriously think about how this will affect you. Like others said. Take some time to think about it. Yes you've been asking for it 4 years but I suggest to take some time and don't think what others think about you. Think about how this will affect YOU and no one else.

The medical system greatly benefits from people going trans. Every trans person becomes bound to the medical system once they start to transition. Hormones, surgeries, therapy, etc. Once a person transitions, their entire life relies on the medical system. They become a guaranteed regular patient and a cash cow for whatever hospital/clinic they go to. Trans is incredibly profitable for the medical system. Think about it... Who tells someone to/prescribes going trans? Doctors/therapists do.

Thank you for sharing. I also get in my head when something goes bad and I usually feally feel better when I touch grass and get out of the house. It's easy for us to get into our own heads. Stay away from the social media nonsense and keep fighting!

I think that's a normal question to ask. I doubt it's because they suspect you of being detrans. I ask my male friends that same question. I've had a friend who's had really long curly hair for years and all of a sudden he decided to cut it and I asked him why did you cut it? Basically the opposite of what people are asking you. It's normal for guys to have long hair. If someone suspects you of being detrans and to them that's a negative thing, then that's on them, not on you. You are who you are and if someone else can't accept that then it's not your fault.