This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, the account appears authentic. There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or a bad-faith actor.
The user demonstrates a consistent, passionate, and highly detailed personal narrative across multiple posts. The comments show deep personal reflection, offer practical advice (e.g., on replacing a wardrobe), and reference specific, niche resources relevant to the detrans community. The language is emotionally charged and complex, which is consistent with a genuine individual who is passionate and angry about their experiences, not with a scripted bot.
About me
I started transitioning as a teenager because I felt deeply uncomfortable with my female body and was convinced my depression meant I was born the wrong sex. My online friends cheered me on, but I felt immediate regret after cutting my hair, which they dismissed as internalized transphobia. I broke free after realizing I could never truly be a man and that my self-hatred was rooted in trauma, not my body. I lost all my friends when I detransitioned, but I’ve since embraced my femininity as an important part of my healing. I now see my gender dysphoria was a symptom of deeper issues that needed therapy, not transition.
My detransition story
My whole journey with transition started because I felt deeply uncomfortable with my body, especially during puberty. I hated my breasts and felt a general sense of not fitting in. I now see this as a form of puberty discomfort and body dysmorphia. I was also struggling with depression and very low self-esteem. I started to believe that all these problems were because I was born in the wrong body and that I was actually a boy.
I was heavily influenced online and by my friends, who were all part of the LGBT community. They cheered me on, and it felt like I had finally found a place where I belonged. I socially transitioned and started to live as a boy. I cut my hair short and started binding. The big chop of my hair was a huge moment, and everyone told me the sorrow and regret I felt afterwards was just internalized transphobia. But for me, it was just plain sorrow and regret. I was losing a part of myself.
I was so deep in this mindset that I was planning to take hormones and get top surgery. I was constantly in this cycle of rumination, always thinking about gender. I see now that it was like being in a cult. You're allowed to be doubtful, but you're not allowed to fully walk away. The ideology keeps you looping back, making you think the only cure for your pain is more transition.
What finally broke me out of it was a few realizations. First, I realized that even if I transitioned, I would never be a man. I would just be a short, tiny "manlet" with big hips. All my traits, which I thought were so masculine and wrong, are actually celebrated in women. I started to see that my body wasn't the problem; my self-loathing was.
I also started to understand my own internalized issues. I had a huge problem with my mother, what some call a "mother wound." My mother was mentally ill and gave me up when I was 11. I think I resented the maternal, feminine role and wanted to destroy my femininity to avoid dealing with that grief. It wasn't about being a man; it was about running away from being a woman.
When I decided to detransition, I lost almost all of my friends. They exiled me completely because I challenged their narrative. They had only loved me as a queer mascot, a novelty. They weren't true friends. Letting go of them was hard, but it was necessary.
Embracing my femininity was key to my successful detransition. It wasn't about society's pressure to be feminine; it was an internal, emotional calling for me. I learned that female sexuality is my birthright, not something to be feared or rejected. I started taking better care of my body, my skin, and my hair. I found clothes that made me feel comfortable and good about myself. I sold my old masculine clothes and used that money to slowly build a new, feminine wardrobe.
I don't regret my transition because it led me to where I am now, but I see it clearly for what it was: a learned social illness, not an innate condition. I benefited from realizing that the only way out was to run from that ideology, not to cope with it. I had to stop granting it legitimacy in my mind.
My thoughts on gender now are that it's a social construct, and the dysphoria I felt was a symptom of deeper issues like trauma, low self-esteem, and depression. The answer wasn't to change my body but to heal my mind. I truly believe that for young people struggling, they need therapy to deal with the root causes, not affirmation and surgery. The threat of suicide is used as emotional blackmail to push people into irreversible decisions, and that is deeply wrong.
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 11 | My mother gave me up due to her mental illness and substance abuse. |
| During Puberty | Intense puberty discomfort; began to hate my breasts and developed body dysmorphia and low self-esteem. |
| 17 | Socially transitioned to male, influenced by online communities and friends; cut my hair short ("the big chop"). |
| 17 | Felt immediate sorrow and regret after cutting my hair, but was told it was "internalized transphobia." |
| 18 | Realized transitioning would not make me a real man and began to appreciate my female traits. |
| 18 | Understood the connection between my transition desires and my "mother wound" and other trauma. |
| 18 | Began to detransition and embrace my femininity. Lost my entire LGBT friend group. |
| 18 | Started to slowly replace my wardrobe with feminine clothes by consigning old items. |
Top Comments by /u/VioletPerfume:
I truly hope that your friends are forgiving and accept who you truly are, but be prepared for exile if these folks are deeply invested in the LGBT phenomenon. I was also afraid of losing people's trust after working so hard to make them accept me as a trans boy. My fear was mostly unfounded. Those who ceased to trust and appreciate my journey were the same ones cheering me on to seek mutilatory surgeries and hormones that would shut off my healthy reproductive system. They were not true friends. They saw me only as a mascot, a woke idol to cheer for.
