I'm currently reading J. Michael Bailey's 'The man who would be queen' about boys who display gender nonconforming behaviour. It's sad that a lot of these kids now will be forced into the trans box even though it's clear many of them just grow up to be gay men

Well a lot of them claim that the theory of AGP has been 'disproven', which imo is a laughable claim. I think the real reason is that it gives people the impression that HSTS (homosexual transsexual, i.e. trans women who are attracted to men) are 'real' transsexuals, while AGPs are 'fake' perverts, and that makes AGPs and their sympathizers feel bad. Especially because people can and have been denied medical transition due to the perception that their gender identity is mainly sexual.

J Michael Bailey's book 'The man who would be queen' argues against this view. He suggests that AGPs are fetishistic, but that they are no more fetishistic than HSTS transsexuals because HSTS transsexuals fetishize straight men. In any case he thinks this wouldn't prove that transitioning is a bad for them.

Basically the traditional view was that transbians were fetishists who wouldn't benefit from medical transition, while 'straight' trans women were real transsexuals. I think it's very notable that this distinction maps to differences Bailey and Blanchard identified between AGPs and HSTS. AGPs are more masculine, more likely to have wives, almost never interested in men, so the view that they were less capable of being 'normal' women seems to be quite justifiable

"I'm now two years on T, I'm fatter, hairier, and I feel so happy with my body"

How many FTMs are out there waiting for this feeling to set in, even though they started off with completely unrealistic goals? How many of them are going to later find out they will never be happy the way this person is? How many will detransition, only to be told the should have known it wouldn't make them happy?

This shouldn't be especially surprising. Of course a lot of detransitioners are gender non conforming and prefer to present as the opposite sex, so if it comes down to a choice like this many will be tempted to take cross sex hormones.

I don't think TullipR has failed us or themselves. We need to avoid forcing detransitioners to live up to a gender ideal that's just the other side of the coin from their original transition. As long as they know transition isn't a panacea, they aren't being guided by the false notion of 'gender identity', and they have a comprehensive understanding of the consequences of HRT, then it's not a crime to explore some or all aspects of transition especially for someone who can no longer produce testosterone.

We need to throw out the bad aspects of transition (the idea of a 'true self', transition as the only response to gender dysphoria, inadequately informed patients) and keep the good (medical transition for people who will truly benefit from it).

You know, they may well say 'I told you so', but a lot of people expect this and instead hear "I am so relieved, thank god, you didn't seem happy, we love and respect you".

I can't promise your parents will react one way or another, but most don't take this situation as an opportunity to rub salt in the wound. In all likelihood they'll just be glad that this is over and done with. Above all, they aren't going to want you to stay trans forever just so you don't embarrass yourself

The craziest stuff is on the mypartneristrans subreddit. There are so many women whose husbands clearly only have a sexual interest in dressing up as women, they've figured out that something weird is going on, but they so deep into it they've convinced themselves that they are being bigoted by noticing that sex shouldn't define your whole life.

Because 'hate speech' is a highly contestable term and mostly just reflects woke politics. You won't find someone who says 'I hate all men', 'I hate Christians' etc getting banned for hate speech. Because it's not about hate, so detrans voices are an obvious target because the idea that some people are not trans despite experiencing GD is a real challenge to woke politics

I don't think gender being a 'spectrum' makes a lot of sense, a spectrum has a series of points, whether they are discrete or blend into one another.

On the contrary, gender has two fixed 'poles'. We all agree there are feminine qualities and masculine qualities, that's two fixed points. And perhaps we can argue that the absence of those qualities could qualify as a third fixed point. But it's not like the spectrum of light, for instance, where there are a bunch of very distinct and separate things that are not merely opposites but all individual flavours.

Moreover, I would argue nobody really treats maleness and femaleness in degrees. A GNC woman may be treated as 'less woman', but in a strictly metaphorical way. She'll be considered a poor example of a women, perhaps, but still by definition a woman rather than part-woman, or half-woman, or androgyne or whatever else.

Of course Hasan Piker is kicking someone when they're down. That's all he does, threaten and attack people online, or people who are smaller than him, and then run crying when someone his own size gives him the same back.

It happens all at once. You've seen information inconsistent with your view of the world, and it's started to pile up, and then suddenly you notice that your view of what is right and wrong doesn't seem to fit the information anymore.

You start off thinking the world hates gays, and it's a lot worse for transgenders who are being murdered every day. Nobody would transition for a bad reason, because it's such an unpleasant process. Obviously any critical headlines about the trans movement are just cryptotransphobia, trans women aren't trying to rape women in public toilets - most of them can't even bear to use their penis!

Then you realise that some people who you know definitely had dysphoria are detransitioning. They did everything right and they still didn't 'feel like' a woman. People say they have internalised transphobia, but you don't really believe that. You notice that, even though your transition is going well, your dysphoria often grows when you pass milestones - you were once ambivalent about your penis and suddenly you can't live with it anymore. You start to hear about other trans girls who have experience dramatic changes in sexual orientation after starting HRT, you wonder if that is changeable then how permanent is gender identity?

Suddenly, even though you still have your 'live and let live' attitude, that doesn't seem to answer the question any more. Sure people can transition if they want - but what should they want? Who is transition right for? Is it right for anyone? What about kids, who can't make decisions for themselves? Why is the trans lobby trying to make questioning a patients' gender illegal?