This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The comments display a consistent, nuanced, and emotionally complex personal narrative. The user shares specific, non-clichéd details about their life (e.g., powerlifting history, cosplaying, breast development, relationship dynamics) that would be unusual for a bot to fabricate coherently. The internal conflict, self-doubt, and emotional reasoning are hallmarks of a genuine person grappling with a difficult experience. The account's activity over a 10-month period also supports authenticity.
About me
I was born male and felt a lot of pressure to be a certain kind of man, which led me to powerlifting and later to using cosplay as an escape. I transitioned at 19, thinking it was the answer to my insecurities and jealousy of fictional characters. The most difficult part has been losing the physical strength I worked so hard for, which I wasn't fully prepared to lose. Now, I feel stuck because I have developed feminine features I'm attached to, but I worry my reasons for transitioning were more about escapism than my true self. I have regrets and am trying to figure out who I really am without the pressure to be anyone else.
My detransition story
My journey with transition started when I was really young, but it didn't feel like a gender thing at first. I was born male and from a young age, I felt a lot of pressure to be a certain kind of man. My parents even put me in powerlifting because they thought it would make me more manly. I was small and skinny, but I actually enjoyed it and did pretty well in competitions.
A big part of my life was anime and cosplay. I got super obsessed with perfecting my cosplays of female characters. It felt like an art form to me, and I was really good at the makeup and presentation. Over time, that hobby became a gateway. I started feeling jealous of the confident, purposeful male characters I saw, but I felt like I could never be that guy. I think I was comparing myself to an impossible ideal and feeling like I failed at being a man. Cosplaying female characters felt like an escape from that pressure. It wasn't a classic case of gender dysphoria for me; it was more about escapism and low self-esteem.
I began my social transition around 19, and a year later, at 20, I started taking estrogen. I knew the physical changes would happen, including losing strength, and I thought I was prepared for it. But losing my physical strength has been one of the hardest parts of this. Even though I was skinny, I was strong. Now, my body feels a lot weaker, and that's been a real source of discomfort for me. I sometimes wish I could be both physically strong and feminine, but it feels impossible with my hormone levels now.
I also have complicated feelings about my body now. I've had good breast development from the hormones, and a part of me finds them beautiful. I feel attached to them because so much patience went into growing them. But sometimes I get the urge to detransition, and the only thing that stops me is these breasts. I feel like I’d be letting down my trans friends, who literally idolize me and say they wish they had my results. My girlfriend is also more attracted to my feminine features, like my breasts, and I don't think she sees me as a man or that we'd be dating if I didn't pass. I worry that if I detransitioned, she would pretend to be okay but would be upset inside.
Looking back, I don't think my reasons for transitioning were rooted in a true sense of gender identity. It was more about my own insecurities, jealousy of a fictional ideal, and using cosplay as a form of escapism. I don't really blame society for it; it was my own obsession that I took to an extreme. I don't even cosplay as much anymore, which makes the whole thing feel strange.
I do have some regrets, mainly about losing my physical strength and perhaps not understanding my own motivations better before making such permanent changes. My thoughts on gender now are that it's a very personal and complicated thing, and for some people, like me, the reasons for wanting to transition can be tangled up with other issues like low self-esteem and a desire to escape from who you are.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
My Age | Event |
---|---|
Young Teen | Felt parental pressure to be "manly"; began powerlifting. |
Throughout Teens | Became deeply involved in anime and cosplay, primarily female characters. |
19 | Began social transition. |
20 | Started taking estrogen hormones. |
22 (Now) | Currently living as a woman, experiencing significant strength loss and conflicted feelings about my body and my path. |
Top Comments by /u/ThatDudeXxx:
From what I can gather, there are more cases of females transitioning to males because of external factors such as childhood abuse and childhood trauma. They do not want to be sexualised anymore and this is their way of coping with their trauma. This isn’t the “correct” reason to transition and it’s no surprise many detransition when they realise making these changes had no effect. I feel like issues of over sexualisation and abuse occur more to females than to males. So there will be more females that detransition.
Men really don’t care about having the most beautiful woman in the world. If that’s the case won’t everyone just leave their current partner at some point when someone more beautiful comes along? This doesn’t happen in the real world. In the real world people form relationships based on more things than physical attraction. Especially as you get older you will realise it more and more, looks matter less and less in relationships and people focus more on talents and compatibility. It seems like you have found someone where you are both compatible for each other so good job :)). This is all that really matters
I understand how you feel, you messed up because of your lack of confidence and feeling like you are not a man because of bad experiences dating. This means that you compared yourself to this ideal expectation of what you think a man is, even tho there is no such as expectation. Similarly now you are comparing yourself to others that did not make the same mistake as you. How about you compare yourself to you instead? Look how much progress you’ve made and how far you have come. You have realised your flaws and sought help which is something that not many people can do!
This question depends a lot upon what country you are in. In my experience this is hard because therapists go by the “research” and the only theories we have to combat gender dysphoria is going along with it. It’s not their fault, they perceive themselves as non bias, they have to pursue this path. On the other side you might come across some religious therapists that might try to convert to which would probably help even less.
See your urges are logical and make sense. Where as for me it’s when I watch anime and I see a cool guy I get sad and think wow I’m never gonna become that guy. Where as before when I was a guy I would feel like I could. It feels like I’m jealous of guys that are confident in themselves and with a purpose. Maybe because it’s felt like I’ve never had a purpose or anything as a guy. Idk how to explain these urges that I randomly get :(
I think out of everyone you have understood me the most, and for that I am really grateful. I still don’t understand why I feel this jealousy towards anime guys in general. Idk if it’s because their lives seem more interesting, maybes it’s because they seem to happy with who they are despite being effeminate which is something I failed to do :/. And you are right I think I do want to be more protective.
I already do work out and did prior to transition. Despite being quite small and skinny, my parents tried to train me in powerlifting because they thought I needed to be more manly. Even so I enjoyed the training and was relatively strong and even entered a few powerlifting competitions for the lower weight class and placed highly in a few. Now I do feel a lot weaker since it’s been 2 years on estrogen. I knew this would happen and I thought i was prepared and I feel bad that I feel bad about my transition just because of strength loss.
I wish I could be physically strong and feminine but my testosterone levels are so low now and I literally lost so much strength. I didn’t lose much muscles I was already quite skinny but my body feels ALOT weaker.
I feel bad about feeling bad about my transition because many of my trans friends literally idolise me and I will let them down if I detrans. They say stuff like they wish they discovered they were trans at my age and they love that I have had good breast development. I sometimes get the urge to detrans and the only thing stopping me is these breasts because I feel attached to them and think they are really beautiful and it’s felt like so much patience has went into them.
I don’t really want to blame society for this. Society didn’t tell me to transition I just got super obsessed with cosplaying female characters and perfecting the art. I feel super pleased now when I cosplay and my body looks more like the character I’m cosplaying because makeup alone only took me so far :/. I just feel like I took the art to the extreme and I don’t even cosplay as much anymore. It’s kind of weird it’s like cosplaying was a gateway for me to transition. Not at all like gender dysphoria other trans individuals face.
Hmmm idk about your statement about my gf. I think she will pretend it’s okay but inside be upset. Also I don’t think my gf sees me as a man she is more attracted to my feminine features like breasts. I don’t think we would be dating at all if I didn’t pass :/