What circles are you out in? Is it necessary to remain in these circles, or can you build new ones with a fresh restart as your unavoidable self?
Exactly. Imagine your daughter tells you she's fat and ugly, and you rush her to get liposuction and plastic surgery, because she's claiming that she'll kill herself if you don't 💀💀💀 no!! Youths in that situation need to go to theeerappyyyy, not a surgeon!
The other problem I'd have is the loss of a goal to work towards, I feel like I'd need some new big picture goal in my life to not just feel listless and make myself more depressed
Oh please oh please find something healthy to be excited for! There is plenty to choose from, and more than you would ever expect! It can be as simple as always looking forward to your favorite season or holiday, or as extravagant as saving up for a new vehicle or home. You can look forward to new career milestones, new friendships, and new discoveries. You can start a new book or movie series, or learn a craft or trade that you constantly develop. The best part is that all of these goals are 100% attainable. It can feel hard starting over and losing the sense of achievement that comes with transition milestones, but what were you really achieving in the first place?
"If you don't let these kids transition, they'll kill themselves" is a potent leftist tool of emotional blackmail. Coupled with a novel affinity for "mental health awareness", this is the ultimate threat used to make parents comply with the gender phenomenon and the medical industrial complex which profits from it. Transgender advocates give parents the ultimatum of transition or a death sentence.
Suicidal children should be immediately and primarily treated for suicidal ideation. Full stop. No matter what the cause. Advocates will interject here and claim that the inability to transition is causing the suicidality, when in reality, the desire to/perceived need for transition is what harms the child and drives her to suicidality. That desire is what should be treated and cured.
Let's treat it just like all the other forms of plastic surgery. Does your daughter say she'll kill herself if you don't let her go under the knife to fix her ugly face? Do you take her to the plastic surgeon? No, you don't, because the face was never the problem, her preoccupation with her self loathing was.
New detransitioners need to be bold, speak up, and stand up. I was entirely exiled from my LGBT friend group upon detransition because I challenged their cult-like narrative. I wear that as a badge of honor. The truth is terrifying to people so deluded.
Which would be more embarrassing? Telling them now, or suppressing your doubts and going on with a transition which soon becomes irreversible, and having to cope with that for the rest of your life?
If they love you, they will listen and forgive. If they are angry or argumentative towards your decision, they loved the novelty of your transness more than they loved you. It's a tough pill to swallow.
I used to go to a summer program that had a lot of "trans youth", spreading like wildfire each year. One summer, they invited a speaker to talk about his book concerning his quest for a doctor who would amputate his legs. Apparently noticing the parallels, a bunch of people got MAD.
For me, I realized that transitioning to "male" would only make me a short tiny manlet with big hips and eyes, devoid of most masculine characteristics, a la Ellen Page (or in my case, a hobbit). All of my traits, however, are highly celebrated in women. This realization helped me make the best of the body I was given.
The mother wound can be a HUGE catalyst for serious issues with your own womanhood. I'm sorry to hear about your loss so early in childhood. My mother is alive, but mentally ill and invested in substance abuse, and she gave me up around 11. I've only seen her about 10-15 times since then, and I haven't seen her at all since 2019.
IF you feel it's important, and you are comfortable doing so, the mother wound could be one of the strongest factors in your struggle for self acceptance. You may resent the maternal/wifelike role (and possible emotional incest) you were thrust into after her loss. Do you have other solid woman figures in your life? You may fear the ascent into womanhood if you have nobody to guide you along. Even if this isn't a conscious fear, it could manifest as the desire to destroy your femininity, and the things that remind you of your mother or of motherhood, in an attempt to avoid grief.
In my personal opinion, there are way too many "the problem isn't really that you're trans" red flags in your post for you to be anywhere near considering transition. Keep doing the therapy for the other issues, and see what happens to the dysphoria when the deeper triggers are resolved.
Edit: also, that type of therapy doesn't sound crazy at all. IMO it actually sounds better than the crap where they just feed you new thoughts that you "should be" thinking instead of encouraging you to explore yourself more deeply. The desire to deconstruct and rebuild yourself is rooted in some deep spiritual nastiness.
For me personally, merely coping with gender dysphoria kept me in a cycle of constantly looping back into transgender ideology, relapsing every time I tried to escape. To cope with a bad ideology is to grant it legitimacy in your mind, internalizing it as a part of yourself. Gender dysphoria is a learned social illness and not an innate mental condition. But then again, even those can be overcome through willpower.
It's kind of like just like with cults. You're allowed to be doubtful, but not to fully walk away. You're kept in a cycle of rumination, mulling over the problem that attracted you to the cult, caught in a feedback loop that constantly returns you to their proposed cure for the very disease they exacerbated within you. The only way out is to run.