This story is from the comments listed below, summarised by AI.
Authenticity Assessment: Not Suspicious
Based on the provided comments, this account appears to be authentic.
There are no serious red flags suggesting it is a bot or an inauthentic user. The comments display:
- Personal, nuanced perspective: The user shares a consistent, detailed personal history of being a "mannish woman" who navigated gender non-conformity without medical intervention.
- Emotional depth and empathy: The language is passionate and empathetic, especially in supportive comments, which aligns with a genuine individual who has strong feelings on the topic.
- Consistent worldview: The views expressed across multiple comments are complex and internally consistent, focusing on biological reality, criticism of modern gender labels, and the experimental nature of transition care for youth.
This is consistent with a real desister who is passionate about the subject.
About me
I was a tomboy who felt horrified by female puberty and the unwanted attention it brought. I realized I could embrace my masculine side by honoring my male ancestry without changing my body. I found peace as a masculine woman comfortable in my own skin. I worry that today, kids with similar feelings are pushed toward medical solutions with unknown long-term effects. I regret that more young people aren't hearing that you can be at home in your biological sex without conforming to stereotypes.
My detransition story
My whole journey with gender started when I was a kid. I was always a tomboy and never felt girly at all. Puberty was horrible for me. When I started developing as a female, it felt obscene. Men, even ones my dad's age, would make comments about my breasts, and it was a lot more than I, as a young teenage girl, was equipped to handle. I hated that attention and the way my body was changing.
I never really felt strictly male or female. Around the age of 12, I came to a kind of peace with it. I realised that I had just as many male ancestors as female ones in my genetic makeup. I decided that when I felt masculine, it was me leaning into and appreciating that male side of my ancestry. It wasn't about changing my body; it was about shaking off dated ideas of how I 'should' act based on my sex. I dressed in men's corduroy jackets from charity shops, wore flat shoes, and kept my hair short. I was just a masculine woman, comfortable in my own skin. I'm heterosexual, but I never felt that my interests or style had to align with what people expected of a woman.
I was lucky to grow up when I did, in the 70s and 80s, with the message that you could wear what you want and be who you want. I think that's why I see the intense labelling and pigeon-holing of young people today as so repugnant. You can be a woman and be whoever you want to be without having to explain yourself or change your body.
Looking back, I believe a lot of young people now are struggling with the same feelings I had but are being pushed toward a different conclusion. I’ve come to think that for some autistic kids, that intense feeling of being 'other' can make the idea of being trans seem like a way to finally be accepted and feel normal. And I worry that medical transition is being treated as a solution when it's still an experimental phase. Doctors and insurance companies admit that the long-term outcomes aren't fully known because we just don't have the data yet. These are strong medications and intense surgeries. Once the window for a natural puberty is gone, it's gone forever. You can't restart it at 20 or 30.
I don't regret the path I took because I never medically transitioned. I only ever transitioned socially in the sense that I presented myself in a masculine way, but I always respected my biology. My biggest regret is that this isn't the message more young people hear today. I think there's going to be a huge reckoning soon about medical malpractice for transitioning young people. I did my best with the knowledge I had at the time, and I wish that same grace for everyone else who is just trying to find their way.
Here is a timeline of my journey:
Age | Event |
---|---|
12 | Realised I could appreciate my male and female ancestry without changing my body. Decided to embrace a masculine style while accepting my female biology. |
N/A | Lived as a masculine, heterosexual woman, comfortable in my own skin without medical intervention. |
Top Comments by /u/Wickedbitchoftheuk:
I heard one commentator on the radio this morning saying that autistic children have an intense feeling of being 'other' and for many, the idea that they are perhaps trans, would allow them to be accepted and normal, and it honestly sounded so on-the-button that I nearly cried.
You're putting far too much value on what other people think. Unless you're trying to 'convert' them or harping on about it all the time ( or they are), it's just a different viewpoint from someone else and there are as many of them as there are opinions.
Trans treatment is still in an experimental phase (by Dr's and insurance companies own admissions) as treatment has not been given to so many people before. Unfortunately due to fears of being called transphobic, there simply aren't enough studies being done on long term outcomes. Data is coming in gradually as people age up but these are strong meds and intense surgeries and not to be taken lightly. Once the window for puberty has passed you have missed it. People put on pb's do not suddenly restart puberty with all of its changes ( height, penile growth, brain etc) at age 20 or 30 etc. Once it's gone, it's gone.
Well done. I think you picked up all the points the film was making. It was a good film - my sister thought it was one of the best she's seen - and as she is much more invested in her looks than I am, I find her reaction and yours to be quite enlightening.
Because they grow out of it. Puberty is f*ING horrible. Being a developing female is worse. Men your fathers age make comments about your breasts. It's obscene and frankly a hello a lot more than most early teenage girls are equipped to handle. And the amount of it! Dear Lord! Men really, honestly and truly should be ashamed of themselves. If all of us could just go from child to fully aware and able-to-cope adult women, we could handle it. But kids don't have a chance.
Look, there is an equal number of men and women ancestors in every one of us. Sometimes we identify more strongly with either our male or female ancestors and that feeling doesn't always match our present presentation. That's OK. We accept our genetic/physical form and sex because we live in our body and it has needs and health issues that we need to be aware of and respect - but we can honour the other side of our ancestry by living tried to how close to them we feel. It's not about changing our body. It's about shaking off dated ideas about how we 'should act'.
You're probably a little ahead of the curve. Medical malpractice for transitioning young people is going g to become huge in about a year or two's time. I think so.e firms are picking it up already and I think that's why some insurance companies have started rejecting claims for treatment without more stringent testing.
I have grown up not feeling particularly male or female. I have always been a tomboy, have never felt girly. I decided round about 12 that though I was female, and you've got to respect the biology, there were as many men in my genetic make up as women, so it was perfectly fine to appreciate both the male side and female sides of my biological make up. So when I was feeling masculine, that was just me leaning in to all the guys who were part of creating me. I think the trouble nowadays is that we have to put ourselves in boxes, give ourselves labels, which we were busy doing away with in the 70's. Being appreciative of both sexes and their input into my unique make up, was not something to be fought about or give me any stress. It was just how I was. It wasn't a problem for me. Nor did it require me making any great changes. I tended towards mens corduroy jackets from charity shops; I wore flat shoes, kept my hair shortish. I'm hetero, in case you were wondering. Just a mannish woman, comfy in my own skin. I wish .ore youngsters were nowadays.
You can be masculine, do classicly male hobbies, outfits, whatever. As someone brought up in the 70s and 80s, we were well drilled in the wear what you want, do the career you want, live the way you want mantra. I think that's why so many women my age see the pigeon-holing of men and women nowadays so repugnant. You can still ne a woman and be whoever you want to be, without having to explain or apologise to anyone else.
First of all, please, forgive yourself. You were a child, you were trying to deal with things you simply didn't have the experience or bandwidth to cope with. You were a lamb fallen in a river, and trying to find a way to catch something that would help you climb out. You did your best. Secondly, give yourself some credit. You have matured, looked back, and have enough self-awareness to realise the things you did were unhelpful but to understand why you did them Thirdly, give yourself some love. You have endured, you have survived - more than that, you have lived. You have tremendous insight. Take a while to really allow yourself to mature more, grow stronger, mentally and physically and most of all, emotionally. In the years to come, people like you will be the ones able to help, guide and support the young people currently being tucked into this culture? - to come to terms with their lives past, present and futures.